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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Holidays

    By nick - 22/03/2009 00:06 - United States

    Today, I was on a cruise and fell asleep next to the pool. I had an intense dream that I had fallen off into the ocean. I rolled off my sun chair into the water and woke up screaming uncontrollably, I thought I was in the ocean. I was in the kiddy pool. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 59 278
    You deserved it 13 310
    Share  

    By Dale - 21/02/2009 02:20 - Costa Rica

    Today, I got to Costa Rica for my first vacation in five years. I immediately rented a scooter for the week after checking into my prepaid, no refunds, hotel. On the way back from the rental agency I hit a pothole and broke my leg and ripped the skin off my foot. I'm flying home tomorrow. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 47 542
    You deserved it 4 193
    Share  

    By ... - 27/11/2008 05:30 - France

    Today, I was in India. At the airport, the men and women were being searched separately. The guy welcoming us pointed me towards the women's area. I had to explain to him that I was a guy. It took 15 minutes. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 32 150
    You deserved it 3 893
    Share  
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    Today, I went to a costume contest as Jon Snow from Game of Thrones. I won, which was nice, until I was told that the only flaws in my "Samwell Tarly" outfit were my long hair and wrong sword. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 21 760
    You deserved it 2 833
    Today, I was kayaking with my family for my birthday when we tipped over while going down a rocky cascade. My husband badly cut up his arm, and my car keys and my phone both went for a swim and never returned. Great birthday. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 22 477
    You deserved it 8 690
    Today, my boyfriend started affectionately calling me "Burt Reynolds" because I wax my upper lip. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 28 938
    You deserved it 5 465
    Today, I woke up next to the girl I had drunk intercourse with last night. Before we got it on, I noticed a package of birth control pills on her nightstand. Because of this, I felt no need to use a condom, or pull out. When I woke up, I noticed those "pills" were actually a makeup case. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 8 056
    You deserved it 63 325
    Today, I was tailgated by a car with his high beams on for an hour. Any time I changed my speed or lane, he would do the same. I finally managed to get away from him because a cop pulled me over and gave me a speeding ticket. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 7 146
    You deserved it 922
    Today, I contacted my ex asking him to please sign away his parental rights so that my husband could legally adopt my son. My ex hasn’t seen my son in nearly 10 years and wants nothing to do with him. However, he won’t sign because in his exact words, “You don’t deserve happiness.” FML
    I agree, your life sucks 550
    You deserved it 121
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