Intimacy: Training - FML

Training

By Anonymous - 10/04/2011 05:07 - United States

Spicy

Today, I promised my boyfriend a blow job every time he does the dishes. Every dish in the house has been washed three times already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 472

You deserved it 72 672

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Same thing different taste

By Michelle - 17/10/2013 11:51 - Australia - Richmond

Today, my boyfriend told me that I have the bad habit of not doing the dishes before he has his daily piss in the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 772

You deserved it 5 625

By Myboyfriendisaromanticslob - 10/03/2011 05:09 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend set up a very romantic dinner. Afterwards, he offered to wash the dishes while I went upstairs and relaxed. His way of washing the dishes was to scrape all the food off, then wipe the juices off the dishes with a paper towel before putting them back in the cupboards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 442

You deserved it 6 475

By Anonymous - 26/12/2011 15:32 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend did the washing as an attempt to help me. Not only are all my clothes now pink, he refuses to do the dishes, vacuuming, bathroom, ironing etc., as he has done "plenty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 752

You deserved it 4 621

This Charming Man

By Anonymous - 21/04/2021 14:00

Today, I explained to my man child of a boyfriend that we don't reuse dirty dishes. We have to wash them. He doesn't think it's gross and yelled at me, throwing the pan in the sink. Oh, he also refuses to wash dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 372

You deserved it 538

By Anonymous - 19/03/2010 10:05 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I realized that my new boyfriend only showers about once every ten days, and to get him to shower more often I have to bribe him with oral sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 912

You deserved it 22 210

By kj1 - 17/02/2014 18:28 - United States - Draper

Today, my boyfriend yelled at me from the other room for washing the dishes "too loudly". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 313

You deserved it 6 719

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 19:16 - United States

Spicy

Today, I told my boyfriend that I love him. He responded by asking for a blowjob. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 021

You deserved it 14 604

By AprilFlowers - 01/12/2009 17:15 - United States

Today, I woke up early and made my boyfriend french toast. When he woke up, he yelled at me because it was his dish day and I was creating more dishes for him to do. He made me do the dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 212

You deserved it 7 397

By msjustine - 06/05/2011 19:27 - United States

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 974

You deserved it 13 385

Deal or no Deal

By Anonymous - 16/04/2020 02:00

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend's farts got so bad that we made a deal: every day that he doesn't fart, he gets a blowjob. Suddenly, he's not letting gas out anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 2 132

Next

Top comments

nebula748 14

Sunday 10 April 2011 12:11

What did you expect?

docscientist 9

Sunday 10 April 2011 12:18

I guess you should have him eat out more.

Comments

siilvr 0

Monday 11 April 2011 7:26

Yesssss haha. youre bf is my heroo

nerdwithagun 0

Monday 11 April 2011 7:46

Is it bad if this post turned me on?

EarAcheMyEYE10 2

Monday 11 April 2011 9:23

Do you have a sister??!!

purple91 8

Monday 11 April 2011 10:40

Aw, he sounds cute.

blackopsFTW 0

Monday 11 April 2011 11:37

you're a gift to men, wat a great gf

francisw93 3

Monday 11 April 2011 11:54

break the dishes and get paper plates. then you just throw em

wriptidez 0

Monday 11 April 2011 12:07

sheesh

alipod 11

Monday 11 April 2011 12:33

now promise him an anal sex if he clean your home without any single dust on the floor. i'm sure he is better that kirby.

alipod 11

Monday 11 April 2011 12:35

or he is already doing anal??

ekb294 4

Monday 11 April 2011 12:37

and ur surprised that worked? do u know nothing about males?..

dcrider 0

Monday 11 April 2011 13:10

just think... you don't have to clean the house or do laundry anymore... just get him to do it... along with everything else... my ex wife did it to me for years...

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Today, after living in Korea for 6 months due to my husband's military career, doctors finally found out why I've been sick since I've been here. I'm allergic to the air. The air quality is so bad here that it is making me sick. Only 2 more years to go before we get moved again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 146

You deserved it 397

Today, I went to hug my husband and give him a kiss. He flinched away and asked what I was doing, because I apparently never hug him, so he thought I might be about to prank him or something. Now I feel bad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 112

You deserved it 647

Today, I called my usual babysitter, one of the few people who can handle my difficult kids, to ask her to watch them for a night next week. She refused. It turns out my wife has been repeatedly underpaying her and she's fed up with it. So long date nights, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 208

You deserved it 377

Today, my parents surprised me by redecorating my room. I think they were more surprised by the box of naughty toys under my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 083

You deserved it 11 506

Today, after months of hurtful and derogatory remarks from matches, I had to add the line "Not trans, just ugly." to my Tinder bio. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 058

You deserved it 357

Today, I found out just how much of a psychotically insecure nitwit my boyfriend is. He flew into a screaming rage that I was only adding cucumbers to my water and my meals lately to insinuate that he has a small penis. Yeah, I’m confused too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 679

You deserved it 261