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By yuckduck - 10/04/2015 12:29 - Canada - Brandon

Today, I went to a job interview. It would have been fine if I had remembered it was over the phone, and not in person. I drove two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 815

You deserved it 10 271

yuckduck tells us more.

yuckduck 9

Friday 10 April 2015 22:53

Ok guys, figured I'd give a quick update. Thanks to all of you who realized it was a mistake anyone could make! Lately I've been looking for a job, so I have a lot of interviews to keep straight. I had this interview, and another one tomorrow and they are both in the same town, I thought the interview tomorrow was the phone interview, and the one today was in person. Unfortunately I made a mistake, but I've learned to definitely keep my things more organized. The interviewer also completely understood and let me do it in person anyways. Hopefully you all learn from my mistake

By yapDogs - 10/05/2015 01:43 - United States - Fort Myers

Today, I sent a $120 bouquet of flowers for mother's day. When I called tonight see if my Mom got them, she replied that they were still on the doorstep because she "didn't want the dogs to get excited and start barking" when she opened the front door to bring them in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 878

You deserved it 2 391

By xswitch74 - 16/03/2015 14:36 - United Kingdom

Today, my ex called me up to suggest that we become friends, only so that she could introduce me to her new boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 601

You deserved it 4 217

By rinakitty94 - 29/06/2015 17:30 - United States - Sunset

Today, my fiancé heard I was having a rotten day at work. He stopped by the flower shop and bought me a lovely rose which I put right next to my work station. That is until a giant wasp flew out and stung me. I still have a swollen arm hours later. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 230

You deserved it 2 253

By smellslikeahangover - 29/07/2015 02:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while waiting for an interview at the career that I've been spending months tailoring my résumé for, I was thrown up on by my only competitor. Guess who got the job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 866

You deserved it 1 831

By OptMouse - 14/04/2015 11:50 - Denmark - Lyngby

Today, my supervisor forced me to bring the image of a failed simulation to the group meeting, because he thought it looked funny. So did the others and it's now going on our webpage. I have to provide a scientific description of how I made a mistake in my code. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 757

You deserved it 2 807

By struckbystarzz - 27/03/2015 13:12 - United States - Taunton

Today, my stomach started to hurt. When I got home, my parents had company over, which I had to rush past to use the bathroom. After being in the bathroom for about 3 minutes, my mother yells to me from the other room, in front of the guests, "Are you OK in there?" I'm 27. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 557

You deserved it 4 090

By anonymous - 13/07/2015 09:45 - China - Shanghai

Today, I was yelled at by a bunch of angry people because I couldn't physically move out of the way while 10 more tried to force their way onto a subway in Shanghai. Then one old lady started hitting me with her purse to get me to move even more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 949

You deserved it 2 079

By The Sbeak - 13/02/2009 15:54 - United States

Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type 'virginia' into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for 'virgin boy assholes'. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I'm a young guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 557 842

You deserved it 45 631

By Justincredible69 - 29/06/2015 20:29 - United States

Today, I was legitimately sick so I called in to work. Apparently, 4 other guys on my line called in too. My boss thought we planned it. Now we're all written up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 963

You deserved it 1 567

By Masift - 02/03/2015 17:06 - United States - Sarasota

Today, after many tests and doctor visits, I finally found out the reason for my flu-like symptoms isn't a vitamin deficient or anything. The damn tea I drink every morning makes me feel sick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 834

You deserved it 5 453

Masift tells us more.

Masift 21

Monday 2 March 2015 23:08

You see, I only drink tea in the mornings with breakfast before I go to class and I feel like crap all day. However I don't drink tea on the weekends (I don't know why) but Sunday morning, I drank the same tea and I started having the symptoms again. And of course as usual, I drank the tea again this morning, and it felt the same.

I'll be back

By missmolliss - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Norfolk

Today, I keep getting calls from companies that I applied to for interviews. The thing is, I moved 1,000 miles away a week ago because I couldn't find a job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 771

You deserved it 3 467

By I did them anyway - 20/07/2015 22:01 - New Zealand

Today, my flatmate asked me to wash the large pile of dishes on the bench, and if I would start on cleaning the house which was a total mess. This would have been fine if I hadn't just walked in after being away for a week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 057

You deserved it 2 189

By stuck - 23/03/2015 15:51 - United States - Bridgeview

Today, my boyfriend wrecked our car. Now I can't get to work in order to make the money we need to buy a new one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 615

You deserved it 4 669

By akimbojuju - 22/06/2015 15:12 - United States

Today, my pinky finger found out how much a king size bed weighs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 944

You deserved it 2 898

By firehurts - 08/06/2015 23:38 - United States - Wallkill

Today, I threw a bonfire for my birthday. My boyfriend managed to set my leg on fire by throwing his liquor bottle into the fire. Happy birthday to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 299

You deserved it 2 733

Mood ruiner

By Skittles - 13/08/2017 20:00

Today, while my husband and I were having sex, we were trying this strawberry flavored lube which had a very strong candy smell. My husband starts laughing mid-performance, looks me in the eye, and exclaims "F*CK THE RAINBOW, TASTE THE RAINBOW!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 863

You deserved it 1 310

By DietWater - 07/08/2015 22:13 - United States - Beaumont

Today, I went to the park and people were crowded around some dancers. One of the dancers danced up to me, gave me a flower, and winked at me. I was very flattered, until the same dancer asked me to give the flower back after the dance so he could use it on the next show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 482

You deserved it 2 367

By KillMePlease - 11/03/2015 20:15 - United States - Hicksville

Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 374

You deserved it 2 575

Duty

By jami898 - 18/08/2015 04:30 - United States - Medford

Today, I passed out. I fell to the hardwood floor, cut my chin, and bit through my lip. Fortunately, my brother was there to help stop the bleeding and get me some water. All I had to do was wait until he finished his game of Call of Duty. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 633

You deserved it 1 867

Game over

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I folded a stack of 2,500 brochures for the new exhibit we're putting on at the museum where I work. As I was finishing up, I got an email. The dates have just been changed, so all the brochures have to be reprinted and refolded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 729

You deserved it 2 009

Good one, nice

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I found a leather book in my husband's sock drawer with "BRO CODE" on the front. It was blank except for the last page, which said, "NICE TRY SUSAN BUT EVERYONE KNOWS BRO CODE IS UNWRITTEN AND FOR GUYS ONLY". Well-played, husband. Well-played. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 460

You deserved it 5 189

Bad dog!

By A…… - 23/05/2015 03:25 - United States - Warner Robins

Today, my neighbor's dog decided to knock over our trash cans, which were full of my bathroom trash. I had to pick up tampon and maxi pad wrappers from all over the neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 456

You deserved it 2 573

By Anonymous - 12/05/2015 03:02 - United States - Springfield

Today, my new prescription medicine for my chronic acne did in fact work. It worked by inflaming the skin around my zits so that they blended in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 928

You deserved it 2 099

By disney_dick - 08/01/2018 00:00 - United States - Mims

Today, my boyfriend asked me to try humming during a blow job. He seemed to like it at first, but apparently, "I'll Make a Man Out of You" from Mulan wasn't a good choice. He still isn't speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 997

You deserved it 2 053

By QueenCee - 02/04/2015 02:04 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while at work, a guy complained about me "touching his fries." At first I thought it was a joke, because he kept smiling, even after I offered him new ones. I realized it wasn't a joke when he threw the fries on the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 001

You deserved it 2 539

Content warning

By imblue42 - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I walked into the dining room to find my mom popping pimples on my dad's back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 601

You deserved it 3 796

By grossedout - 22/05/2015 15:02 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, I had to ask one of my coworkers if we were supposed to return a client's teeth to her. I work at a jewellery store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 971

You deserved it 2 245

By Anonymous - 12/03/2015 16:29 - United States - Cass Lake

Today, my boss told me I got my new job because she rejected candidates that seemed "too confident" or "too pretty." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 484

You deserved it 3 038

By Mmorgan771 - 04/08/2015 17:02 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, at work, a customer told me how unprofessional my piercing made me look, and insisted that someone else wait on his table. It's not a piercing, it's a mole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 469

You deserved it 1 729

FML on Facebook

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was walking by a neighbour when he said, "Is your dad home?" I swiftly replied, "I'm good thanks." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 042

You deserved it 381

Today, my doctor called and asked me when I could have my broken hand x-rayed again. I said the ER staff had told me it was a bad sprain over two weeks ago. I'm now in a full cast, and have to have my partially healed bones re-broken. There goes my summer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 953

You deserved it 2 842

Today, I was in IKEA, furniture shopping with my dad. He was looking at one couch that was particularly small. I said "dad that couch is for like a midget." I look over to see a midget looking at me, sitting on the same couch in a different color. He definitely heard me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 797

You deserved it 67 527

Today, I went into a haunted house. Around 30 seconds into the adventure, I couldn't stop screaming at the top of my lungs from all of the scares. Suddenly, the little girl ahead of me, who was all by herself, turned around and told me to "suck it up and grow a pair, loser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 165

You deserved it 42 093

Today, I returned home early from a week away for work. I was worried about my husband's mental health after a week alone with our two ADD kids. He wasn’t expecting me, but I was surprised to see the house cleaner than it had ever been, and our children happily reading on the couch. How did he do that? FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 556

Today, a male co-worker asked me in what shape I shave my pubic hair. Jokingly, I replied that I have a very nicely trimmed dodecahedron. Now he's telling everyone at work that I have a venereal disease. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 165

You deserved it 6 585