FML - The Follow-Up

Why did the mirror have holes in it? A moron kept trying to shoot himself.

Thanks for all the well wishes and advice! I got some X-rays done and thankfully nothing was fractured or broken (and the screws from a previous break did not get wrenched loose in the fall)! I've been lucky enough to be assigned to completing the tasks, favors and whatnot, where I can prop my foot up and keep ice on it. I've also purchased a nice pair of flats, because there is no way I'm falling and breaking myself day of the wedding. As for a response from the bride, she pretty much told me it took a lot longer to fall than she thought it would (I'm super, super clumsy), and to keep off my feet so I can still be in the wedding without hurting myself again.

Hey guys, OP here! Yes, it did start off as a friendly game- we all have a really sick sense of humor, so the worse the cards got, the more we laughed. Right around the last two hands, my best friend's mother started screaming at her husband for "cheating" and then everyone got involved on both sides, and then **** were pulled out, and the phrase, "Suck these nipples!" was shouted. The dog is just a brat, but it added to the chaos. We all laughed after, but that's an image you never forget.

OP here, My bf happened to be half asleep and as such is rather blond when so. (So no, he doesn't need sex ed as it has little to do with this topic per say). Him squeezing me whilst on my period has been a discussion point over the 6yrs we've been together, as yes, if done right, literally (TMI) squeezes out (insert words) and I really hate it, (guys, think of it as similar feeling to wetting yourself accidentally, it's a really yuck feeling). Thanks though for your comments and FYL's. :3 you've made us both laugh til our cheeks were sore. So again Thanks.

You'd be right! I'll try and condense the story for you. So basically, I was playing Counter-Strike: Global Offensive (the game mentioned in my post) and my team was messing about and killing each other. In my frustration, I called the one who was the most annoying on my team a baked potato. It seems that he too must have been frustrated, because the next thing I know, he's called a vote to kick me from my team. Since I'm at the top of the leaderboard and I'm carrying my team (despite losing by a huge margin), I think to myself "Well, it's not like they're going to vote 'Yes', they need me on this team if we're ever going to win!" But, to my surprise, they all accepted the vote and I was kicked, consequently resulting in a 7 day ban from Competitive Matchmaking. Well, that's it! I hope this backstory behind it was sufficient.

I want to thank everyone for their comments. When I went to bed crying it was nearly 4am and he had to pick up our 2 kids from his moms house at 6am. We have our issues and it's just one if those humps we are trying to get over. I posted venting cause I was frustrated. He travels lots for work and hardly sees me and our kids I think a big part of it is depression. Not that that's an excuse. We talked more before he had to leave out of town again today for 2 weeks and we are gonna try and resolve our issues though I'm not sure how well that will work out. But I am trying to stay positive. As much as it hurts he's doing his best to be honest with me and talk it through. We were both just very tired and like I said he had to pick up our kids. We have been together nearly 6 years. And he's the only person I love and trust the only ones I love more are our kids. Now matter how hard this is hurting me right now I am trying to look at the positive and moved forward.

Op here. My dad has a car repair shop and the biker gang rented the property next door. So he decided the smartest move would be to intimidate them to make sure they won't cause trouble. Which, I'm pretty sure, is going to cause a shitload of trouble...

Hey guys OP here. I'm a little late on the follow up but here it is anyway. I obviously complained to my mum who sat her down and told her how painful her pregnancies had been. My sister seemed adequately scared. My sister now insists that she had just been kidding but I know for a fact that she wasn't. And finally I assure you guys if she ever brings a guy home to 'stop her periods' I will personally get rid of him.

I just want to thank everyone for their support. Always be careful of strange looking insects. You never know which ones are dangerous.

Hey guys, OP here. I'm quite surprised this was published, it happened on Saturday. It's a cleaning job that I am doing, my boss has been nagging me a lot, making me redo things (she is really a perfectionist!!) usually she isn't there when I clean, but she came Saturday to do some things in her clinic and she asked if I wanted a coffee, which I ofcourse said yes to. When she came with the coffee I tasted it quickly and it was quite bitter... So when she went to do something else quick, I kinda ran to the kitchen and got the sugar... At least it was in sugar thingy..., then I poured it in my coffee! And since I'm kinda a shy person I really couldn't tell her. Just had to pokerface through it... (Yes my stomach did hurt alittle after it!)

Hey guys! OP here! It stunk not going on vacation. From the beginning, we ALL thought we had to take the final. In the syllabus it said it was worth 30% of our grade. He's a new professor and this is a psychology class. I guess some type of experiment??? I was so mad, but I still have a 3.8 GPA to prove for it!!!

Hey, OP here! Just to clarify, I normally DO cover my mouth when yawning. The wasp just beat me to the punch. At least I'm not allergic, and it's definitely something I've been chuckling about most of the day. Luckily, my boyfriend was able to get me to see the bright side of this event. :)

Ok guys, figured I'd give a quick update. Thanks to all of you who realized it was a mistake anyone could make! Lately I've been looking for a job, so I have a lot of interviews to keep straight. I had this interview, and another one tomorrow and they are both in the same town, I thought the interview tomorrow was the phone interview, and the one today was in person. Unfortunately I made a mistake, but I've learned to definitely keep my things more organized. The interviewer also completely understood and let me do it in person anyways. Hopefully you all learn from my mistake

OP here. My insurance was liability only and I'm having trouble tracking down who lost the beam. Might have to eat the cost myself. Not fun but thankfully no one was injured!

I didn't have enough room to tell the full story, but yeah... I'm pretty shy :/ I can talk to strangers and people fine and introduce myself to people, and I like to think I'm a nice person to be around, but I hate "inconvieniencing people" so I was scared to go over and ask if I could come too cause I thought my presence would make things awkward and ruin it for everyone... yeah. My parents got mad at me too when I told them, but I'm just really socially awkward so that happens a lot. Also, they're just a really close group of friends with all the same classes, etc and I'm just sort of that weird outlier lol. Most of the people in the group were acquiantances who I talked to occasionally but weren't very close to, though there were a couple of friends I was closer with a couple years ago when neither of us really had friends then I am now. And honestly, those "friends" definitely use me and take more than they give; they come to me for a shoulder to cry on and a secret-keeper to rant to but don't really talk to me otherwise... I'm the last resort :( I definitely recognize that they aren't he healthiest relationships, and I would disassociate myself from them altogether, but I honestly don't have anyone else ;-; Better to have half-friends than no one, reputation wise... Plus, I'm transferring to a new school this year so yay for fresh starts! I'm just staying optimistic that I'll find some... more faithful friends I guess. Thank you to the people who posted nice messages, I honestly needed that :)

OP here, yes the girl was fine and laughing when I ran up to her to see if she was okay. My dogs just a very large, very excitable english mastiff puppy and the girl loves dogs so it worked out fine after I bought her another ice-cream. And my puppy wasn't on a leash because we were at a dog park playing with other dogs and she was very fired up. The little girls parent saw what happened and were very understanding :)

Thanks for the comments and suggestions. This has actually happened to me a few times before. I have a strange medical condition that affects my hormones, so that is the most likely culprit. I am seeing quite a few doctors, and none of them are very concerned. They have conducted quite a few tests and nothing was too out of the ordinary. I do not have a tumor (thankfully). To #1, I have been told not to express it because that can encourage my body to produce more milk, but that was quite a nice suggestion. I didn't actually know they did that. :) #3 I am actually not on the pill because I reacted badly to it due to my condition. (I had my period for 5 months straight. Yeah, that wasn't very fun) Also, to everyone suggesting I may be pregnant, my purity ring would beg to differ ;P Again, thanks for the concern and the laughs :) but the situation is under control. Bye!

I love reading your comments, they are amazing :D I thought it only happened in comics that sort of thing too. But the sheer force of this wave actually made me nearly fall over (the road drainage pipe was blocked I can only assume). And living in Australia means that we are not used to much rain. But I sure was wishing I had taken more notice. That being said, I can also add that the idea of bring extra clothes to work because of rain is a fairly foreign idea to us. Usually its just a light sprinkle throughout the day if at all, so often people don't even worry about an umbrella, unless we know its going to get heavy. As for work, I don't think my manager cared too much, she just found me a towel and let me do what I needed to. And I have no idea if the truck driver did it on purpose or even noticed. But judging the position of everything, I would say it was unavoidable for him. And he was coming up behind me, so I don't see him coming to avoid it. 10/10 will be more careful in the future :)

OP here. First off I am a girl. Second we were talking on the phone so it was not as awkward as it could have been. The awkward thing is that she didn't really approve of my relationship at first and still is getting adjusted to the idea. She kind of just laughed it off but I couldn't tell if it was an awkward silence laugh or a funny laugh.

OP here! No, my stitches weren't anywhere near my butt, I have a bunch on my arm. And, well.. the doctor sewed me up really tight, and I legitimately ripped them while pushing. Lmao. Not my finest moment, but definitely FML worthy. The doctors in the Niagara Region were half asleep over the Easter weekend, my sewed up wound actually looks like a ******.

Hello im op. I live in california, so its nice to have rain. It rained so hard last night that there's a steady dribble of rain dripping on my bed. We're short on money right now though, so it'll be a while until it can be fixed

Alright. OP here. My workplace switched managers due to our store getting a bad rating from corporate and sales basically tanking. He was demoted to a different store and instead decided to quit. I wasn't getting hours before my old manager left either. I had talked to him and he said the ratio with sales versus hours employees are working was out of whack or something along those lines, and since I hadn't been fully trained yet I couldn't run the shop on my own or even with one to two others there since they would have been either doing all the work or they wouldn't have needed me there. Also pretty much very other co worker had been whittled down to only one to three shifts a week other than the supervisors so that was out of my control but things are supposed to change when the new manager comes in. My new manager comes in a few weeks ago and I was still coming in every week to check the schedule. At this point nobody knew that's what my old manager had said. I kept seeing coworkers and talking to them, but never my new manager so I checked to see when he would be in. Inconveniently, just after this new manager transferred to our store he went on a two and a half week vacation (three weeks of work). The day he comes back in I come in and introduce myself and say I would like to discuss hours, and he has the most confused look on his face ever. I punch in my employee number and it says I am no longer employed. That's when we called the owner and figure out what had happened. They said they would call me. That was on Saturday and it's now Tuesday, so i have no idea whether or not I will be getting my job back. Either way I am looking for employment elsewhere since I obviously don't have much stability at my current workplace and the business is suffering badly anyway.

OP here, hi. I REALLY can’t believe this got posted. Out of all the times I tried, this FML had to be my first that got published. I would’ve preferred some others, but that’s what you get for trying I guess. I bet you’re all wondering about my age, I’m 19. Being completely curious about the background of most FMLs, I promised myself I’d do a follow-up no matter what, so here it is. It seems my post has divided the community. I trim! Thanks to everyone jumping to my defense saying that unshaven/untrimed hair isn’t strong enough to pierce through clothing. It has grown a little longer in the last couple of weeks since I’m currently at home for the semester break and left my trimmer in my apartment at the university (I have a seperate razor for my armpits). But its still in a normal range even if I say so myself. To the event itself: I haven’t been feeling well the last few days and had been wearing the sweatpants, that are a little on the flimsy side, for a little over 24 hours. I was with my family but they didn’t pay attention to me. In our house everywhere is cat hair, so its not a notable thing to pick a few of the cats hairs of your clothing. Imagine my surprise when I tried removing that particular hair and I felt a tuck. It didn’t hurt, like some might think, cause I don’t rip cat hair from my clothing. I got up, washed my hands and moved my sweatpants around so it was tucked back in. Not a permanent solution, I know, but I do plan on taking care of it this week. I hope you all understand that I mean I will trim this week. To all those people saying „EWWW, OP YOU HAVE TO SHAVE“: I’m not here to please you and I can do whatever I want with my body as long as it doesn’t affect others and believe me, this sure as hell doesn’t affect you, so please hold back your unwanted advice. On the hygienic viewpoint: I have never read this much about vaginal care at once, and that on FML. While you can do whatever you feel right about, don’t lecture me on what you THINK is best. I like lifestyle advice best with facts that have been scientifically proven. Ratings in the **** industry don’t count. The pro bush front almost has me convinced to let it sprout, because it appears to have a lot of (hygienic) advantages, but I think I strike the happy medium and keep with neat trimming. I would ask my boyfriend on his preference, but I’m single (always have been and fear that I always will be, but I think that‘s another FML altogether). I hope I answered most of your questions. I’m purposly not answering all of them, but if you ask nicely and respectfully maybe I will. Thanks again to those who defended me and didn’t assume I was a unhygienic, disgusting bitch, just because I let my pubic hair grow a little. You’re the best and I really feel accepted here and much better about the FML. Without you, there probably wouldn’t be a follow-up. Also some comments really made me laugh out loud, keep up the good work!

So a follow up. Once my head felt better I did buy her a new one. I do see a few asking what I did to deserve this. She's only three and didn't realize there would be any consequences, only thinking it would be funny. The only thing I can think of doing to even possibly deserve it is I told her she needed to stop running around yelling. But nah, all's well now I guess

The car has a computer system that tells you the problem. It needed an oil change and it keeps beeping until you do it. Considering it just came on yesterday it was safe to drive home without getting it changed.

To answer some responses Im a girl and I don't put the parking brake on, my mom happens to somehow put it on whilst driving and she does not notice the light on the dashboard :/

Hello everyone, OP here. I'm surprised this made it in! The main problem with the internet going down when it did was that the library has very limited hours during Easter break and, also due to the holiday, my department and almost all university facilities are closed, which is where I would normally go to get internet if I couldn't have it at home. I also 'could' get free wifi in places like cafes, but often cannot get any meaningful work done in public places where people are being loud and I don't have room for my books, notebooks, etc. I also thought it would be worth it to be able to work at home since I am a night owl and do most of my best work in the evenings, when most places where I could get free wifi would be closed. In addition, the day I submitted the FML wasn't the first day the internet had been out, and I had been having trouble finding a peaceful place to work while being repeatedly told that Tuesday was the earliest I could expect to get regular internet back. It was also a bigger problem because I live in university housing (college) and the internet was out in my entire college AND in the one next to mine, so I figured that I wouldn't be the only one to use the wireless thing (as we all have deadlines to meet and I wasn't the only one upset about this) and the others could chip in for the cost. I wouldn't even have minded shouldering the cost myself if I was actually going to get some use out of the thing because it would have been worth it to be able to work at home, or at least in a more comfortable location than a fast food restaurant or Starbucks. I just thought it was irritating (and funny at my own expense) that the internet picked both the worst time to go out AND to come back on. Since it seemed like a belated and very elaborate April Fool's joke on me, I decided to make something good of it and send it in to FML. By the way, I don't THINK I can return the thing, but I'll be going back in to the shop to check on that on Tuesday, and, if not, as others have said I can always get use out of it while travelling, or if the internet goes out again, which it has before (not at any particularly crucial times before this though). At the very least, now I have a funny story to tell.

Hiya, OP here! I'm honestly surprised this was posted, but hopefully I can make a few things clear! I work at a Super Target, and honestly, the thing most irritating to me is that they didn't immediately notice how low my amount of transactions are. a normal week of cashiering at the front lanes is about 900-1300 transactions. Having 1500 for two months is abnormally low, especially for a full time cashier like me. It should've been taken into account that I'm not often at the lanes when they told me my score, but it is what it is. For those telling me to have friends fill out a survey, I like how you think but unfortunately the surveys are printed on receipts and it is sporadic. I never know which receipt will get one until it prints, and I always inform guests when they get one and ask that if they have time to go ahead and tell us how we're doing. Lastly, my manager was super understanding. She knew I was hardly ever doing cashiering on a normal lane, and she was telling me about my personal score because we had an important guy from Corporate coming in and we had to know, my score just caught the other team leads off guard and they were initially upset at how low it was, until they learned why. I believe my score is actually the lowest of all cashiers here. So in short, it was all a misunderstanding because of the amount of times I actually cashier on the checkout lanes. Thank you for all the awesome and hilarious comments! Hopefully my novella helped clear some things up! 8)

hey op here, wow the things city people don't understand! First off, each and every calf must be vaccinated or they could become Ill.Second I wasn't in front of the calf, the person holding the calf let go of it unexpectedly

I do have a password! She makes me give it to her. Now I know why.. And to those asking I found out by waking up to her next to me on my phone, then quickly running out of my room