Cops and Miscellaneous: Whatcha do when they come for you? - FML

Whatcha do when they come for you?

By Anonymous - 22/01/2011 20:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend called me to pick her up from jail. She'd been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 920

You deserved it 4 389

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Thanks, I hate it

By ken - 19/07/2011 07:40 - Canada

Spicy

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is cheating on me when she was arrested for having sex in public. Not with me though. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 464

You deserved it 3 608

By Grandson - 01/01/2012 13:51 - Australia

Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 897

You deserved it 2 749

I'll just hang out I guess

By jailbirdlove - 11/10/2010 01:38 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 901

You deserved it 4 326

By single again - 06/09/2013 00:29 - United States - Chico

Today, I'm a police officer who had the honor of arresting my girlfriend of 3 months for prostitution. All of my coworkers at the station know her and won't stop giving me judging looks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 144

You deserved it 5 305

By Anonymous - 01/02/2012 15:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 652

You deserved it 4 852

Jailbird

By Donnie - 18/07/2019 06:00

Spicy

Today, I picked up a prostitute. The prostitute was my sister, and I picked her up from jail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 580

You deserved it 242

By DemCherries - 28/03/2017 15:00 - United States - Overland Park

Spicy

Today, at my job as a police officer, I had to arrest my own girlfriend for having sex at Walmart. She tried to get me to let her out on the grounds of being "pretty" and dating me. She wants to continue the relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 315

You deserved it 570

Smooth criminal

By nickim756 - 13/09/2010 02:29 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend saying he needed me to bail him out of jail. The crime? Masturbating in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 554

You deserved it 6 242

Bad boys bad boys

By addie - 03/03/2013 08:27 - United States

Today, my fiancé called me as I was clocking out. I thought he was going to tell me that he was waiting outside. Instead, he told me that he's getting arrested and needs me to call his mom for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 254

You deserved it 3 080

Caught

By fuck - 09/11/2013 23:30 - United States - Hubert

Spicy

Today, I got a call from my husband asking me to bail him out from jail. He was arrested after being caught having sex with a waitress in a restaurant bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 470

You deserved it 5 285

Next

Top comments

rawrkittehpwnage 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 1:36

sounds like you got yourself a keeper there.

AlexBuda 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 2:33

You have a **** as a girlfriend, time to break up

Comments

treehugger1991 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 6:38

It's better than public fornication

lovestoomassage 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 6:46

wow time to have a long talk! lol

ahriel 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 7:03

or that she gets paid for it... LOL

melissa_10 7

Sunday 23 January 2011 7:06

hey after a few drinks, shit happens:)lol

Jester7 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 7:51

there's a story behind that, tell me please

hpfanfosho 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 8:12

are u dating my mom?

kweenbitch 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 8:18

depending on what state/county/borough/ect you may reside, indecent exposure can be almost anything; having a skirt too short, bending over and flashing by mistake, even by a male not wearing a shirt. so get the **** off of those high horses you assholes rode in on and stop making such crude assumptions.

hashoahxxx 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 9:13

******* let her rot for awhile

null_fml 11

Sunday 23 January 2011 9:19

Don't worry about it; it wasn't her fault. See, she went skiing and she really had to pee...

anthony82_fml_fml 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 13:11

get a new girlfriend!

1
2
3
4
5
6

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Awkward Pokémon Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, I thought it was yesterday, I went to school for nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 461

You deserved it 75 162

Today, I was nearly T-Boned at a stop sign by my ex-roommate. I moved 10 miles away to get away from her after her midlife crisis, and her losing the house, and now avoid her end of town. She now works outside my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 771

You deserved it 143

Today, my dog was diagnosed with a torn ACL. This costs $1500-$2500 to treat. Three months ago, he had heart worms. That cost $1400 to treat. I adopted this dog from a shelter four months ago to help relieve some of my stress and anxiety. I don't feel any less stressed or anxious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 794

You deserved it 559

Today, my 14-year-old sister asked me how I felt when I first had sexual intercourse. I told her it was personal and was none of her business. She then looked at me and said, "I thought it was nice." I'm 19 and I'm still a virgin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 349

You deserved it 6 481

Today, I found my first grey hair. How? My boyfriend stopped in the middle of sex to point it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 308

You deserved it 3 885

Today, I found out two things about my new cat: One, he is afraid of thunder. Two, his reaction to hearing a loud thunderclap is to jump very high in the air with his claws extended, then run like hell. I discovered this when he jumped and landed right on my face. My face now looks like I smashed it into a window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 119