Health, Poopoo peepee, Weird Farts Trumpet solo

Trumpet solo

Churizmo - - United States

Today, I was at a party and I really had to use the bathroom. There were 30-40 people talking outside the door, so I thought it would be ok to make some noise. Just as I'm about to begin having explosive diarrhea, everyone fell silent as my dad began to pray for our meal. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

You OK in there?

stinkypants - 10/11/2011 03:15 - India

Today, I went to a dinner party. I had a bad stomach, so I made a dash to the bathroom and forgot to lock the door. While I was in, I heard some voices outside. In a panic, my reflex was to get up and lock the door. I did so, while simultaneously shitting all over myself. FML

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MisterBrown - 15/02/2010 07:08 - United States

Today, while at a family get together, my bowels suddenly decided they needed to be emptied. Straight away. I felt bad enough using someone else's bathroom for this, but later, my sister came in and loudly said "God, Brian, what the hell have you been eating?" in front of everyone at the get together. FML

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Amen

Anonymous - 22/06/2024 06:00 - United States

Today, apparently my bathroom breaks have perfect comedic timing. My very religious parents were praying in the living room. I quietly snuck into the bathroom that's less than ten yards from where they're at. Right as they finished praying and saying "Amen" I let off a massive fart, and my dad burst out laughing. FML

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Check her out

minnie - 28/08/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

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Bathroom break

Anonymous - 21/12/2010 02:31 - United States

Today, I had to go to the bathroom. I was in a rush, so I went into the boys bathroom. I then had diarrhea. The entire basketball team was waiting for me outside the stall. They did a slow clap for me. FML

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Symphony

Anonymous - 06/05/2009 19:17 - United States

Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML

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EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

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Leaked

Morgan Bailey - 18/09/2018 14:00

Today, I tried to let out a small fart in a crowded restaurant. I had diarrhea. I walked past several families to get to the bathroom and clean myself up, only to still go home with a huge wet spot down my ass. My shirt wasn't long enough to hide it. FML

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ugh - 03/09/2013 23:53 - United States - Lancaster

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

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shroooms - 28/07/2011 20:37 - Slovenia

Today, my entire family, myself included, has been turned into a collective diarrhea fountain after going out to eat. We only have one bathroom. FML

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marz88 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 23:34

Family Game of battle ***** GO GO!

geesquared 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 23:33

that is really embarassing. XD

CodeMan16 0

Monday 20 July 2009 1:53

kudos #28 and to OPs dad for praying before meals

AmpulexCompressa 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:00

How is this an FML? You officially win at everything now.

Hjelloo 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:00

Pray for your meal? Whackjob religious nuts.

curryndricegirll 0

Monday 20 July 2009 4:07

you're an idiot. you'll understand when you can't find any food to eat

littlemuffet 0

Monday 20 July 2009 8:59

Right. Prayer ALWAYS brings about good things. Especially food.

timtam24 0

Monday 20 July 2009 14:07

no it doesn't

littlemuffet 0

Tuesday 21 July 2009 9:50

Sarcasm.

kellster 2

Monday 20 July 2009 2:26

That REALLY sucks!

NobodyUKnow 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:26

ROFLMAO!

littlemuffet 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:35

Christianity is embarrassing.

curryndricegirll 0

Monday 20 July 2009 4:06

because you have to be Christian to pray?

littlemuffet 0

Monday 20 July 2009 9:03

No, but they're the most embarrassing.

80sinthe90s 0

Monday 20 July 2009 2:37

um wow guys, why does it matter that he was praying? what's wrong with that? why is it okay for you to insult Christians? and OP - that really does suck, I'm sorry haha