Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend told me that out of all my friends, I have... - FML

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By ItsGoneForever - 29/04/2016 22:19 - Netherlands - Driehuis

Today, my girlfriend told me that out of all my friends, I have the smallest penis. FML

agreeclassic 156

vote type 1 15

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darkslayer15964 5

Sunday 1 May 2016 3:46

******* leave her bro, obviously she is cheating on you or cheated, or messed around with your friends. Take it from a guy who got cheated on twice. She isn't worth it.

joshklander 11

Sunday 1 May 2016 21:07

Yah, she sounds like a real winner alright. I would dump her immediately. And besides, it's not about the size, it's about whether or not you know how to use it.

Comments

darkslayer15964 5

Sunday 1 May 2016 3:46

******* leave her bro, obviously she is cheating on you or cheated, or messed around with your friends. Take it from a guy who got cheated on twice. She isn't worth it.

joshklander 11

Sunday 1 May 2016 21:07

Yah, she sounds like a real winner alright. I would dump her immediately. And besides, it's not about the size, it's about whether or not you know how to use it.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I once again woke up to find a huge gash on the back of my foot with blood pouring out. Turns out, I scratched it with my other toenail in my sleep. This is the ninth time this has happened. FML

agreeclassic 390

vote type 1 1 211

Today, I was in church. During the prayer, I moved my foot and it pressed against the automatic button on my umbrella causing it to suddenly open. As if that wasn't bad enough, I screamed simultaneously at the shock. FML

agreeclassic 22 043

vote type 1 3 427

Today, I stretched out my wedding dress on my bed so it could air out before the big day tomorrow. Later I returned to my room only to find my cat on my wedding dress, it peed on it. FML

agreeclassic 64 318

vote type 1 20 336

Today, I was driving my dad, who recently turned 50, to the store and had to listen to him go on and on that he’s having to accept that, as my siblings and I get older and are more independent, he’s having to transition from "sex god to just a dad." I don't know either. FML

agreeclassic 2 058

vote type 1 209

Today, while on my run, I saw a middle-aged man sleeping near a business condo. I approached him and asked if he was "ok." He grabbed my leg, held onto it with a death-grip, and moped about how horrible his life was - for ten minutes. At least the weather was nice. FML

agreeclassic 29 837

vote type 1 8 967

Today, imagine you’re trying to be conscious about your spending habits, but you’re sad and so you decide to buy food, even though you have food at the house, then you eat it, enjoy it… then throw it all up. FML

agreeclassic 188

vote type 1 344