Miscellaneous: Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking...

By Anonymous - 30/05/2015 03:07 - United States - Salem

Today, my crazy neighbor screamed at me from her porch for walking "too close" to her plants. I was on the sidewalk. She sprayed me with her hose anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 639

You deserved it 2 119

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Same thing different taste

Piss off

By Anonymous - 02/05/2023 12:00

Today, I had to deal with my crazy new neighbour who tried to physically stop me from laying my new driveway, on my property, because she claimed she’s allergic to cement while it’s still wet. Even if that were true, piss off back to your house away from the wet cement then. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 026

You deserved it 100

Walked into her trap

By yikes - 18/03/2023 10:00

Today, I learned the VERY hard way that if you’re gonna go onto your neighbor’s property, yell at them for parking on your side of the street, and threaten to call the city on them, then you should probably make sure she doesn’t have pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 158

You deserved it 1 752

Don't mind me

By Anonymous - 16/04/2012 12:38 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 028

You deserved it 3 399

Creepy Susan

By pretty_coin - 23/10/2011 01:02 - Australia

Today, I'm hiding in my own house, because my crazy neighbor wants to "play." Yesterday when I agreed, she made me spend the whole day with her, then burst into tears when I had to leave. She's been waiting outside for over two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 348

You deserved it 3 580

By inyobeddd - 02/05/2013 08:27 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, my crazy neighbor came up to me in the street and slapped me across the face, accusing me of leering through her restroom window while she showered. I'm gay. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 943

You deserved it 6 725

Karen of the day

By Anonymous - 21/11/2024 06:00 - United States - Lafayette

Today, my ultra-Christian neighbor called the cops on me (again). This time, it was because she could smell "weed" coming from my apartment. I was burning sage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 115

Cue Shaggy

By scully11 - 02/08/2011 18:36 - Canada

Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 383

You deserved it 3 379

Nice try, Susan

By Anonymous - 13/08/2025 23:00

Today, my neighbour is suing me because she got stung in the face by a wasp, a wasp that came from my garden into hers and stung her, therefore it must be my fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 65

By Cowan - 06/08/2009 12:27 - Belgium

Today, I had to come back home early from my holidays. Why? I had asked my grandmother to water my plants, some of which are illegal. Instead of doing it herself, she asked her neighbor… who is a cop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 869

You deserved it 125 427

By Murphs_Law - 16/11/2016 06:37 - United States

Today, my crazy downstairs neighbor was yet again fighting with her boyfriend by slamming every door. When this didn't work, she went downstairs to fight with his grill. She wheeled it to the end of the driveway and pushed it over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 160

You deserved it 813

FrutLoopDingus 19

Saturday 30 May 2015 19:45

You young whippersnappers shouldn't be that close anyways

thewcloner 22

Saturday 30 May 2015 19:45

Maybe they were killer plants?

Comments

flopstar 21

Saturday 30 May 2015 21:54

You should have slipped on to get plants, that'd show her!

Sportey 9

Saturday 30 May 2015 22:03

Lawyer up buddy.

fmlsams 27

Saturday 30 May 2015 22:42

Did you ask if one of the plants was named Audrey??

Dexter83_fml 17

Saturday 30 May 2015 22:56

Yell at her for being to close to the sidewalk

Uuuuxc 7

Saturday 30 May 2015 22:59

believe it or not, this constitutes assault and is a criminal act. Remind her next time she sprays you

ama9466 17

Saturday 30 May 2015 23:06

I would have knocked all her plants over after that.

iheartstupid 4

Saturday 30 May 2015 23:15

Neighbors are the worst. Mine called the cops on me once because I was vacuuming . . . at 4 in the afternoon.

Zebediabolical 40

Saturday 30 May 2015 23:32

Draw a giant dick on her lawn with miracle grow powder. When she hoses it off, well, in a couple weeks she'll have a neon green supergrass dick that will stand out against the rest of it.