dump him

sounds like mommy isn't ready to let go of her baby boy yet. she's still manipulating him and showing her power in the relationship. your bf has no balls and you'll end up with a mom-in-law problems.

So the ball drops - his mom is more important than you. Dump him.

Ugh, your life isn't effed. Unless of course a ring is more important than being engaged to the man you love. Sure, it sucks that you won't have the ring, but if his mom really needed the money, then I'm not seeing your marriage work out too well had you refused to give up the ring. "Sorry your mom's losing her house hon, but the girls just won't believe you proposed unless I have the rock on my finger. Oh, and no, she can't live with us."

Drop him. It's the beginning of a pattern. If his mother (and he) can so casually ask for a gift back (especially such a powerfully symbolic gift), then they don't have the same values you do. Any gift he ever gives you, is one he could simply ask to have back when his mother wishes it. There will always be something that requires money. He'll just approach your valuables and make a collection whenever there's a "need"...as if you are a bank account. lol - tip of the iceberg here, be glad of the warning sign and run now. I hope you gave him his ring back and calmly told him it was over.

That really ain't that bad...someone else needs that money more than u do right now and u should know by our economy how hard it is for a lot of ppl right now. I'm sure that u will get a new (maybe even better) ring when he is able to..and u should like the fact that he cares so much about his mom and family and is so selfless. This does not deserve to be a FML.

You're not going to die because you don't have an expensive ring... I mean, seriously? It's a waste of money and perhaps his mother actually NEEDED help. I doubt he gave her the money so that she could go buy jewelry. I would hope that being engaged to someone you love would be more important than shiny finger decorations anyway.

Everyone keeps saying "but she raised him!" and we don't know that. It could very easily be a case where mom wasn't around much when he was growing up and now he tries to please her. When he called her to tell her his good news, she ignored his good news and, in the self centered way a lot of absent parents do, brought the conversation back to her and her woes. I suspect that she roundaboutly proded at the son until he offered her the ring. He put his mother before his fiancee and that isn't right. In asking the OP to marry him, he's making her a part of his family, too. That being said, the OP should not give up her ring. Its not about being materialistic, its about creating boundaries and being able to say "no, this is my moment, I'm the important one here." Call it selfish, but if she doesn't establish that she's on an equal playing field with his mother now, she won't ever be.

I have seen to many mother in laws who would only bring up some debt they owed when there son says he wants to get married. Seriously what a biotch for bringing it up right then. If she really needed help she wouldn't of waited til announcing they were getting married. It was incredibly rude of her to do and incredibly rude of him to ask for it back instead of gently asking her if they could find some way to help his mother and the reasons behind it.

It's REALLY funny the way you can tell a lot about people by what they post.. all of the mothers are saying what a sweet son.. and all the single ladies are like, wtf?... give the ring back?!? haha.... 1. Girls, never ever, ever, ever, ever, ever give a ring back.. not for anything.. it's yours; keep it!! (selling it after a divorce to get the money is a different story) 2. Stupid, annoying, cuddling mothers... let the **** go! if he's old enough to earn enough money to buy someone an engagement ring, then back the **** off! I'm guessing in this scenario the mother probably didn't know about the engagement and was enraged that he had the audacity to make a big-boy decision w/out her consent, so she pulled a guilt trip (that always works, right!?) and made him get the ring back w/out saying to do so...so that it was actually his doings, not hers, so she can't be blamed later.. her doing that to this girl RUINED her engagement!!! ENGAGEMENT is one the the BIGGEST moments!! Like some have said before me...if he is willing to do that to you for his mother, he will always put you after her...you don't deserve that...tell him, you're glad this came up, because you don't think you want to anyways.... then find you a real man who puts his woman first!! I'm not saying guys that don't care about their families are good, i'm saying that a real man needs to know where his loyalties lie.. if it's w/ mommy, then he shouldn't ever get married. seriously, dump that needle-dick asshole!