By friend loves a gay guy... - 23/09/2013 20:49 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my best friend told me that she no longer wants to cut herself because now she's madly in love with a guy in our school. She doesn't know that he's gay. FML
I agree, your life sucks 57 222
You deserved it 3 923

Same thing different taste

Top comments

Better to break the news to her now over Ben and Jerry's and romantic comedies rather than have her figure it out alone.That's what best friends are for; there for the good, bad and ugly.

That's a terrible thing to say! Do you even know what emotional trauma people go through which leads them to cut? I am personally very happy that she's stopped, and I am sure her friend will be able to help her in this situation.

Comments

Introduce her to a very nice and charming guy especially one who has the same interests as her. She'll thank you for it. :)

iGottaFindBubbah 12

She needs to learn how to cope before finding love, otherwise she'll just hurt herself when something goes wrong.

Ah, perfect guys are just so easy to find around every corner. Introducing her to someone is great after op gets help for her friend. Most people don't kick cutting on their own and a new relationship will only put it on hold until the mental health issue that causes it flares up again. Each episode gets worse without help.

Well, her heart/love is about to bleed even more...

yenze 18

a boy shouldn't be the only reason she doesn't hurt herself

That is exactly what I was thinking. If that is the ONLY reason she is quitting, it seems like she was only cutting for attention not because she suffers from some emotional issues. But either way, at least she is trying to stop, who am I to judge, right?

But isn't that what cutting is about anyway? For attention?

yenze 18

I am not one to judge either what I was trying to get at is she needs to want to stop for herself and not let other effect her so much. I would also like to say that I think Op is an amazing friend because Op is saying **** her own life because her friend is hurting herself

You could be wrong with your thinking that she's only doing it for attention. I used to stop when I was dating people because I didn't want anyone to know I was cutting and see the fresh marks on my thighs or chest. As soon as the relationship was over I'd go right back too it. I'd also stop when I had a doctor appointment coming up, just in case. When I was younger I never scarred, so I didn't have those to worry about I only had to worry about the fresh cuts. Op's friend could be thinking something similar. She could not want anyone but Op to know.

EnchantedKitten 16

It doesn't matter why she's cutting, for distraction or attention, it's a problem she's cutting. It's no less self injury if she's asking for attention, because that means she wants help but doesn't know how to ask for it without hurting herself.

That would be pretty cool if she were able to straighten him up and they start dating.

can a guy "gay up" a straight boy? probably not. a girl cant "straighten up" a guy either. As my father says "If they dont like Pussy, you will never get them off Dick". He is a sweet yet vulgar man.

If she doesn't know he's gay, she's not close enough to him to be madly in love with him. Maybe she thinks she is; but you should probably explain in a nice manner that genuine love and puppy love are two different things. And probably tell her that he's gay before she gets more attached. It's only be worse if she finds out later. Try to get her to stop cutting herself some other way, or convince her to try going to therapy or finding help in general.

Gingerette 8

In fact, turn her to a different guy. Tell her "yeah, that guy's great, but check out this one." It can't really hurt to try to divert her attention to a less painful path.

ulissey_fml 22

Let it be . If he's a nice guy, he'll end up being a good friend to her. If he does not care, she'll find it soon enough . Give her advice when she asks for it, be supportive , that's what friends are for. As for trying to warn her...interfering with people's crushes rarely proves to be a good idea. Most time people resent the help offered and blame you for the unhappy outcome.

If you were truly her best friend, you would try to steer her away from cutting.

Who said they haven't? because I sure as hell didn't see anywhere that he/she hasn't tried to help steer her away from it.

One of my best friend cuts a lot and no matter what I do to convince her not to she still does it. Sometimes there isn't a thing you can do

just make sure you stay there for her because even though she may not stop cutting,that doesn't mean she doesn't want to stop,and she probably really needs you even if she pushes you away.

Tell her family about her suicidal thoughts , they may be able to help out a little. This is serious stuff

Cutting may lead to suicide but not always. If you inform her family, be specific. Cutting is not a suicide attempt; it is a misguided way to relieve stress and feel in control. Honestly, Op, I would hate to be in your shoes. Dealing with a friend who is emotionally unstable is difficult. Telling her parents may be the best alternative.

sourgirl101 28

You are correct in many cases. Unfortunately my son went through that cutting stage. To him it was the trend. When I found out, my husband and I took him to counseling. The counselor assured us that everything would be fine and that he wasn't trying to kill himself because he used his right hand (he's right-handed) to do the cutting. Apparently that meant he wasn't cutting carelessly. He's since stopped but has deep scars that are very visible when he wears short sleeves. I'm grateful I at least found out earlier or those scars would have been more.

I'd say shes madly about a lot of things