Kids: Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any... - FML

By Anonymous - 11/01/2012 20:08 - United Arab Emirates

Today, my 18 year old son asked me to check if there were any monsters under his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 371

You deserved it 7 503

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Same thing different taste

Freaked out

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, my son was crying and refusing to sleep in his room because a spider ran along the wall, and it's now hiding somewhere. He’s 19. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 019

You deserved it 543

Beware!

By Anonymous - 24/11/2011 17:07 - United States

Today, my son told me he was afraid of monsters under his bed. When I poked my head under to show him nothing was there, the family cat sprang out and clawed me in the face. Now I have a gash on my chin, and my son refuses to go anywhere near his bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 129

You deserved it 3 836

By tony - 24/07/2009 07:04 - United States

Today, I discovered my 18 year old son has been peeing on the carpet when he is too lazy to get out of bed in the morning and blaming it on the cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 617

You deserved it 7 678

Wild child

By Anonymous - 29/08/2025 14:00 - United States - Newport News

Today, my wife asked our 17 year-old son to clean his room. Following up, he lied to his mom and said it was clean. After rechecking his room, he began to throw things and I returned to find holes punched in the walls. I went and patched the holes, after which he immediately kicked more holes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 445

By Anonymous - 20/10/2012 08:42 - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I was woken up by my teenage son pulling down my shirt and taking pictures of my breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 038

You deserved it 3 377

By Anonyme - 06/09/2013 11:56 - France - Caen

Today, my 17-year-old son hacked off the legs of his bed with a saw. His explanation? "The bed looks cooler closer to the floor." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 581

You deserved it 5 001

By female - 31/12/2018 20:00

Today, my nineteen-year-old son attempted to mug me. With a screwdriver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 918

You deserved it 372

Shame! Shaaaame!

By poormomma - 15/04/2020 08:00

Today, I found out my son kept quiet about having head lice for a week. He's 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 673

You deserved it 265

By animelover - 25/07/2010 23:21 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend came over while I was babysitting my little brother. He wouldn't stay in bed, so my boyfriend told him,"If you don't stay in bed, the monster will eat you!" I now have to wash my brother's bedsheets, because he was too afraid to get up and go pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 702

You deserved it 10 831

Boundaries

By Alock - 08/09/2024 00:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, my son climbed into our bed because he'd had a nightmare. He and my wife spent hours whispering and giggling like they were at a slumber party. Cute, until the next morning, when they were both tired, grumpy, and uncooperative. FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 99

Next

Top comments

Outsider_77 0

Thursday 12 January 2012 0:22

Did you find any?

unoffensivename 0

Thursday 12 January 2012 0:24

What if you find any, also did he just play amnesia dark descent because then its understandable

Comments

jroxursox1 10

Thursday 12 January 2012 4:55

That's where you say holy shit there is!! And if you misbehave again. *pause for suspense * he'll eat you.

SabyLuvsYuu 1

Thursday 12 January 2012 4:58

Is this the same son who asked if his mom was a virgin?

day624 14

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:33

Lmao thats what i was thinking

Amrel 10

Thursday 12 January 2012 4:59

I also am not a great photo shopper i just like to mess with it that all, dont expect it to be great and yea i know you wont use as your profile pic i just wanted permission

MigraineurOfLife 15

Thursday 12 January 2012 4:59

Wow! At 18yo... Really? O_o

krazieslife 7

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:01

Oh that's weird

kalibooboo 14

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:04

Haha that sounds like me after I watch a scary movie....except I make my boyfriend look

Duck_Goose33 3

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:18

I don't blame him. Monsters are serious shit.

Alphabake 3

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:24

He may be worrying about sth, or sths troubling him!

day624 14

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:29

There truly arent words to describe how im feeling about this post, sorry

calipilot227 16

Thursday 12 January 2012 5:31

Cocaine's a hell of a drug... (seriously, it'll make anyone paranoid)

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The Top

The Top

Today, I was eating some cake that my roommate's girlfriend brought by for us. I felt something weird in my mouth, so I stopped chewing to grab it. It was a fingernail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 989

You deserved it 67

Today, I tried to convince my daughter that the "To boldly go where no man has gone before" speech is from Star Trek, and is not an actual historical speech by the first man on the moon. She has decided to include it in her university essay on Neil Armstrong anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 880

You deserved it 3 427

Today, my assmunch neighbor snitched on me and told my wife I was bringing my girlfriend home to sleep over while she worked her job during the graveyard shift. All because I’d forgotten to return his lawnmower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 4 588

Today, while standing in line at the supermarket, I reached past my wife to get a pack of gum. She jokingly did the "battered wife flinch" to get a laugh, and smiled at me from behind her hand. The cop staring at us obviously didn't notice the smile and definitely didn't think it was funny. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 298

You deserved it 4 231

Who else is ready to take a personal day with this dog?

I agree, your life sucks 503

You deserved it 119

Today, I had a very important test. Last night, I'd had such bad leg pains that I couldn't sleep, so I took two very strong painkillers and went to sleep pain-free. I apparently accidentally overdosed, because when I woke up, I couldn't see properly or even stand up. And I missed my test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 084

You deserved it 8 730