Intimacy: Today, making love with my girlfriend, I decide to try a "long... - FML

This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By Rainman123 - 22/07/2016 09:10 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, making love with my girlfriend, I decide to try a "long lasting" condom... Actually just ended up making my penis numb. So I tried again like 20 minutes later and it was great the second time!...Until my girlfriend got bored two minutes later because her vagina was completely numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 31

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Top comments

countryb_cth 38

Saturday 23 July 2016 9:35

You do realize out of the billions of people in the world this situation could happen to more than one person? Maybe next time think about that before calling someone a dipshit and making an ass out of yourself.

Tmlord 3

Saturday 23 July 2016 19:36

Yeah, this is stolen, and it wasn't even said correctly, he didn't say that he put it inside out so it made her numb...

Comments

epicgamer 18

Saturday 23 July 2016 5:13

I saw this on youtube years ago. Be original for once dipshit.

countryb_cth 38

Saturday 23 July 2016 9:35

You do realize out of the billions of people in the world this situation could happen to more than one person? Maybe next time think about that before calling someone a dipshit and making an ass out of yourself.

Tmlord 3

Saturday 23 July 2016 19:36

Yeah, this is stolen, and it wasn't even said correctly, he didn't say that he put it inside out so it made her numb...

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, my husband used the vacuum cleaner. Proud of him for this first-ever initiative, I congratulated him. His second initiative was to stick the nozzle on my ass, yelling, "Liposuction!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 028

You deserved it 5 582

Today, I volunteered at a nursing home. I approached a lonely, old man who had a type of nervous tick. I went over to speak to him, and not even four sentences into our conversation he says, "I'd really like to make love to you." What I thought was a tick was actually him stroking himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 582

You deserved it 4 571

Today, some asshat thought it would be funny to put a second lock on my locker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 623

You deserved it 156

Today, I got back to work. Last week, my divorce was finalized and my last name is, once again, my maiden name. Since I'm a teacher, all my students will remember me by my ex-husband's last name. I get to be reminded every day that my marriage failed until everyone memorizes my maiden name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 115

You deserved it 4 098

Today, I joined a work call feeling confident, until my chair slowly sank mid-meeting. I tried to discreetly readjust, but the chair hissed and dropped me two inches every few seconds until only my eyes were visible above the desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 66

Today, it had rained and the marble steps outside my office were slicker than I expected. I was trying to navigate down them with a coffee cup in one hand and my phone in the other when I was startled by a notification, slipped, threw my coffee up in the air, and landed flat on my back. Of course there were spectators. FML

I agree, your life sucks 305

You deserved it 229