This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.
Today, I got home from the emergency room at 3:30 AM. I'm pregnant and after vomiting constantly for days, my midwife said I needed IV fluids. At the ER I got a stomach bug, and now have uncontrollable diarrhea. I sharted in my bed and got diarrhea on my sheets. My washing machine is broken. FML