This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.

By mohitoto - 10/07/2016 17:44

Today, a mosquito bit my junk, I'm allergic to mosquitoes, I can't masturbate for 5 months and my dick looks like a pool noodle. FML
I agree, your life sucks 484
You deserved it 46
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Top comments

ghostmelon 4

Who leaves their junk just chillin around

4 1
GhostFox 33

You should probably get an epi-pen. It sounds like your allergy is very close to becoming anaphylactic shock. As for the other bits- I would suggest heat or ice, whichever is more tolerable, to help with swelling and pain. Be sure to follow the rules for either- no more than twenty minutes at a time, etc.

2 0

Comments

gunner1579 25

Why exactly was your 'junk' available to be bitten?

3 2
ghostmelon 4

Who leaves their junk just chillin around

4 1
GhostFox 33

You should probably get an epi-pen. It sounds like your allergy is very close to becoming anaphylactic shock. As for the other bits- I would suggest heat or ice, whichever is more tolerable, to help with swelling and pain. Be sure to follow the rules for either- no more than twenty minutes at a time, etc.

2 0
stressedartist 14

Well at least you have a big dick now...? I'm sorry I'm trying to be positive

0 0