Sex, Contraception Intimacy Sounds more like a fetish…

Sounds more like a fetish…

Jordan - 08/04/2012 10:37 - Australia - Wahroonga

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Nice try, chief

Anonymous - 04/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

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The best method!

- 04/01/2020 18:00

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

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OwMyBalls - 12/02/2012 06:17

Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML

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what the fuck - 07/06/2013 21:20 - United Kingdom - Northolt

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to get intimate for the first time. He said he didn't want to use a condom, and that I should just give him one of my birth control pills instead, "so we can still be just as safe". What the hell? FML

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Username - 28/03/2011 05:26 - United States

Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML

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grizzlybear - 27/06/2011 05:55 - Mexico

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML

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Wild allegation

Anonymous - 30/06/2009 14:45 - United States

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend throwing my birth control box at me and shouting that I was a slut for cheating on him since we never had sex. I attempted to explain the birth control was for a condition I have that causes my period to be non-existent. He didn't believe me. FML

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Not a Bio major

Anonymous - 27/06/2011 13:55 - United States

Today, my boyfriend said that to be extra careful he's been taking my birth control pills too. FML

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go snope yourself - 26/01/2013 21:51 - United Kingdom

Today, I was debating which hurts more: child-birth or a kick to the testicles. Some guy spouted the old urban legend that a nut-kick is 9000 "dels", and giving birth is 57, so I proved that no such measurement of pain exists. His comeback was to sucker-punch me to the floor. FML

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Dodged a bullet

Anonymous - 18/11/2011 23:36 - United States

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading." FML

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deLongenator 4

Sunday 8 April 2012 16:08

Then kick him hard!

HolaJessicaHola 0

Sunday 8 April 2012 16:09

Kick hard. Tell him "we want to be sure, right?"

bigdude1302 2

Sunday 8 April 2012 20:57

Just for saying that u should kick him in the balls.

reckless11 0

Sunday 8 April 2012 21:11

Try a sledge that might work a little bit better or just use a ****** condom

BellaMarta 19

Sunday 8 April 2012 21:25

If there's a LOT of force...then yeah, he's right.

bizarre_ftw 21

Sunday 8 April 2012 21:35

Have fun with that

iceprice 7

Sunday 8 April 2012 21:37

Hey it will work nd he will b the one moaning...

amazinglyweird 1

Sunday 8 April 2012 21:41

haha...he is kinda gay..trust me :-D

pastnastificatio 4

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:01

Proven, yes. Scientifically, no

emdawg15 4

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:02

Yeah it is.. If you never ever want to conceive in your life.

fenixtorador1 11

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:13

He's a keeper

ImafukNskittleYO 4

Sunday 8 April 2012 22:31

@80: I'm sure a man said that. That theory is full of shit.

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I had to clean my boyfriend's puke off of our bed. Last night he ditched me to go out partying, came home, threw up, and passed out. He thinks it's only fair I clean up today because he's "not feeling well". FML

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Today, I had an allergic reaction to my deodorant. My armpits wouldn't stop itching, and by the time my shift was over, they were raw and bloody. FML

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Today, I learned that the hardest part of marrying a historian is choosing baby names. His top choices derive from two Roman magistrates, two abbesses, a tenth-century author, and an obscure Greek official. I already let him name our pug, for whom he chose the name "Tertullianus." FML

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Today, I helped a man with a neck brace get on the bus. I fell asleep, only to wake up later on to him gratuitously stroking my breasts with his elbow. FML

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Today, I tried to encourage my spouse to come with me and work out a bit, figuring it would help us both get be healthier and be something to do together. I got told she had no desire to get healthy or look attractive, and that I should find a "Fuck buddy" instead. What? FML

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Today, my parents got me a new computer for my birthday. They also took the liberty of throwing out my old computer, with 8 years of photos, videos, music, documents, emails, and bookmarks on it. But that's okay, I had a backup. They threw that out too. FML

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