Puddle Jumper By FML Videos - 28/11/2018 18:30 - United States - New York Close but no cigar! I agree, your life sucks 260 You deserved it 67 Share Tweet Share
Today, I realized my recent weight loss probably wasn't caused by working out and eating more healthily. It was from the tapeworm I discovered hanging out my ass after I took a crap. I had to pull it out with my bare hands. FML I agree, your life sucks 18 602 You deserved it 4 087
Today, I was under a building overhang to avoid getting drenched by the rain while waiting for the bus. Apparently that corner is notorious for drug dealing, I found this out when a man angrily demanded his drugs and chased me half a block. FML I agree, your life sucks 33 672 You deserved it 3 412
Today, my girlfriend was getting up to leave and I, trying to be romantic, got up behind her and tried to swing her back down onto the bed and kiss her simultaneously, misjudged the distance and threw her into the wall, her head then bounced off the wall and into my forehead, spraining her nose. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 510 You deserved it 27 012
Today, my mom was proud for making a positive change in her life. The change in question? She now throws away the smelly hair she combs out of the dog, instead of keeping it for unspecified later use. FML I agree, your life sucks 845 You deserved it 64
Today, my date cried because his mom recently died. Of course, I was sympathetic because I'm a nice person, but he tried to leverage my sympathy into a blowjob in the restaurant toilet. Since we "obviously weren't going to work as a real couple", it was apparently "the least I could do to make him feel better." Creep. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 488 You deserved it 209
Today, because now Twitter shows the "For you" section automatically, the first thing I saw was some guy saying childless women are useless and pathetic. I wanted kids but had a hysterectomy because I was developing cancer. Seeing that brought back the pain and made me feel like crap. FML I agree, your life sucks 525 You deserved it 116