Intimacy: PUA

PUA

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 16:16 - United States - Smyrna

Today, while jogging in the park, a confused elderly gentleman asked me for directions, so I told him how to get to where he needed to go. He paused for a long moment, then asked me if he could eat me out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 388

You deserved it 2 248

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Same thing different taste

By SpongeAbii2 - 24/01/2012 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I was walking home when an old guy came up to me asking for directions. After I pointed him in the right direction, he held my hand, stroked my face then pushed me into a bush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 775

You deserved it 2 981

By Anonymous - 12/01/2011 05:31 - Canada

Today, I was walking down the street and I saw an old man, and me feeling nice I asked him if I could help him cross the street. He responded with: "Only if you let me touch your tits." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 267

You deserved it 6 627

By sammy18f - 24/02/2015 03:46 - United States - Brentwood

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 146

You deserved it 3 789

By ohman - 17/07/2009 17:29 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 285

You deserved it 8 194

By Jake - 29/04/2009 08:06 - Australia

Today, as I was taking an evening jog around my neighbourhood, I passed an elderly woman. I grinned at her as sign of friendliness to a common pedestrian. She grinned back. Whilst staring at my crotch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 116

You deserved it 6 233

By mjperfetti84 - 22/11/2009 13:53 - United States

Today, I helped an old man with his groceries, because he was struggling and he had a cane. After, I was nice enough to drive him home. He went to thank me by giving me a kiss on the cheek. Then he stuck his tongue out, and tried to French kiss me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 510

You deserved it 6 182

Stranger danger

By Anonymous - 11/06/2015 21:20 - United States - Helena

Today, I was talking to an old man I met at a store. He just wanted to know a few things, and he asked about my day. I explained a few bad things that'd happened, then I thanked him for listening. He then asked, "So, how are we gonna do this?" He thought we were gonna fuck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 963

You deserved it 3 365

By Anonymous - 04/08/2019 00:01

Today, as I was jogging on the boardwalk, an old guy tripped me with his cane. As I was getting back up, I heard him say to his wife, "I wanted to see if she would actually fall." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 979

You deserved it 133

By speechless - 01/06/2013 00:50 - United Kingdom - Wallasey

Today, at the supermarket, an old lady asked for directions to the produce aisle. Having read way too many stories lately on this very site about awful elderly folks, I was wary, but helped her out. She gave me an awkward hug in thanks, lifting my wallet in the process, as I later found out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 134

You deserved it 6 095

By meesmees - 23/11/2013 10:48 - United States - Severna Park

Today, I ended up talking to a homeless man and bought him a meal. In return, he hugged me and groped my ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 829

You deserved it 6 815

MisterEx 28

Monday 14 March 2016 0:41

The directions you gave him were too long. He wanted a shortcut. To between your legs.

Zarcissa 34

Monday 14 March 2016 0:40

Yikes, it's always creepy when someone old enough to be your grandparent suggests things like this.

Comments

trojanman74 6

Monday 14 March 2016 1:06

Did you check to see if he was a zombie. Walking dead is on tonight!!!

j4ckpf 12

Monday 14 March 2016 1:13

It's just a prank, bro.

SecundusSecunda 27

Monday 14 March 2016 1:17

Directions too hard to follow Dick stuck in park bench

SomewhatNuts 19

Monday 14 March 2016 6:38

hahaha this had me giggling like a school girl. Thanks for the laugh...definitely needed that

TheNewGuy03 28

Monday 14 March 2016 17:34

I'm suffering a minor myocardial infarction. Thanks, 18

ButtStallion2k16 10

Monday 14 March 2016 1:27

You go, grandpa!

iiTzNeeNerz 26

Monday 14 March 2016 1:29

That brain to mouth filter on these elderly really needs to get fixed.

The_ghetto_mango 25

Thursday 17 March 2016 14:02

Elderly people don't give a shit anymore. They're like "**** this shit. ******* people. ******* earth. Back in 1945, I could get a decent meal for less than 5 ******* bucks. Slow down, you ******* child!"