Me at lunchtime By Lewis - 12/12/2018 00:30 Why have I to be polite? I agree, your life sucks 266 You deserved it 64 Share Tweet Share
Today, there was an issue with the sewage system at work. It smelled like somebody took a turd, left it in the sun to marinate, threw up on it, then put in the air conditioning to fill the store with nauseating stink. I nearly threw up multiple times because we weren't allowed to leave early. FML I agree, your life sucks 20 327 You deserved it 1 393
Today, I saw a woman breastfeeding at the natural foods market. It's the first time I've seen a woman's nipple in over two years. I've been married for ten. FML I agree, your life sucks 62 683 You deserved it 7 506
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 414 You deserved it 166
Today, I'm pretty sure my husband of 8 years is sleeping with the skank who's in the fire department with him. Out of nowhere, he started texting her and wouldn’t come home until 12:30 a.m. for a whole week. When I confronted him about it, he flipped out. Sadly, it won’t be the first marriage she’s ruined. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 300 You deserved it 200
Today, my boyfriend tried to use the “It’s my birthday” excuse to get access to my booty hole. Last time he used the “My favourite aunt died” excuse, and before that, the night of our fourth date, he used the “I’m drunk and can’t find the right hole” excuse. Take the hint, no means never. FML I agree, your life sucks 719 You deserved it 294
Today, my husband turned down a six figure job offer because he thinks it will be too difficult to learn to speak German. German is my native language, he already speaks some German from being married to me for 16 years, but somehow becoming fully fluent isn’t worth 6 figures to him. FML I agree, your life sucks 524 You deserved it 116