Lifeless

By Motionless - 26/05/2011 09:55 - United States

Spicy
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend. This is the seventh time in a row that she hasn't moved or made any noises the entire way through. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 112
You deserved it 23 805
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Top comments

kg163401 0

I dub thee corpse ******

612 19
yazah 0

Try deflating her and then blowing her back up. :)

252 2

Comments

thatnucca 36

The perfect definition of a lousy lay... Be positive! At least she didn't ask for the comic section newspaper while you were at it... Ask her for help...

9 12
NYC_Yoshi 3

good relationships require communication. you should have said something to her the 1st time instead of waiting for the 7th and coming to us instead. YDI.

64 2
jweezy89 4

Well he came to her atleast 7 times, if you know what I mean. ;-)

1 4
emtae6307 4

You are doing something wrong dude.

21 3
Senseisparky 0

Why are you counting the times you gave her a lousy lay? Shes plotting her exit strategy.

29 3
billywhhaatt 5

or she's dead an he should sorting out a plot for her.

10 2
TheDrifter 23

Or he's overdoing the chloroform and she's just unconscious.

2 0
LolMoqz 10

yeah dude. Somethings wrong here.

5 3
hockeyrocks39 0

It takes a while to get a girls parts all warmed up and excited. Are you warming things up first or just slam bam thank you mam?

47 2
Badshah29 6

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
5 52
bentleysdad11611 0

your the dumbest ****** on here next time just don't say anything man sound alot smarter

13 3
Badshah29 6

Yah? And have u looked at ur gfs face with ur glasses on? I'd rather do a mouse!

2 15
Badshah29 6

besides if i stayed silent, how wud i "sound" smarter? guess dat shows how bright u r, ********

1 13
IndigoFuckYou 9

Dude. Rule one of any Internet site, ever. don't diss a man's girl. No. plus, she's not bad looking, you're just a shallow prick. And you would seem smarter if you kept your mouth shut because everything that you say seems to be pure verbal stupidity.

12 1
KiddNYC1O 20

45- It's "You're" or "You are". In your face!

1 1
DjeePee 24

Let me guess, this was also the seventh time in a row that you just continued having sex with an obviously not interested person. Com-mu-ni-ca-tion. Think about it.

31 1
B0nb0N09 12

Communication- otherwise known and seeking consent. Sounds like he missed a rather important bit of the process there

3 0