Sex, Pranks and Intimacy: Keep us posted

Keep us posted

By suxx - 25/06/2011 08:39 - United States

Today, I walked around for hours with a Post-it on my back reading, "I JUST HAD SEX!" My boyfriend stuck it on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 772

You deserved it 8 229

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Same thing different taste

Gettin' some

By Username - 01/05/2011 08:20 - United States

Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 515

You deserved it 46 435

By rplovez - 05/09/2011 23:14 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me by covering my car with post-it notes that read "it's you not me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 325

You deserved it 4 029

Go-faster stripes

By Anonymous - 25/08/2022 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. We kept the lights on for a change and he asked me, "Babe, what's that on your tummy?" They're my stretch marks. Sex and body confidence ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 187

You deserved it 233

Life's a beach

By Brittanyy_leigh - 17/12/2009 07:57 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I went to the beach. I though he was being really sweet by putting sunscreen on my back as I layed on my stomach. I got home later, and felt that my back was sore. Then I saw the giant penis on my back that been burnt in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 173

You deserved it 6 022

By besviken - 18/11/2012 22:53 - Sweden - Uppsala

Today, I had the best sex of our relationship with my boyfriend. Afterwards, he took off his condom, looked me sweetly in the eyes for a few moments, then decided to slap me in the face with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 486

You deserved it 6 337

Bored stiff

By RJB - 29/07/2011 02:48 - United States

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, I got so bored, I made a "to do" list for the week in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 110

You deserved it 12 629

By mylifesucks - 31/01/2014 23:50 - France - Paris

Today, my girlfriend and I made love. She stared at her One Direction poster the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 363

You deserved it 12 693

Stuck on you

By Anonymous - 10/02/2025 15:00 - United States - Kansas City

Today, I put on a new pair of jeans and went out. Halfway through my errands, I realized the long sticker with my size was still on the back. I walked around for quite a while advertising my embarrassing waist and leg measurements. FML

I agree, your life sucks 212

You deserved it 327

By Anonymous - 15/03/2010 19:34 - United States

Today, I was in a movie when my boyfriend sent out a mass text saying that he'd just lost his virginity. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 438

You deserved it 4 271

By Crashburn - 16/01/2012 11:09 - United Kingdom

Today, after having a naked wrestle with my boyfriend, I discovered he'd left a skidmark on my stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 881

You deserved it 15 393

mojojojo91 6

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:01

Did it feel so good?

FUUUandyourmom 16

Saturday 25 June 2011 16:00

What an amazing boyfriend you've got there!

Comments

asoptavlo14 6

Saturday 25 June 2011 18:25

what'd it say?

PandaPandy 6

Saturday 25 June 2011 18:46

I just got the song "I just had sex" in my head. ohoho the lonely island. that's sad. I wonder what people thought.

eminemchick 19

Saturday 25 June 2011 18:47

88 it said "not if she stayed in the kitchen like she was supposed to!" D:

TheRealTallGuy 3

Saturday 25 June 2011 18:48

he's a keeper

mismonroe 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 18:57

This whole thread is just one big song reference.

StrangerDangerr 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:06

stick one on him saying I lost my virginity!

Aim4thebullseye 4

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:43

No it should be "I just lost my virginity to my mom"

fijisoccer15 4

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:08

he was dedicating it to you for letting him flop around on top of you!

detective_oreo 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:24

cute!

whitesox365 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:41

why was that moderated? seriously

jasminea 0

Saturday 25 June 2011 19:44

I just had sex, and it felt so good when I put my penis insiiidee of her(;

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me the sauce he made for our dinner that was meat-based, trying to show me how nice meat is and stop me being a weirdo vegan. The reason I’m vegan is because my digestive system can’t handle animal protein. I’m writing this from the bathroom, vomiting myself to death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 444

You deserved it 182

Today, I tried to create the perfect playlist for a road trip. I spent a long while curating it, but when I hit the shuffle button, it started playing a bunch of annoying nursery rhymes. Apparently, I'd accidentally merged my list with my nephew's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 356

You deserved it 218

Today, after two failed long-distance relationships, I was so happy to finally meet a local guy I really liked. After an amazing date, he shared that he'll be moving to the exact opposite side of the country in two weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 136

You deserved it 203

Today, I'm getting ready to move and so I woke up early to get a bunch of trash to put out. For months our pickup has been so late, it usually happens the next day. Today they came at 6:30 AM, while I was in the bathroom. Nothing was put out yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 297

You deserved it 159

Today, my 18-year-old boyfriend freaked out and kept asking me if I was sure I wouldn't get pregnant, because I forgot to take my birth control pill last night. We didn't actually have sex; he apparently thought me simply missing the pill would magically get me pregnant. The hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 917

You deserved it 6 060

Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year-olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 078

You deserved it 4 846