Sleep, Religion Health Jesus said go to sleep

Jesus said go to sleep

david99021 - - Turkey - Ankara

Today, I told my mom I've been having sleep issues and asked if she could take me to the doctor. She told me I just needed to read the Bible more. Needless to say, I still can't sleep. FML

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nooblper 21

Friday 20 March 2015 0:15

Read the bible until you fall asleep from boredom.

netflixislove 32

Friday 20 March 2015 0:12

Apparently she thinks you need Jesus... Although I don't think he will make you fall asleep

ribbnasforfan 13

Tuesday 8 March 2016 22:58

Would so fall to sleep just reading bout reading the bible, atheism is great sometimes! ??

Habacadavarus 12

Sunday 3 April 2022 18:39

If the bible can't put you to sleep, you definitely need to speak to a professional.

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Today, I was eating with a friend while walking on the sidewalk. A couple of pigeons were bothering us so I threw a fry onto the street. As a flock of pigeons were gathering around the fry, a truck drove by. Only four survived. FML

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Today, I was so bored that I spent two hours researching the history of spoons. FML

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Today, I was kicked in the crotch. The girl who did it thought I was her ex-boyfriend. I'm a girl. FML

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Today, I had to use a sick day from the school I teach at. While I was off, another teacher called me mid delirium, because my students were borderline rioting over the work I left for them. I'd asked them to read a book and edit the one-page essay they've had two weeks to work on. FML

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Today, I started my dream job of being a veterinarian. My first day consisted of having to put down 12 dogs and 5 cats. FML

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Today, after drinking myself to an oblivion, I awoke with a massive hangover. I didn’t want to go to work, but every excuse I came up with in my head screamed of alcoholics. When I arrived, my boss asked me why I was there. It was my day off. FML

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