Money, Kids, Parenting, Poopoo peepee and Gross: Ivy league

Ivy league

By WasteOMoney - 04/07/2011 01:50 - United States

Today, my son called me from medical school, asking for a new phone. Why? Because he dropped it in the toilet. How? Trying to take a video of his anus while taking a dump. I pay $80,000 a year just to hear he took a dump on his phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 835

You deserved it 6 283

Fête de la Musique: Notes et Négligences
When melodies meet misadventures, the Fête de la Musique becomes a symphony of laughter! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Kinda bizarre

By @SamAnderson - 17/08/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, my 17 year-old son has been using his phone on the toilet. Every time he poops, he takes his phone to the bathroom. Why does he need his phone to use the bathroom? He uses the toilet with his phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 599

So cute

By lildale92 - 05/11/2019 02:00

Today, my youngest decided my phone needed a bath in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 775

You deserved it 305

Ironic

By Anonymous - 05/02/2023 10:00

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet. Now I know why they call it 'smart' phone; it's smarter than me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 218

You deserved it 609

By Anonymous - 08/09/2018 15:00 - United States - Buffalo

Today, while pooping at work, I was scrolling through social media. I dropped my phone in the toilet and the automatic flusher engaged, flushing my phone halfway into the pipes, which then flooded the toilet. I had to call maintenance and explain what happened to retrieve phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 801

You deserved it 2 215

By wtfuraretard - 19/02/2010 20:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called me over, all just to unclog his toilet. It was clogged because he put my phone in it while he was taking a dump to see if it would actually flush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 042

You deserved it 5 217

By Anonymous - 20/10/2010 22:22 - United States

Today, my dad got a new phone and put me on speed dial. I have received several voice mails from him accidentally dialed. They are from him riding the train, in a meeting, having lunch, and, most recently, him taking a monstrous dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 368

You deserved it 3 328

By AK-47 - 17/07/2015 23:04 - United States - Farmington

Today, I dropped my phone in the toilet in a public restroom. That would have been bad enough, without the guy in the next stall saying, "Jesus! What the hell did you eat?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 868

You deserved it 3 503

By Anonymous - 30/03/2018 01:30 - United States - Stamford

Today, I was checking my phone while using the toilet. In a distressing moment of my brain mixing up the signals to my hands, I dropped my phone into the bowl and pressed my thumb into the shitty paper to turn it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 635

You deserved it 3 741

By Katherine - 13/02/2012 21:23 - United States

Today, I was talking to a friend about how many germs live on the average cell phone. My five year old son apparently overheard me talking, and decided to give my cell phone a bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 637

You deserved it 6 516

By Pottymouth - 25/07/2009 17:14 - United States

Today, I was having really bad diarrhea. I sat down on the toilet and heard a plop, thinking it was just me going to the bathroom. After I was finished, I look in the toilet to see my iPhone sitting in a pool of diarrhea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 055

You deserved it 24 568

Tessa39 0

Monday 4 July 2011 8:34

sounds like he is a genius

EvilDoll 7

Monday 4 July 2011 8:35

Well, his education and your money are both going down the drain. Among other things...

Comments

JoeyPterodactyl 0

Monday 4 July 2011 15:11

If he was so smart he'd be able to find video if that easily on the Internet.

J35511333 0

Monday 4 July 2011 15:18

do we have the same mum or what?! sounds like it -__-

laduf 5

Monday 4 July 2011 15:18

I hope I never have your son as my doctor. He sounds super immature.

J35511333 0

Monday 4 July 2011 15:20

OMG! FML! I hate my iPhone! wrong Fml! I'm so sorry!

Bloothebawss 9

Monday 4 July 2011 15:28

Ewwwwwwww.

sweet_blasphemy 2

Monday 4 July 2011 15:38

I guess all that money was *puts on sunglasses* flushed away. YYYEEEAAAHHH!!!!

0opsie 6

Monday 4 July 2011 16:54

Why would anyone admit that? Why not just say it slipped while you were texting?

mikelust1977 7

Monday 4 July 2011 17:04

maybe he needed a report on how shit happens

mikelust1977 7

Monday 4 July 2011 17:08

maybe get him a phone that doesn't have a camera

loooveit 4

Monday 4 July 2011 17:09

how did he get into medical school in the first place

bigassfish97 0

Monday 4 July 2011 17:11

your son is a smart dumbass

FML on Facebook

Keywords

My ex Love Sex Weird Surprise Work Miscellaneous Roommate Fire Neighbours Noise Birthday Cute Embarrassing Games Weddings Awkward Money Suspicious Music Drunk Cops Gross Poopoo peepee Transportation Cars Relatable Bodyshaming Dating Family

The Top

Today, my daughter proudly showed me her new tattoo sleeve, which is made up of an angry cupcake, hemp leaves, and a My Little Pony character. She's almost 30, still unemployed, and still lives in my home. I now have no hope of her ever becoming a productive member of society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 341

You deserved it 8 385

Today, I was accused of masturbating during work. I was actually just getting something out of my pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 340

You deserved it 3 567

Today, while driving my new car, a squirrel ran in front of me so I slammed on my brakes. The person behind me didn't notice and rear-ended me. The squirrel got hit by a car going the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 486

You deserved it 18 110

Can you name the movie before the timer runs out?

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 132

Today, I went to my job as an aide for first-grade students. I went home with a swollen face after my student punched me because I was, "making the timer go too fast" and he wanted more iPad time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 749

You deserved it 169

Today, I learned the hard way that age is not just a number when I completely threw out my back while sitting on the ground, gently tossing a ball. FML

I agree, your life sucks 853

You deserved it 118