Animals It's a doggy dog world

It's a doggy dog world

RoommateWanted - 10/09/2013 21:02 - United Kingdom - Glasgow

Today, my roommate unexpectedly came home with a new puppy. I'm severely allergic to dogs. When I reminded her of this, she explained that the puppy was her family now and if I didn't like it I should move out because blood is thicker than water. My roommate is my sister. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Anonymous - 29/06/2014 22:28 - United States

Today, after leaving my mom's house, I got 4 text messages from her about how I was a terrible person for not saying goodbye to my sister when I left. The "sister" she was referring to is the family dog. FML

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the un-loved child - 28/07/2013 22:34 - United States - Salida

Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML

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My new friend

*sneeze* -

Today, it's my wife's birthday. Since I had work, I gave her $200 to spend on herself and left. When I came back with dinner and the movie she wanted, I found her with a dog. She is very attached to him because the shelter was going to put him down. I love him, but I'm allergic to dogs. FML

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Crowded

Anonymous - - United States - South Salem

Today, my sister came to stay with me in my apartment for the last few weeks of her difficult pregnancy. However she didn't tell me she was bringing her two dogs, her jackass of a husband, my bratty nephew, and an inflatable kiddie pool so she could have a natural water birth in my living room. FML

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Cats rule, boys drool

achoooo - 07/11/2009 05:34 - United States

Today, to celebrate moving into a new apartment, my girlfriend decided she would get a kitten. She didn't know I'm allergic to cats. When I told her, she decided that she couldn't date someone who couldn't be around her cat; the one she doesn't have yet. FML

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busybuzzybee - 17/08/2011 00:31 - United States

Today, my asshole of a roommate finally decided to move out. Not only did he take his belongings with him, he took some of mine as well. Including my dog. FML

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Cats 4 life

Doggone it - 12/11/2022 12:00

Today, I've been living with my new roommate's dogs for three days now. In an ironic twist, the small one is very well-behaved, while the two big ones are disobedient little shits. Every day, I get a thousand more reminders as to why I'm a cat person. I can't do this anymore. FML

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nackpattywhackgiveadogabone - 23/09/2010 11:01 - United States

Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML

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Furry family

crazy dog lady - 02/11/2020 02:02 - United States

Today, my girlfriend got evicted for having too many dogs. She expects me to let her and all 5 dogs live in my one-bedroom apartment. When I told her no, that I’d get evicted too, she said that should be a sacrifice I’m willing to make for “our family” if I really loved her. They aren’t even my dogs. FML

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ginya - 07/06/2016 01:58 - United States - Bedford

Today, my sister asked me to let her dog out of the kennel when I got home. I did only to have the little beast bite me. She then ate the entire content of the cat's litter box, which she couldn't keep down. FML

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Aeroxx1337 17

Wednesday 11 September 2013 9:08

Clearly her skull is thicker than her blood.

Miss_Latina 13

Wednesday 11 September 2013 9:11

Now you have 2 bitches as roommates

ScarletBloom 14

Wednesday 11 September 2013 10:56

Cut her some slack. Her wussy is thicker and saggier than her foul mouth. That's why she needs something bigger. Hope you get my drift.

lolita88_fml 27

Wednesday 11 September 2013 13:03

No actually, what drift is meant to be gotten?

marchelley907 9

Wednesday 11 September 2013 11:09

what a bitch move!

martin8337 35

Wednesday 11 September 2013 13:24

OP, I guess yor sister wanted you out in the wor as t way.

Shmatterhorn 38

Thursday 12 September 2013 2:10

What? I think you wanted to say that the dimwitted sister needs a backhand to jostle her brain cells.

LegolasPrincess 10

Wednesday 11 September 2013 13:37

That's really a low blow. I love my pets, and yes I feel like they're part my family. But I wouldn't screw over my actual flesh and blood for a dog. Your sister has issues, you should take the imitative get out just so you don't catch the stupidity.

Chubgatti 10

Wednesday 11 September 2013 13:47

its actually, "The covenant of the blood is thicker than the water of the womb." Meaning, the bonds you make matter more than family. I guess she's right.