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By StungAlot - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 712

You deserved it 2 818

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Same thing different taste

By StungAlot - 12/06/2019 06:18

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I writhed in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet, that I'm embarrassing him. He also mentioned that jellyfish were out today and that I should be careful. Thanks, dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 855

You deserved it 225

By The_HML - 24/03/2009 02:48 - United States

Today, I was swimming in the ocean, not too far off shore. I had asked my mom to come in, but she was afraid of the water because fish had nipped at her toes or something back in the day. I told her there was nothing to fear. I ended up getting stung in the balls by a Jelly fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 997

You deserved it 11 170

By Heather - 31/05/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, I thought I would make my first trip to the beach. While in the water, I was stung by a jellyfish. My friend had to pee on me. I went back into the water to wash the pee off and got stung by another jellyfish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 424

You deserved it 10 951

By Username - 05/06/2019 20:00

Today, at the beach, I swam pretty far out into the ocean. I ended up getting pummelled by the waves and got a painful cramp in my leg. The whole beach watched me flail and scream, while my friends rolled their eyes as they dragged me out of the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 461

You deserved it 944

Now you know

By Ouchies - 18/03/2021 17:01

Today, I went to the beach. My friend decided it would be funny to push me into a bunch of Portuguese Man-O-War jellyfish washed up on the shore. Did you know their tentacles can sting even if they’re dead? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 170

You deserved it 96

By michellekel - 04/07/2009 12:10 - France

Today, I went to the beach on the cote d'azur and the lifeguard told me that even though there were two jellyfish in the bay, it was safe to swim. Five minutes into swimming, I got stung twice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 632

You deserved it 6 968

By busybee - 10/05/2009 03:38 - United States

Today, I went to the zoo with a guy I like, when we were there we saw a swarm of bees. I told him that if I got stung he would have to watch me because my dad is deathly allergic to bees and I have never been stung. Jokingly, he nudged me into the bush and said "let's see". We did. I'm allergic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 65 779

You deserved it 5 842

By effingawwesome - 11/04/2009 18:52 - United States

Today, I was surfing and trying to impress some girls on the beach. While I was out in the water, a jellyfish wrapped itself around my torso. I started to yell and freak out, making a huge scene. I grabbed it off of me, only to realize that I was freaking out over a plastic grocery bag. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 622

You deserved it 56 635

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 22:04 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 412

You deserved it 2 302

Scorpio rising

By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 03:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend was complaining of a scorpion sting on his leg. I told him to stop whining and get over it. Later, as I went to sleep, I felt a sharp pain in my arm. As I flipped on the light, I saw a scorpion crawling over the blankets. Now my entire arm is numb and I can't stop crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 572

You deserved it 107 601

caplox 6

Tuesday 19 June 2012 16:09

pee on it.

loserman67 35

Tuesday 19 June 2012 16:12

Could have been worse. He could have whipped out his dick and started peeing on you in public.

Comments

96skeeter 6

Wednesday 20 June 2012 19:19

He should have peed on you

YourMoms_BF 2

Friday 22 June 2012 16:29

Your dad is a douchebag.

TofuSpaceships 3

Saturday 30 June 2012 4:20

Ouch... Are you alright now?

DanielleinDC 33

Tuesday 1 January 2013 16:55

Wow, your dad just might be a candidate for father of the year. If there's a lifeguard, s/he's no doubt dealt with jellyfish stings.

FML191919 3

Saturday 9 March 2013 16:46

you're a bitch

eatenByZombies 1

Monday 6 January 2014 4:40

You don't "writhe" in pain when you get stung by a jellyfish, you suck it up and medicate it.

HunkyMumbles 27

Friday 11 July 2014 16:44

Nice dad!

IWillEatYouAlive 16

Friday 20 May 2016 1:25

Sounds like my dad...

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The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 2 706

You deserved it 289

Today, I went to the doctor for a check up, having had a head injury a week ago and suffering some memory loss. Turns out, the medicine he gave me for my head has memory loss as a side effect. He then said, "I told you. Don't you remember?" After I said no, he said, "I figured." and giggled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 200

You deserved it 2 831

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I agree, your life sucks 87 743

You deserved it 5 038

Today, I found out that my German wasn't as great as I thought it was. Trying to give directions to some German tourists, I tried to say, "I hope I don't get you lost." Turns out I actually said something closer to, "I hope I don't seduce you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 098

You deserved it 6 311

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I agree, your life sucks 8 582

You deserved it 38 458

Today, I almost lost my virginity at the age of 34. After years of putting off sex and waiting for marriage, the moment arrived. My new wife could't stop laughing at how small I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 76 167

You deserved it 11 770

Help?

Same thing different taste

Now you know

Scorpio rising

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