Health, Pregnancy and Dogs: Help!

Help!

By Anonymous - 23/04/2013 11:25 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife paged my emergency line at work. Thinking she was in serious danger, I raced home and found her hysterically crying. When I asked her what was going on, she replied, "The dogs won't stop barking!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 989

You deserved it 6 445

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Same thing different taste

Hello from the other side

By losthusband - 11/10/2020 20:01 - United States

Today, my pregnant wife and I got separated while out shopping. She ended up having meltdown and crying so hard the manager had to call me over the PA. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 214

You deserved it 216

By Tristan Brantley - 11/03/2012 07:36 - United States

Today, I called my wife from work to check in on her because she's eight months pregnant. She didn't answer. Instead she showed up at my work hysterically crying and screaming, "You don't love me because I'm a fat whale!" She then knocked everything off my desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 951

You deserved it 3 403

HUMAN! I NEED ATTENTION!

By Mur - 09/09/2023 22:00

Today, my girlfriend called me four times in a row at work. Worried, I stepped outside and answered the phone. Through tears, she screamed, "It's the cat!" Was he sick or hurt? "NO! He won't stop meowing!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 139

By Anonymous - 11/12/2014 21:47 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got to experience the horror of my wife's pregnancy. She woke me up abruptly at 5 am by throwing up all over me due to her terrible morning sickness, then ate pickles covered in mayonnaise, and later dropped to the floor sobbing when I told her we were out of dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 357

You deserved it 5 299

By what-the-what - 29/10/2017 13:00 - United States - Mount Pleasant

Today, my mother called me at work, freaking out about my dog, so I panicked. What was wrong? He had a hard-on and she'd never seen that happen before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 793

You deserved it 304

It wasn't me

By johnG - 21/12/2009 15:23 - Canada

Today, I got a call from my local hospital's emergency room, stating my wife was in labour. My wife and I split years ago, but just haven't divorced. She's been telling everyone I'm the baby's father. My current girlfriend is 7 months pregnant with my child. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 229

You deserved it 9 967

By letmediealready - 22/12/2017 19:00

Today I saved my wife's puppy from drowning in an icy pond and I ended up in the ER struggling to breath from the water in my lungs. When my wife showed up to see me, I caught her flirting with my doctor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 777

You deserved it 348

The bed is lava

By for better or for farts - 06/08/2020 23:01

Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 451

You deserved it 211

By Stressed dad - 18/07/2017 20:00

Today, my wife's water broke so I drove her to the hospital. After 16 hours without labor, I went home to get a little sleep. Four hours later I got the call and ran outside to find that my car was towed from my parking space. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 111

You deserved it 1 042

Understandable

By whytetrash - 02/11/2012 05:53 - Australia - Newcastle

Today, my manager made me stay at work for an extra four hours, making me miss an urgent specialist appointment I'd scheduled months ago. Why? Because her neighbor's dog was having puppies, and she wanted to go home early and see them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 913

You deserved it 2 895

Lizardgirl 7

Tuesday 23 April 2013 16:51

I can't help but feel bad for OP's wife too. The poor woman must be full of hormones and is probably on an emotional rollercoaster right now.

BeccaHugs 17

Tuesday 23 April 2013 16:50

I sympathize with her: dogs that bark for hours on end are incredibly annoying and frustrating. But think of it this way: if your wife had not called you, eventually your neighbours would have.

Comments

vagrandma 5

Tuesday 23 April 2013 18:47

You have to be understanding with pregnant women! It may have seemed like an emergency to her, especially if she's sick!

Raesin 21

Tuesday 23 April 2013 19:22

Pregnancy is a sickness now? lol

lndala 15

Tuesday 23 April 2013 19:28

#76 means that the wife could have morning sickness or something similar. Quite common in a pregnancy.

anthym 2

Tuesday 23 April 2013 18:49

Who the **** uses pagers in the year 2013?

sierra142 19

Tuesday 23 April 2013 19:34

I know a few doctors that do. Other than that I am unsure.

Lonus 9

Tuesday 23 April 2013 18:51

Is she pregnant?

lincolnick4 19

Tuesday 23 April 2013 19:02

you just have to be a little more understanding towards her

Myo_fml 20

Tuesday 23 April 2013 20:01

Once a woman is pregnant, the hormones can do some crazy things. Something that's nothing can suddenly be armageddon.

yzzami 17

Tuesday 23 April 2013 20:44

Was just about to say this. And if its their first time, they're probably especially distraught because its new and they arent 100% sure what is going on with their bodies

c4rpi0 20

Tuesday 23 April 2013 21:14

At least you got to leave early from work tho

adam_tajyar 10

Tuesday 23 April 2013 21:16

I get that's she's pregnant, and emotional but getting ur husband to come is dumb if he has boss that's not understanding and could potentially fire him for just leaving work. She needs to suck it up

Fassholes21 6

Tuesday 23 April 2013 21:47

aweeee

Chanty1749 1

Tuesday 23 April 2013 22:44

I can sympathize with OP's wife. I'm currently 9 months pregnant and I often feel like I don't have control over my emotions or my body. I've had a few ridiculous meltdowns myself. It's al so worth mentioning that OP's wife paged him, he could of called her at home before rushing back.