Work: Gun control

Gun control

By grant b - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boss asked if he could pay me in guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 721

You deserved it 6 164

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/07/2012 05:29 - United States - Dallas

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 027

You deserved it 9 883

By HelpMe1 - 06/11/2014 06:53 - Indonesia - Jakarta

Today, my boss told me to fire the unstable, former military, gun nut employee. He's been making death threats to his supervisors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 269

You deserved it 2 956

By corey - 28/02/2012 03:41 - United States

Today, I went to ask my boss for a raise. He laughed at me and said, "That's hilarious because I was going to ask you if you could take a pay cut!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 274

You deserved it 2 337

Seize the means of production

By vikts - 29/05/2012 17:52 - Luxembourg - Olm

Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 360

You deserved it 1 961

Sure, come on in…

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - La Mesa

Today, while working third shift alone at a gas station, I had to deal with a crazy guy tripping balls and asking me if it was okay to bring a gun into the place. I don't get paid nearly enough for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 677

You deserved it 1 662

By Sudokori - 07/09/2017 01:30

Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 267

You deserved it 270

Tonight, on Asshole Bosses…

By Anonymous - 03/10/2019 22:00

Today, I went to pick up my last paycheck, since I was fired last week. My boss said he wasn't going to give it to me. I told him it's illegal not to, and he told me with a shit-eating grin, "What are you gonna do? Arrest me?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 044

You deserved it 140

Lay the blame

By jobless - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, a guy came into my gas station, showed me the gun on his hip, and asked me to kindly empty the register. My asshole boss claimed afterwards that because we live in an open carry state, and because the guy didn't point the gun at me, that there was no actual robbery and I just gave him free money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 363

You deserved it 2 889

MVP

By Killmenow - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, having just told me what a great job I've been doing, and how he'd really like to start giving me some more responsibility, my boss asked me if I'd sharpen a couple of pencils for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 057

You deserved it 2 853

Know your place

By Anonymous - 06/12/2014 18:23 - United States

Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 503

You deserved it 9 056

visiON123 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 12:05

Isn't that's how everyone is paid in Texas?

Valentina_Baby 7

Thursday 9 June 2011 12:08

And that's how you survive the zombie apocalypse

Comments

deathcorekid99 0

Friday 10 June 2011 21:27

and this is an FML how? xD

johnnydudeman 0

Friday 10 June 2011 22:21

I would have said "Guns. **** YEAH!"

gatorsnd13 0

Friday 10 June 2011 23:22

say no?

Allier2227 0

Friday 10 June 2011 23:24

That kinda sux but who wouldn't want guns there pretty cool

hubbs666 2

Saturday 11 June 2011 0:16

I want to get paid in trident layers

Babalu722 3

Saturday 11 June 2011 5:00

i get paid in 1994 toyota mufflers, aluminum washer rings and stuffed bunny rabbits

kronosa 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 5:18

this is not a FML. you are pathetic

hippy_lady 4

Saturday 11 June 2011 6:51

at least it wasn't gum.

schoolbus 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 8:24

That would make an awesome second job!

7g23 0

Saturday 11 June 2011 8:34

God bless America!

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 639

You deserved it 7 789

Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 727

You deserved it 9 316

Today, my best friend, who I've had a crush on for over 2 years, and who I could describe as unattainable, asked me out on a date. It went great and ended with an amazing kiss. Then she texted that she thinks she actually likes girls. She's unattainable, alright. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 121

You deserved it 384

Today, my husband refuses to have sex with me until I get my tubes tied. We both agree that we don't want children, but this seems to be an exaggerated reaction since he learned that most birth controls are not 100% effective. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 284

You deserved it 285

Today, after studying for an exam, I decided to take a short nap. Just then, our neighbors, who were a couple, argued like crazy about some dumb thing the guy did. I didn't get to rest at all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 148

Today, my girlfriend and her mother bought a hanger for my $2000 guitar as a birthday present. They wanted to surprise me by hanging it on the wall. They screwed it upside down, so before I came home it fell off and my guitar broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 552

You deserved it 764