Health, Embarrassing and Food: Burger, everything burger - FML

Burger, everything burger

By HANGRYGAL - 15/09/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered enough food for three people. The cashier asked if I needed extra napkins “for the group.” I panicked and said, “Yes, for the kids in the back.” There are no kids. Just me, alone, eating like a human trash compactor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 141

You deserved it 436

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Same thing different taste

A bit much

By Anonymous - 27/08/2019 18:00 - United States

Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 538

You deserved it 1 002

Fussy eater

By germaphobe - 19/08/2021 20:59 - United States

Today, my kids and I went to have dinner with a coworker. After everyone ate, the kids went to play while I helped clear the dishes. To my horror, instead of individually wrapping the kids leftovers, she scraped all the uneaten food back into the main pots. I wanted to puke on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 964

You deserved it 164

Classic

By Anonymous - 11/03/2021 16:30 - United States - Enterprise

Today, I ordered a large stuffed crust supreme pizza for myself. When I picked it up, I asked for extra plates and napkins so the cashier wouldn't know I don't have any friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 577

By Anonymous - 09/08/2010 13:24 - United States

Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 374

You deserved it 54 326

Peckish

By Ethan - 21/12/2024 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I ordered a mountain of junk food for myself on Deliveroo. Embarrassed, I pretended there was other people in the house by yelling, "Food’s here, everyone!" to avoid judgment. The delivery guy smiled and said, "Come on, be honest mate, no one else is in there is there?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 624

Relatable

By Anonymous - 28/10/2025 00:00

Today, I ordered pizza for myself. When the delivery guy arrived, I opened the door in pajama pants, messy hair and a face mask. He smiled and said, “Oh, this order says ‘Family Combo Meal.’ Where’s everyone else?” I just said, “They’re busy.” They weren’t. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 198

Hey big spender!

By Anonymous - 11/11/2025 22:00

Today, I received a food delivery. The bag was huge. I thought the restaurant had made a mistake and given me extra food. I checked the receipt; it said, “Special note: For our hungriest customer. Extra napkins!” They'd remembered me from last time I ordered a ton of food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 308

Brain fog

By Wilmot - 22/10/2025 12:00

Today, I went through a drive-thru and ordered a coffee. The cashier asked, “Hot or iced?” I panicked and said, “Yes.” We both just stared at each other until she said, “So… which one?” I wanted to drive away and never return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 140

You deserved it 333

By can't eat paper - 11/05/2014 01:34 - United States

Today, after a long day at work, I was starving, so I stopped by the drive-through for something to eat. When I got home and hurriedly opened the bag, all I found inside was napkins. Thanks, McDonald's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 809

You deserved it 11 412

Face your fears

By Anonymous - 08/10/2025 15:00

Today, I was standing in line at a burger joint, facing my social anxiety and practicing my order in my head so I wouldn’t mess it up. When it was finally my turn, I panicked and said, “One large confidence, please.” The cashier just handed me a straw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 306

You deserved it 137

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my sister-in-law announced she would like me to be her surrogate, so that her body doesn't look like a stretched wobbly mess after childbirth. Apparently, I'm a perfect candidate, as "we won't see a difference." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 298

You deserved it 195

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answered, "Well, you don't kiss me often either." Now she keeps kissing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 205

You deserved it 44 988

Today, a stranger called me, saying I look hot in the bra I was wearing. When I hung up, thinking it was a joke, I opened the back door, and saw a man running away from my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 972

You deserved it 2 326

Today, at my job at a pet store, my boss told me to go outside and hand out flyers. I saw a man sitting on a bench and walked up, saying, "Hi! Do you have a pet?" He teared up and said, "I just put her down this morning." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 256

You deserved it 183

Today, my brother was playing one of those old street fighter games. He suddenly asked me what "K.O." meant. I told him it meant "Knocked Out," but he started getting mad at me because "'knocked' isn't spelled with a 'k'". He's 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 260

You deserved it 1 532

Today, I was babysitting a little girl down the street. She pulled out her 'memory box', which contained many childhood treasures. After pulling out a variety of dresses and baby pictures, she says, "... and here's my belly button!" and plops an umbilical chord in my hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 921

You deserved it 3 681