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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Intimacy

    By loon - 28/10/2008 11:13 - France

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, the girl I'm secretly in love with, whom I was talking to on MSN, told me she'd "brb in 10, no wait 20, oh make that 30 min" depending on her boyfriend's stamina. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 70 889
    You deserved it 9 810
    Share  

    Party boy

    By Daemon - 27/10/2008 04:57 - France

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, after a party, I brought a girl to the flat I share with my two best friends. While we are doing it, she asked me, "You're not afraid your friends will hear us?" The only answer that spontaneously came out of my mouth was, "Don't worry, they're used to it." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 20 543
    You deserved it 89 304
    Share  

    By rmL - 13/10/2008 08:31

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, the real estate guy came with potential buyers to visit my house. He opened my bedroom while I was wanking. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 57 027
    You deserved it 41 635
    Share  
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    Keywords

    Healthy Lifestyle Work Gross Cars Kids Transportation Argument Cheating Love Break-ups Ironic Family Awkward Parenting Embarrassing Coworkers Smells Relatable Weddings Mental health Miscellaneous Funerals Money Food Health Friends NSFW Sex Intimacy Frustration
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, while working at a pizza shop near a college campus, I got an order to deliver to the dorms. Extremely busy at work and annoyed that someone wouldn't take 3 minutes to walk over, I spat on the pizza. When I arrived to the dorm, a woman in a wheelchair opened the door. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 20 209
    You deserved it 274 633
    Today, I fell asleep in the car on a 10+ hour trip with my family as soon as we got on the highway. When I woke up an hour later, I realized I'd had a wet dream. I had to sit next to my grandma with semen all over my thighs and boxers for the rest of the trip. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 80 251
    You deserved it 11 930
    Random FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, it's my birthday. I've spent most of it apologizing to my parents for the "hassle" of "having" to arrange a simple birthday dinner. Sorry I was born, guys. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 38 286
    You deserved it 3 271
    Today, I confided to my grandma that I'm suffering from depression and I feel like a burden to everyone. She replied that her grandpa used to suffer from depression too, but that he'd cured himself in the end, namely by committing suicide. Thanks, grandma, thanks. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 45 151
    You deserved it 4 239
    Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 43 169
    You deserved it 4 180
    Today, my husband ran at me, groaning like a zombie. I was so startled that I screamed, punched him, and started sobbing. Now he won't talk to me because this is 'the first step on the road of domestic violence'. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 32 403
    You deserved it 11 716
    Today, I got back from a 3 and a half week trip to South Africa to do volunteer work with children in townships. My parents forgot to pick me up, and I had to sit there by myself and wait for them, while 80 people of the same organization got loving hugs from their proud parents. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 41 607
    You deserved it 3 838
    Today, I was packing up to move when I decided to take a break. I went to get some water from the sink when a bug fell into my cup. Needless to say, I'm glad I'm moving. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 806
    You deserved it 100
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