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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Frustration

    Cover up

    By this_is_fucked - 24/10/2009 21:23 - Zimbabwe

    Spicy Spicy
    Today, I realized that I'm the only person in my house not getting any. My sister is sleeping with my ex. My roommate is sleeping with my brother, and my mom texted me, asking to make it look like she slept in her bed so that she didn't have to do the "walk of shame" in the morning. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 24 546
    You deserved it 2 928
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    Keywords

    Bikes Transportation Annoying Technology Miscellaneous Embarrassing Relatable Intimacy NSFW Sex Kids Healthy Lifestyle Poopoo peepee Animals Cats Gross Music Cars Growing old Frustration Parents Parenting Shopping Awkward Food Family Bodyshaming Love Health Painful
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, I had to leave my ACT prep class ten minutes in to pick up my drunken father from his best friend's baby shower. I picked him up along with a bill for the damage. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 29 494
    You deserved it 2 312
    Today, I went to the dentist after 24 hours of severe tooth pain. They did an emergency root canal. After the anesthesia wore off, within minutes, the pain returned only worse than before. Called the dentist, I had to return, only to find they had done the root canal on the wrong tooth. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 47 324
    You deserved it 3 045
    Today, I was tending the cash register. I scanned a lady's items which totaled $89.68. She paid with a $100 bill. I gave her $11.32 change. She angrily gave back the extra dollar and complained about "schools nowadays". I'm an AP Calculus student. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 13 185
    You deserved it 50 057
    Today, I realized my girlfriend has more hair on her abdomen than I have on mine. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 30 242
    You deserved it 6 560
    Today, one of my employees called in because he “got struck by lightning.” I told him that’s the dumbest excuse I’ve ever heard, and he’d better get his ass to work. Turns out he really did get struck by lightning. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 232
    You deserved it 1 692
    Today, on my first day as a middle school substitute teacher, the class I was in had blue passes for boys and red passes for girls. The kid in the front row raised a number two for the bathroom, so I handed her a red pass, only for him to brush his hair back and say, "I'm a boy." The whole class laughed and called him "Babe". FML
    I agree, your life sucks 851
    You deserved it 301
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