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The all-time greatest FMLs

Pass the parcel

By Anonymous - 30/06/2021 10:59

Today, I went to my son's friend's birthday party and felt really proud of giving a great gift. It just so happened that I regifted the same gift that his friend's mother gave to my son the month before, because I forgot to check the name on the bag. It looked like she was about to faint. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 1 804

Natural selection

By Anonymous - 29/11/2024 20:00 - Canada - Minnedosa

Today, while eating dinner, my child picked up a piece of their chicken off the floor and put it in their mouth. It wasn’t until during bath time did I realize it wasn't chicken but poop that fell out of their diaper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 431

Technically…

By I followed her orders! - 04/12/2023 14:00 - United States

Today, my boss told me to not burn the place down while she was outside. When she came back inside, I accidentally started a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 495

Unfinished sympathy

By Anonymous - 22/09/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, I walked into the office bathroom and saw my manager in tears. I tried to comfort her and gave her a hug. Turns out, she wasn’t crying, she was having a sneezing fit, and looked horrified at my sympathy hug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 201

You deserved it 415

Man's Not Hot

By FML Videos - 22/11/2018 00:30 - United States - New York

This is why man won't take off the jacket!

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 289

Soaked

By Jus' me - 30/12/2024 22:00 - United Kingdom - Bristol

Today, I was getting ready to relax on my couch and watch TV under a comforter. I had a bag of snacks and the remote in one hand, and a glass of Coke in the other. Usually, I throw the remote onto the couch before settling down… only this time I had it in my left hand and not my right. At least the glass didn't shatter this time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 454

It's trending again

By Anonymous - 15/10/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I was supposed to start my exciting new job. I knew I needed a good night's sleep to prepare but because of the excitement I was worried, so I decided to try that tart cherry juice I kept seeing on TikTok to help me sleep. It worked. A little too well. I woke up 14 hours later, missed my first day, got fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 600

Leave spiders alone

By Anonymous - 01/01/2021 08:01 - United States - Atoka

Today, I took a stick lighter and used it to set a large spider on fire to kill it, as stepping on it could possibly release its babies if it were a momma. I ignited more than the spider, and had to call the fire department. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 1 976

RSVP classic

By Anonymous - 20/05/2024 00:00

Today, despite checking, double-checking, and triple-checking before we sent them to every member of our friends and family, some who live in foreign countries, our wedding invitations somehow had not one, but two spelling mistakes. They misspelled my surname and the address of the church. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 506

Femboys are where it's at

By Sex isn't great anyway - 02/01/2026 15:00

Today, I found out that my husband hasn't wanted sex because he's been fucking the feminine gay guy he works with. I could divorce him, but I like not getting constantly bothered for sex, and I don't want to deal with the stress of divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 336

You got slimed

By alyssa ig idk - 30/09/2023 06:00 - United States - Allen Park

Today, I wasted 20 minutes trying to open a container of slime, only for rotten green liquid and weird brownish yellow goo to spray spanning 5 feet in all directions from me and my bed. I nearly threw up and now am getting a wet, sleepless night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 666

Play that Blink 182 song

By Mommys boy - 16/08/2024 12:00 - Australia

Today, I got a text from a number I didn’t recognize that said, "I miss you." Assuming it was my mom and her new phone, I replied, "Miss you too, love you!" Turns out it was my new boss, checking to see if I’d be able to work an extra shift. Even though it was her text that was badly worded, I'm now known as the person who declared her love to the boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 409

Are you OK?

By TooMuchWattpad - 20/07/2023 15:00 - United States - Piscataway

Today, I cried so much I felt nauseous and almost puked. Why was I crying? I made up a hot, brooding, cold, and heartless guy who secretly cared about me, and who's super protective. Then I imagined him dying by being stabbed. I cried over a guy I made up in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 1 397

I hate surprises

By Anonymous - 18/04/2026 22:00 - United States

Today, my husband and kids apparently forgot my birthday. I was so happy at first because I have always hated my birthday, and thought it could just be another day on the calendar. No. They planned and threw a massive surprise party for me when I got home from work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 373

Sobering

By Anonymous - 23/02/2022 02:59

Today, I drank half a bottle of tequila and had an edible within 30 minutes. I couldn't remember a thing until this morning when my roommates told me I pissed myself on the couch, projectile vomited in the living room, and went on to fondle my roommates, who also had to help me shower. I have a designated seat on the couch now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200

You deserved it 1 995

Quite the doozy

By Anonymous - 07/05/2024 12:00 - United States - Riverside

Today, my wife has moved into the guest room and has been giving me the cold shoulder ever since I asked for a paternity test for our kids. She swears she’s never cheated, so what’s she so offended for? Women make no sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 1 693

Reverse Uno prank

By Anonymous - 13/08/2023 04:00 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, my best friend, who I hadn’t seen since last year, picked me up and we got to talking about our memories together. I brought up the time we both cheated on our girlfriends at a Red Hot Chilli Peppers concert. Little did I know his girlfriend was waiting in the back of the car to scare me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 966

Cat fight

By Mishka - 04/05/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, we got a new kitten, and my older cat is not happy. I just learned that my fiance doesn't interfere when they fight. He says watching my old fat cat chase the kitten is the funniest thing he's seen all month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 446

Self-sabotage

By ToxicSelf - 05/06/2025 03:00 - Germany - Berlin

Today, I'm ruining my own life by being incredibly lazy at my new job. It scares me, as my family is dependent on my income, and I love this job too. Why am I always on self-destruct mode? I really want to snap out of it and be hardworking like so many others I know (including my husband). FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 479

Mr Butterfingers

By Anonymous - 26/03/2024 00:00 - Canada

Today, I dropped my phone. I'd only just bought this new phone last night. It barely survived 12 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 486

Singed

By Bernice - 26/01/2025 15:00 - Canada

Today, I was showing my grandson how to blow out the candles on his birthday cake. I got a little too close and set my hair on fire. The candles remained lit but my grandson was too terrified to go near them after the whole ordeal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 418

Crotch rot

By Anonymous - 19/07/2021 06:01 - United States

Today, I discovered that baking soda is not the same as Gold Bond powder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 1 140

Dine and dash

By talkomatic713 - 18/07/2021 09:58

Today, some friends and I went to IHOP. We joked about not having enough money, and as it turns out we were $5 short. We put down what we had and left. Upon getting to the car, I realized I'd forgotten my phone, and had to go back. I made eye contact with our waitress, our money in her hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 2 784

It's a trap!

By Anonymous - 25/08/2025 15:00 - Australia

Today, I tried on a tight sweater at the mall. It got stuck halfway over my head, and I couldn’t get it off. I had to shuffle out of the changing room, arms trapped in the air, and ask the clerk for help while blinded by the fabric. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 340

Insatiable

By Anonymous - 07/01/2026 20:00

Today, my husband is a normal man in his thirties with a receding hairline and a dad bod. So why am I insanely attracted to him and just want to always have sex with him or do things to him? I can't stop myself. I just turn on when I see him and start sucking his cock. He can't keep up and hates it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 270

Pressing charges

By Anonymous - 10/01/2026 22:00

Today, I was out of town but saw the Ring camera footage of a woman dragging my wife out of our house by her hair and beat the brakes off her on the front lawn. The woman was the mother of the girl our daughter had been bullying. When confronted, our daughter laughed and said, "Oh well." FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 484

Three piece suite

By Anonymous - 23/01/2024 06:00 - Canada - Saskatoon

Today, I found out my father sleeps in the nude, when I rushed into my parents room at night to inform them there was a bat in the house. I’m traumatized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 657

Acts of service

By Diet time 4 me smh - 12/07/2025 00:00 - United States

Today, I asked my best friend, who I love, what his new girlfriend has that I don’t. I've gone the extra mile, did favors, been there at his highest and lowest for about a year and a half, yet he rejected me and chose a girl who he’s merely known 5 months. Apparently a slim waist and perky boobs/butt matters more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 719

Ed Sheeran-lite

By Joshua Diamond - 14/12/2020 20:02 - United Kingdom

Today, I phoned my ex, who I only broke up with a week ago. I then told her about the song I'd written about her. I have written a song, but it's shite and I would die of embarrassment if I ever had to play it to her. I’ll have to play it to her and confess my simpy, wet ways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 1 963

Superficial

By Doi - 10/03/2023 03:00

Today, I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. I go on Instagram to find that the girl I rejected for her just announced her engagement. This girl literally moved mountains for me for years and my selfish ass didn’t wanna go out with her, all because my girlfriend was hotter. I’m a dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 2 755

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The Top

Today, I read on Facebook that someone shat outside our block of flats. I laughed and showed it to my friend who was with me. She turned to me, and said, "That was you, we were locked outside last night and you needed to pee, but a poo slipped out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 753

You deserved it 2 393

Today, one of my coworkers tried to convince me to be a model for his "foot fetish parties". I politely declined, just as I had the day before, and the day before that. This will probably continue every day, since our schedules are nearly identical. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 200

You deserved it 1 713

Today, I went to take my driver's test, and I did almost everything perfectly. The last thing was to back into a driveway. As I went to put my hand on the passenger seat to look over my shoulder, I got so nervous that I hit my instructor in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 699

You deserved it 3 638

Today, I was walking down the hall from the livingroom. I overheard my mom telling someone how proud she was of her baby girl and how much she loved her. I thought she was referring to my first ever all "A" report card. Turns out my new kitten used its litter box correctly for the first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 086

You deserved it 3 595

Today, my 7 year old daughter decided to use my laptop without my permission. She accidentally got SpaghettiOs on the screen, then used the hard side of a sponge, filled with soapy water, to scrub both the keyboard and screen of my laptop to clean it off so Mommy wouldn't know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 639

You deserved it 5 366

Today, my high school diploma came in the mail. I accidentally ripped the diploma while opening it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 816

You deserved it 532