The Top

The most agreed on FMLs The most commented on FMLs The most favorited

The top of the day The top of the week The top of the month The top of the year

The all-time greatest FMLs

Turn off

By Anonymous - 11/06/2026 22:00 - United States - St Louis

Today, after many comments over years about her needing to lose weight, I had to tell the woman I love, the woman I married, that she had gotten so overweight that the sight of her naked made me want to puke. Apparently her goal was to get so fat I'd stop asking for sex. I'm her third divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 205

No good deed and all that

By Jimmy - 14/06/2026 00:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I found a wallet on the sidewalk and spent an hour tracking down the owner. When I finally returned it, he opened it, counted the cash in front of me, and asked if I was sure there hadn't been more money in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 69

Hogwatch

By What great parents I have - 11/09/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, my parents were watching videos of police officers dealing with stubborn suspects. I overheard my mom saying, "It's like a Christian trying to argue with an atheist about God" and my dad agreed. Good to know that they're still as intolerant as ever, and it will never be safe for me to come out as an atheist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 248

Jumping to conclusions

By Anonymous - 07/08/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I’ve been getting death threats after a former friend did a storytime online about me getting rid of my dog after having a baby. She completely left out I had no choice but to rehome my dog because my baby is deathly allergic and had to be hospitalized for breathing problems from the dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 87

Dog park blues

By Anonymous - 18/03/2025 00:00 - United States - Miami

Today, I took a peaceful walk through the park, and then sat on the grass. As I was enjoying the quiet, a dog appeared out of nowhere and decided my shoes were a chew toy. I spent 10 minutes trying to wrestle my shoes away from this dog, while its owner casually walked in the opposite direction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 73

Where is my mind?

By Holy fuck - 01/04/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I had a horrific nightmare where I was lost in the woods and got mauled to death by a hungry wolf. I fully blacked out in the dream before waking up in real life, at 3AM, where I found that my room was pitch black because I forgot to open the curtains. I genuinely thought I was dead for about five seconds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 149

Destination funerals

By Anonymous - 11/03/2026 12:00

Today, my parents said we can't go to our grandma's funeral because it's going to be held in Hawaii in accordance with her wishes and we can't afford to travel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 71

Nag nag nag

By Anonymous - 07/03/2025 00:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my girlfriend complained about our recent dry spell. I've been under a lot of stress at work, but I told her some things she could do to help. She decided a better idea was to scream that I don't care about her needs, and that I should never "burden her" with my problems. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 146

Friends for miles

By mark - 14/06/2024 14:00 - United States

Today, every one of the girls in the friend group I’m in collectively agreed that I'm too soft, innocent, and adorable looking to date or hook up with. However, they expressed that they each want to get with my best friend, and asked me if I can set each of them up with him to hook up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 121

Dialectical materialism

By bro jiden - 25/04/2024 20:00 - United States

Today, I'm a graduate of a wealthy public school in So Cal. It astonishes me how many of my classmates don’t see a problem with today’s politicians, or gas, rent, and food prices. I was given shelter but had to earn everything I had growing up. I knew I wasn’t crazy though they acted like I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 150

Parental control

By Anonymous - 30/03/2026 09:00

Today, I learned that CPS still won't take my sister's kids away from her, even though they are living in literal squalor and filth. They run away to my house all the time and I constantly have to give them back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 68

BFF

By Anonymous - 31/10/2024 20:00 - Belgium - Kasterlee

Today, after my therapist told me I should open up to my friends more, I sent a message to a pen-pal and told her that I had asked for and found help with my postpartum troubles. She replied that I'm a bad friend for "always burdening her with my problems." FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 103

Good timing

By Business Mom - 09/03/2025 09:00 - United States - Dallas

Today, I was on a Zoom call with my boss and a client, discussing a new project. My toddler burst into the room and screamed, “Mommy, I shitted in the bathtub!” The camera was on, and I just froze, while my boss tried to hold in his laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 158

Thanks Teen Mom

By use condoms bro - 26/11/2022 16:00 - Argentina

Today, at 17 years-old, I discovered how embarrassing it is to have your kid scream on a flight and how hard it is to calm them down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 990

Hassle

By Anonymous - 21/10/2024 12:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my son was talking about his upcoming wedding like it’s a disease he got diagnosed with, like, “Yeah, I got this wedding thing” or “Man, it’s gonna be hard to get through” and my favourite “A pain in the ass, I wouldn’t with this shit on anyone.” I feel so sorry for his fiancé, poor girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 137

Cease to resist, giving my goodbye

By The song is "Wave of Mutilation" by Pixies. Love the song, hate myself. - 29/08/2024 12:00

Today, it was my last vacation day in Hawaii. It was lovely, I was happy. Then I heard a certain song about suicide at the airport, which triggered a severe depressive episode. Then the airline misplaced the bag with my pills. Now I'm struggling with suicidal thoughts while trying not to break down and cry in public. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 248

Am I the asshole?

By Yanil - 20/06/2021 16:02

Today, I ran into my ex-girlfriend from 4 years ago. Turns out she hasn’t found love again since I broke it off with her for her best friend. She’s not the bubbly, cheery girl I met before. I can’t help but feel like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 4 268

Horny camp

By Cathie - 05/06/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, I went camping with friends, two guys and one girl. Night came and things got freaky. Two of them began to make out. I wanted to make a move on my guy friend but he said, “Nah, let’s not ruin the friendship.” Then he proceeded to have a threesome with them. Oh, and the other guy didn’t want me either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 121

Busted

By Anonymous - 11/04/2021 08:00

Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 1 322

Mixed signals, mixed results

By Anonymous - 07/09/2024 16:00 - United Kingdom - Doncaster

Today, the guy I'm in love with invited me out to a gig with him and his friends, only to then try to set me up with his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 132

Awkward

By Anonymous - 26/12/2020 02:01

Today, I saw my friend's ex and noticed she had gained a ton of weight since he dated her and had been dating someone else. It reminded me of my friend, so I messaged him and made a joke about her being unrecognizable. He informed me that they started seeing each other again last week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 1 396

Clapped out

By Insulted - 12/10/2025 20:00

Today, I was at the gym when a trainer said, “Wow, good for you! I love seeing older people stay active.” I’m 29. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 81

By Anonymous - 29/06/2009 19:52 - United States

Today, my parents booked my 18th birthday party at Chuck E Cheese's. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 50

Yummy

By Veggie dinner - 01/07/2024 16:00 - Germany - Essen

Today, I was boiling pasta and tasting it every now and then too see if it was done. As an afterthought, I threw in some lentil pasta as well. Only after tasting a few more times did I notice the maggots that were now slowly rising in the boiling water. I didn't expect that much protein in those lentils. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 156

Competitive

By Anonymous - 20/02/2026 15:00

Today, and for most of our married life, my wife has made more money than me, until a few weeks ago when I got a promotion. I now make slightly more than she does and she’s actually grumpy over it. Why? FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 74

By maxthndr - 10/02/2009 05:36 - United States

Today, my boss fired me via text message. I don't have a text messaging plan. I paid $0.25 to get fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 39

Rip it up and start again

By Anonymous - 23/12/2024 12:00 - Ireland

Today, I finally finished my Christmas shopping and felt like an absolute champion. That was until I got home and realized I'd left one of the shopping bags in the parking lot. The bag contained the most expensive gift I'd bought. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 211

Alarming

By Billie - 26/03/2026 22:00

Today, I went to the grocery store, loaded up on food, then went to open my car door. When I opened it, the car alarm went off. As I reached for my keys to shut it off, I was tackled to the pavement. Apparently someone else owns a car identical to mine, and he has a violent temper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 85

My big day

By ReadyFreddy - 29/03/2025 12:00 - United States - North Hollywood

Today, I was starting a new job. I got up early, showered, did my hair, put on my uniform, had a good cry because I was scared/excited that I was starting a future where I will be financially free for the first time. Then my boss texted me because one of his back of house employees is sick and he can’t train me until tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 92

Hindrance

By Anonymous - 18/08/2022 06:00

Today, I haven’t spoken to my husband in a week, and when I finally spoke to him he thanked me because he’s gotten so much work done round the house, caught up on all his paperwork for his job, and reconnected with his Xbox friends. I didn’t realise I was such a fucking distraction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 432

You deserved it 1 670

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Birthday Family Miscellaneous Cute Friends Relatable My ex I need your advice Love NSFW Awkward Sex Intimacy Scary Technology Annoying Work Money Capitalism Embarrassing Divorce Education Health Sports Abuse Kids Hospital Wanker Addiction Management

The Top

Today, I asked the guy I share a desk with at work out because he has texted me a few times and seemed pretty into me. He said he doesn't date coworkers, even though the last 5 people he's dated have been coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 705

You deserved it 1 235

Today, while having sex for our first time, my boyfriend decided to test out a theory he heard about, that conversation during sex makes it more enjoyable. His way of doing it? He looked me straight in the eye and asked, "How 'bout them Brewers?" We're from Wisconsin. That's our local sports team. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 101

You deserved it 5 292

Today, I decided to surprise my husband in the shower. I got in and we were talking and goofing around and I stuck out my chest and sucked in my stomach being stupid, and my husband said, "Wait! Do it again! That's how you looked when I first met you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 072

You deserved it 12 125

Today, I've never been so lonely nor felt so romantically neglected as when I got married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 861

You deserved it 170

Today, my wife has moved into the guest room and has been giving me the cold shoulder ever since I asked for a paternity test for our kids. She swears she’s never cheated, so what’s she so offended for? Women make no sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 199

You deserved it 1 693

Today, I learned of my girlfriend’s affair with her coworker. And by coworker, I mean my long-time friend, who we helped get a job at her work in the first place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 573

You deserved it 60