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It's a trap!

By Anonymous - 09/08/2025 12:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was ranting to my friend on the phone about my toxic ex, calling him a “walking red flag with a God complex.” Mid-sentence, she cut me off, saying, “Uh… you're on speaker. He’s in the car with me.” He chimed in with, “I mean… fair enough.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 475

You deserved it 139

Not your fault

By Anonymous - 12/08/2025 17:00 - United States

Today, our family cat died. He had a disease (forget the name). My sister brought home a bunny, and I thought nothing of it until I tried to make the cat and the bunny friends. Sadly, it triggered his illness from stress, and he tragically passed away 4 days later. I still believe it's my fault; everyone says otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 407

You deserved it 141

Classic

By Anonymous - 14/08/2025 20:00 - United States - Seattle

Today, I met my new boss and went for a confident handshake. Somehow, we both missed completely and ended up awkwardly grabbing each other’s thumbs. Neither of us corrected it, so we just shook hands like we were in a masonic lodge. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 108

Lunch is on me

By Anonymous - 16/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, to eat healthy, I made myself a salad for lunch. While shaking the salad container, the lid popped off, sending lettuce, cucumbers and dressing all over my cubicle. My boss walked in just in time to see me wiping vinaigrette off of my keyboard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 340

You deserved it 161

Double standard

By Anonymous - 18/08/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I realized I sacrificed all my friends to make sure my marriage was successful, but sometimes when under extreme stress from my wife, I use the B-word and that’s enough for her to want to leave me. However, it’s perfectly fine for her to say "Fuck you" and that I’m a everything but a decent human being. FML

I agree, your life sucks 271

You deserved it 455

To each their own

By Geemee - 21/08/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, a guy I was into and who denied me because he “saw me as a friend only” began to date another girl. I asked him, “Why her and not me?” and he wouldn’t tell me. After pestering him, he finally caved in, saying, “Fine, plus sized girls are not my thing. Happy now?” So in other words, I have to lose weight to find love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 991

Don't freak out

By Anonymous - 25/08/2025 05:00 - United States - San Antonio

Today, I moved cities to live with the man whose baby I gave birth to two weeks ago. I found a bra that doesn’t belong to me in the dirty laundry hamper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 448

You deserved it 182

Soda Pop

By Anonymous - 28/08/2025 23:00 - United Kingdom

Today, it's 1:30 in the goddamn morning and I can’t sleep because my boyfriend is so obsessed with KPop Demon Hunters that he's in bed next to me listening to the songs with his headphones at full volume. He might actually be addicted, as he says he physically can’t make himself stop listening. FML

I agree, your life sucks 335

You deserved it 90

Hey good lookin'

By Anonymous - 30/08/2025 20:00 - United States

Today, I was doing squats at the gym. I caught my reflection in the mirror, got distracted by how awkward I looked, and lost my balance. I fell backward onto a medicine ball, rolled into another person’s legs, and took them down with me. We ended up in a sweaty heap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 273

I'm never going to live this down

By BubbleBladeBunz - 01/09/2025 15:00

Today, there's no door between the bathroom and bedroom. So far we've managed all number 2 s(h)ituations without trouble, but I'm on my period, which comes with period poops. He usually sleeps like the dead. I was mid-evacuation of a multi-missile launch when he sat up, wide awake, eye contact, grin on his face. "Hah! I KNEW YOU'D BE THE FIRST!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 110

Nope, not looking that up

By Anonymous - 03/09/2025 08:00 - United Kingdom - Castleford

Today, my brother let his kids watch anime without even looking at what they chose. He assumed it was OK because it’s just foreign cartoons. He is now blaming me for his kids' trauma, because I wasn’t there to warn him that "The Promised Neverland" isn’t just a Peter Pan rip off. IF YOU KNOW, YOU KNOW. FML

I agree, your life sucks 361

You deserved it 88

Flat on my ass

By Slipped - 05/09/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I went to a cook out and sat on a flimsy plastic chair. Halfway through my burger, the chair gave out, and I collapsed in front of everyone, still holding the burger. Someone shouted, “At least you saved the burger!” while everyone laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 348

You deserved it 110

Waste of time

By Anonymous - 06/09/2025 22:00 - Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my parents have separated. I stayed with them, living at home far too long for my own comfort, just to help them keep it together after they lost their remaining parents. Literally the month after I moved out, they decided it wasn't worth it. I now suspect they stayed together only because I still lived at home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 293

You deserved it 122

Because I got high

By Sam - 08/09/2025 03:00 - United States - Portland

Today, I was high on Marijuana and scrolling through Facebook when I couldn't figure out why I was seeing so much FML Posts no matter how far I scrolled and I was getting annoyed. Then I realized I was specifically on the FML Facebook Page and forgot because I was so high. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44

You deserved it 441

Paparazzo

By Paulalala - 10/09/2025 09:00 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I tried to take a photo of the guy next to me on the bus because he looked like one of the actors in Harry Potter. My flash went off, and the picture was so close-up it looked like I was documenting his acne. He glared at me for the rest of the ride, which was short because I got off at the next stop, nowhere near my destination. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40

You deserved it 555

Having a bad day?

By Anonymous - 13/09/2025 22:00

Today, one of my dogs spilled half my coffee at home. My other dog drank the rest of it. Went to Starbucks later, picked my coffee up off the counter, and the lid popped off, spilling all over the counter, floor and my hand. While they were making me a new one, I dropped my sandwich on the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267

You deserved it 149

Latte

By Latte - 15/09/2025 15:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I ordered my usual at my local coffee shop. The barista asked, “Name for the order?” For some reason, my brain short-circuited and I said, “Latte.” So they called out “Latte” when it was ready, and I had to shame-walk to the counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 234

You deserved it 215

Friendly friends

By Anonymous - 17/09/2025 12:00

Today, I was at a supermarket when I saw a guy waving enthusiastically at me. I waved back, smiling like an idiot. He kept waving, so I waved harder, even giving him the ole finger guns. Then his actual friend walked up behind me, and I realized he wasn’t waving at me at all. The cashier witnessed everything and whispered, “Yikes.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 310

A lot to deal with

By Anonymous - 21/09/2025 00:00

Today, my boyfriend of six years asked, "If you'd go somewhere, where'd you go?" Assumed he's planning our first big vacation, I said, "Somewhere warm, with water and beaches." Later I found out via social media that he's at the airport with a chick resembling our new neighbour. They're going to a romantic place with his boss. I also found out that I'm pregnant and unemployed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 476

You deserved it 136

Zero waste

By Van Raily - 22/09/2025 20:00

Today, at work, I had to shovel down 5 burgers, 3 (4 piece) nuggets, 8 regular fries, and 8 orange juices from McDonald's. When my officemates asked about my "food trip", I told them I was just really hungry. I couldn't tell them I only did this to complete the toy set. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55

You deserved it 647

Psyched

By Anonymous - 24/09/2025 15:00

Today, I was psyching myself up in the office bathroom mirror before a big presentation. I was doing power poses and whispering, “You’re smart, you’re powerful, you’re unstoppable.” When I turned around, three coworkers were waiting silently for the stalls, watching my whole performance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 385

Rat race

By Anonymous - 26/09/2025 09:00

Today, I work in sales and my coworker was activating two lines. A customer walks up to her and gets checked in. She finds out he wanted to activate as well. I was finishing up with a customer but instead of me helping this next guy, she made him wait for her instead. I got no sales today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 286

You deserved it 80

Doofus

By Pete - 28/09/2025 03:00

Today, I tried to make popcorn in the microwave but forgot to remove the plastic wrapper. The kitchen filled with smoke, the fire alarm went off and my neighbors came knocking to see if I was alright. When they asked what caused it, I had to admit that it was “Erm… popcorn.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 103

You deserved it 415

Almost famous

By Not on tiktok, never will - 29/09/2025 22:00

Today, someone asked for my autograph at the mall. Flattered, I signed their notebook and even posed for a selfie. Later I found out they'd thought I was some weird nerdy guy from TikTok. I’m not on TikTok. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 374

Business as usual

By Anonymous - 03/10/2025 12:00

Today, as usual, 90% of my interactions with my wife consist of her angrily ranting and complaining about things I can't control, like the weather, traffic, her son's dad, her insurance, etc. She never initiates any sort of affection and doesn't care about my needs, then wonders why I'm so depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 192

Always check where you're posting

By Jimbob - 08/10/2025 20:00

Today, I got a mass message on WhatsApp from my extended family about my cousin’s engagement. Trying to be funny, I replied, “Wow, can’t wait to see how long this one lasts.” I thought I was sending it to my brother. Only my brother. I sent it to the whole family group. Including my cousin. And her fiancé. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52

You deserved it 665

Leave us alone

By Ghabbie - 10/10/2025 15:00

Today, a lady tried to call the cops on me and "child services" because she thought I'd kidnapped my white son. I'm African-American and I'd adopted him. I even showed her the adoption decree, but according to her, "You can't fool me, it's AI-generated! I know how you people work!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 631

You deserved it 66

Doofus

By Jim - 14/10/2025 03:00

Today, I went to my favorite café to order my usual iced latte. The barista smiled and said, “The usual, right?” I nodded confidently, except she wasn’t talking to me. She handed the drink to the guy behind me and said, “Thanks, babe.” He winked at her. I just paid for my drink in silence, praying for a sinkhole to open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 112

Bad time for jokes

By David04 - 15/10/2025 22:00

Today, at the dentist, I was trying to make myself comfortable while he did his thing to my teeth. While my mouth was full of tools, he asked, “So how’s your day going so far?” My reply came out as, “Mrrgh purr blobby noff nay blobby blobby.” The dentist laughed and said, “I was kidding, you’re not supposed to talk right now.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 90

Nice family you've got there

By Anonymous - 18/10/2025 12:00

Today, after years of no contact, my brother texted me for my birthday. I replied, "You and your son are doing great I hope!" I then came to find out that he hasn't seen his son in 500 days and his ex refuses to let him see his son, since she has full custody and he is back on drugs. I didn't know and was genuinely hoping for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 367

You deserved it 82

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The Top

Today, a customer at work said his table was dirty. I asked which one he was sitting at so I could clean it for him. For some bizarre reason he got pissed and called my manager over. He ended up reporting us to corporate, and my manager got written up. He's blaming me for everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 862

You deserved it 3 666

Today, I woke up to my 7 year old son angrily trying to smother me with a pillow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 007

You deserved it 4 775

Today, my mom told me I was a bad daughter because I didn't get anything for my parents' anniversary. I just sent my brother a check for $400 for my share of their gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 349

You deserved it 3 093

Today, my mom tried to sell me a bag of rice, with "Cocaine" written on the side of it in sharpie pen. In exchange for my soul. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 415

You deserved it 4 105

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. By making out with her new boyfriend in front of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 932

You deserved it 3 071

Today, my family is on the third day of driving cross country. My husband is still pretending he is driving on a NASCAR track, sound effects and all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 373

You deserved it 4 507