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Keep busy, don't think of the void

By Anonymous - 02/11/2021 20:00

Today, we had a meeting at work, during which I got reprimanded for "disappearing." I'm the only one who constantly stays busy, since I'm broken in a way that my self-worth directly correlates with how productive I am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 887

You deserved it 136

It's not the size that counts

By Leo Scofield - 29/08/2020 02:00

Today, I came home to find out my roommate had sex in my bed, because he didn't want his date to know he has a smaller bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 079

You deserved it 162

Technologically challenged

By Anonymous - 14/01/2026 12:00

Today I booked an Airbnb for a few days and the instructions for the television were a laminated sheet saying, “It’s a tv, not a supercomputer, figure it out snowflake!” I can’t work out how to move it from Sky to Netflix; I’ve tried every possible button, menu, and setting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 333

You deserved it 136

Bed of nails

By JoanT - 01/09/2020 08:01 - United States - Kailua Kona

Today, my boyfriend’s bed is so uncomfortable that even after six months of not seeing him, I’m sleeping on the floor so I can actually get some sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 247

You deserved it 210

Family portrait

By Anonymous - 01/07/2024 06:00 - United States - Goose Creek

Today, my husband left our bedroom to go turn the thermostat down in the hall. I let out the smelliest fart, so bad that I had to blame it on our baby. He laughed and said, "I leave for one second and come back and it smells like a sewer in here." FML

I agree, your life sucks 129

You deserved it 534

Show yourself!

By Coneer - 19/01/2026 09:00

Today, I told an employee to turn her camera on during a meeting when she worked remote. Since she refused to turn it on, I questioned the veracity of whether she was actually working at home, so I threatened to take disciplinary action. She responded by filing a complaint to HR. FML

I agree, your life sucks 190

You deserved it 599

Bureaucracy sucks

By Anonymous - 12/12/2021 01:57

Today, I got let go from work all because my work permit expired. I’ve been in the process of renewal with USCIS for over 10 months now, but things are delayed due to COVID. I showed them the notice of renewal, they said it wasn’t enough, “Rules are rules.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 145

You deserved it 128

Meanwhile, at Harvard…

By 552220000 - This FML is from back in 2018 but it's good stuff

Today, I raised my hand to answer a question, but I forgot the answer, so when the teacher called on me, I just said, "I need to pee." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 703

You deserved it 628

More faces than Khloé Kardashian

By Anonymous - 03/09/2020 08:00 - United States - Bronx

Today, my mom told me she'd scheduled me for a cleaning with my hometown dentist. When I reminded her that, according to my university's COVID guidelines, students shouldn't leave the county unless there's an emergency, she threw a hissy fit and told me I'm being "combative" and "looking for an excuse to fight." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 427

You deserved it 220

No dog for you

By Anonymous - 21/11/2021 14:01 - United States - Seattle

Today, I asked my landlord if I could get a dog. He said no, and gave me an illegal rent increase. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 058

You deserved it 147

By çapousse2904 - 12/09/2014 05:45 - France - Le Pr?-saint-gervais

Today, my girlfriend put her hand on my abs and confessed that she was glad I'd secretly started working out. I couldn't bring myself to admit that I've been constipated for three weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 192

You deserved it 4 065

Great gift idea!

By Anonymous - 15/09/2020 14:02 - New Zealand

Today, it was my birthday and my first present was finding out that my girlfriend of five years has been cheating on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 661

You deserved it 121

Death cult

By Anonymous - 27/11/2021 05:01

Today, my aunt told me that I'm dead to her now and not to visit them ever again. Why? She found out that I'm pro-choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 121

You deserved it 342

Like a dog

By Jick - 26/02/2023 14:00

Today, I was outside when I was suddenly overcome by an intense need to shit. The back door was locked, so I tried to run to the front, but couldn't make it. As I squatted in the bushes, my girlfriend came home unexpectedly. She screamed and called me a sick, disgusting freak. FML

I agree, your life sucks 800

You deserved it 301

Be careful what you wish for

By lordoftheweird - 21/07/2024 00:00 - Canada - Kamloops

Today, my mom is upset that she can't get a date, but my dad can. This is the woman who doesn't shower, has a drug problem, and was arrested for spying on a local kindergartener. She was the one who demanded a polyamorous relationship. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 101

Get tested

By Anonymous - 11/02/2026 12:00

Today, I found out my ex was sleeping around with others without a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 327

You deserved it 72

In for the long haul

By PoopyNuts - 18/09/2020 23:01

Today, my very financially stable grandparents bought my girlfriend and I two first class tickets on Air Emirates, which to me is a once in a lifetime opportunity. To my dismay, my colon did not approve of the peanuts and I spent the whole flight shitting out what seemed to be molten rocks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 419

You deserved it 231

Extreme reaction

By KCS - 04/03/2023 18:00 - Australia

Today, I discovered I'm allergic to the new perfume I bought and now I smell like a hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 925

You deserved it 152

Classic rookie mistake

By Mason - 31/12/2021 10:59 - United States - Boise

Today, I got new AirPods. As I was sitting on the toilet, they fell out of my hoodie pocket into the toilet while it was flushing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 980

By PTKFML - 26/07/2009 04:37 - United States

Today, while in the middle of having sex with my husband, instead of saying something sexy in my ear, he whispered, "We are so gonna make pizza after this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 854

You deserved it 7 628

By Rhyno - 05/05/2009 15:37 - United States

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 309 408

You deserved it 65 882

Unpaid

By Anonymous - 12/01/2022 10:59

Today, I informed my daughter-in-law that I’m a granny, not an unpaid, on-call 24/7 babysitter, and no, I will not be babysitting her kids all day so she can go to an all-day brunch with her similarly selfish girlfriends. She threw an actual tantrum and threatened to put me in a home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 616

You deserved it 189

Adulting is tough

By Anonymous - 10/08/2024 00:00 - Canada

Today, in last ditch attempt to be an adult, I trotted out to do my grocery shopping for the week. As I confidently strode through the produce aisle, I grabbed what I thought was a nice, ripe mango. At checkout, the cashier kindly informed me it was in fact a massive potato. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107

You deserved it 567

What did you do?

By Anonymous - 07/03/2026 00:00

Today, I found out that my (amazing) adoptive parents are going to be investigated by CPS and no one's telling me why. I'm terrified I'm going to be taken away and end up back in foster care again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 555

You deserved it 69

By birthdayfun - 23/03/2009 22:46 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My mom decided to wake me up by having our new, previously stray, cat thrown on top of me. I was awoken to two claws ripping across my face which needed 16 stitches to fix. Happy Birthday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153 466

You deserved it 8 201

I'm woke now

By Anonymous - 15/08/2024 00:00

Today, my cat woke me up a few minutes before my alarm, so I got up, had a pee, brushed my teeth, got dressed, went downstairs and fed her, started to make a coffee, and glanced at my phone clock. IT'S ONLY 01:30 IN THE FRICKING MORNING, MY ALARM DOESN’T GO OFF FOR ANOTHER 5 HOURS! DAMN CAT! FML

I agree, your life sucks 223

You deserved it 507

Distant love

By jadalaheart - 28/12/2019 03:00 - United States - Citrus Heights

Today, for the first time in more than two years, a guy asked me out. Too bad he lives halfway around the world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 820

You deserved it 209

Cruisin' for a bruisin'

By ProvenPoint - 27/03/2023 10:00

Today, while discussing difficulties in relationships, I cautiously suggested to my best friend that he may not have the healthiest way of resolving conflicts. He got angry at me for not understanding him but refused to tell where he felt misunderstood, then gave me the silent treatment. Way to prove a point, dear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 737

You deserved it 115

Uncle Fester

By Anonymous - 16/03/2026 15:00

Today, my asshole uncle stole the painkillers I was prescribed after my surgery. To top it all off, the pharmacy called CPS on my mom when she attempted to replace them because they thought she was lying, so they're going to be investigating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 63

Dog Fail

By FML Videos - 13/11/2018 00:30 - United States - New York

Living that clumsy life!

I agree, your life sucks 246

You deserved it 93

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The Top

Today, my father informed me that I will have no chance of dating a good man if I keep up with these interracial relationships. And that he won't be supporting me through college if I continue this "rebellion." My boyfriend is half black and loves the same music, sports, and movies as my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 880

You deserved it 2 063

Today, the ex-girlfriend I'm still in love with sent me an old picture with the caption, "I miss us." She looked beautiful and happy. Too bad I'm not the guy she's kissing in the picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 583

You deserved it 3 804

Today, I found out that I'm named after my dad's favourite drink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 393

You deserved it 47

Today, I did my work, the work of my co-worker who called in sick and the work of my boss who has no idea what the hell is going on all at the same time. I didn't get a promotion because I don't work hard enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 383

You deserved it 3 217

Today, I had a bad fight with my brother. He started screaming at me, then I hear, "Sam your mic is unmuted." The fight was about him telling my dad that I'm pansexual. I came out to my whole class and my dad. By accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 955

You deserved it 538

Today, I received a text from my boyfriend breaking up with me. Not only was this a bit cowardly but he'd also sent it in a reply to our last interaction on our phones, a group chat with some of our friends, who started commenting with sad face emojis before I had even had the chance to see it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 80