Work: Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed,... - FML

By bglenney - 15/08/2013 09:47 - United States

Today, for the first time in my life, I simultaneously sneezed, peed and farted. I was giving a presentation at work when this happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 955

You deserved it 4 192

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Same thing different taste

Let it all out

By Anonymous - 25/03/2023 22:00 - Australia

Today, I was in a meeting with my boss and some new clients when I sensed that I was about to sneeze. I tried to hold it in, but ended up sneezing AND farting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 850

You deserved it 145

By Anonymous - 01/02/2010 19:29 - United Kingdom

Today, I was giving a class presentation, when I suddenly sneezed so hard I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 908

You deserved it 4 115

Go big or go home

By kinwar - 27/09/2021 07:01 - United States - Hamburg

Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 131

Both ends

By Anon - 19/06/2024 12:00 - United States - Birmingham

Today, I was in a meeting when I felt a sneeze coming on. I tried to hold it in to avoid making a noise. Instead, I ended up sneeze-imploding so hard that I accidentally farted at the same time. The entire room went silent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 466

You deserved it 142

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 124

You deserved it 402

Faulty plumbing

By Anonymous - 08/02/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 118

Say it, don't spray it

By Anonymous - 05/05/2024 00:00 - Australia

Today, I was giving a presentation in front of my class. Mid-speech, I felt a sudden urge to sneeze and tried to hold it in. Instead, I let out the most obnoxious, window-rattling sneeze imaginable, complete with a spray of snot, which landed on my notes. I think I traumatized my classmates for life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 123

By SoSoRachel - 31/10/2012 21:03 - United States - Dunlap

Today, while giving a speech at work, I started sneezing. After what seemed to be the last sneeze, I went on talking. Apparently it wasn't, and I blew out my eardrum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 396

You deserved it 1 898

By Anonymous - 30/09/2013 16:22 - United States - Union

Today, while in class, I had to sneeze. Not wanting to make a lot of noise, I held it in, only to instead let out a huge, long fart. Everyone, including the teacher, turned and stared at me intently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 381

You deserved it 8 117

No laugh track required

By Anonymous - 06/05/2025 03:00 - United States

Today, I sneezed so hard at work that I farted. In the silence in our open space office that followed, my boss looked over, smiled, and said, "Bless you?" The people in the office who weren't wearing headphones burst out laughing, then those people noticed the laughter, took their headphones off, and my boss then had to explain to them why they were laughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 502

You deserved it 132

Next

Top comments

Capt_Oblivious 10

Thursday 15 August 2013 15:55

Sparted

ViRepz 28

Thursday 15 August 2013 15:53

There has to be a term for that, like there is for sharted?

Comments

thatnucca 36

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:05

Well damn! Did anyone applaud?

Jst4kicks 16

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:06

at least it makes for a funny story.... for your coworkers at least

gregnc_fml 18

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:11

Theres nothing like a humorous moment in a boring presentation to spice it up. I'm sure it will be a well remembered presentation!

NatalieOntheTram 11

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:12

That's talent right there! Clearly, you're a very gifted multi-tasker. Shouldn't your place of work appreciate that?

perdix 29

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:13

You should have asked for a raise. With that kind of talent, you will surely be in high demand.

EvilLittleMan 23

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:20

Now that right there boys and girls is what you call a Trifecta !

perdix 29

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:21

There's a woman in Vegas who takes in small audiences (maybe 10-12 people)and for the price of admission, shows off her squirting ability. Maybe you can be an opening act for her?

RedPillSucks 31

Thursday 15 August 2013 18:43

People pay to see this?

MissCharlotte_fml 26

Thursday 15 August 2013 20:14

Perdix, you know this why...?

graceinsheepwear 33

Thursday 15 August 2013 22:42

Squirters who are so inclined can absolutely make money with it. There is definitely a market. Check craigslist.

sematariux 7

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:24

That had to be decently impressive, OP.

VancouverGuy89 9

Thursday 15 August 2013 16:59

At least you didn't shit yourself at the same time

Neesalun 20

Thursday 15 August 2013 17:02

Lol! Been there. Done that.

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Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 259

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Today, I got in a car accident on the way to work. I received an abusive phone call from my boss saying he shouldn't have to cover my lazy ass. I was driving to cover his shift because he was too drunk to show up to work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 936

You deserved it 3 196

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Today, my son drank a bottle of hot sauce. It wasn't a dare, he actually thought that it would give him a fever so that he could skip school tomorrow. This idiot is 15 years old. FML

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You deserved it 5 181

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I agree, your life sucks 5 379

You deserved it 396

Today, I waited 7 hours for my mom to come home and give me my computer back. 15 minutes after she got home, I remembered that I had hidden my computer myself so she wouldn't take it. FML

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