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Public freakout

By Rem - 26/10/2025 15:00

Today, I had to bail my husband out from jail for almost killing someone. What happened? He and my sister-in-law were in an grocery store when she spotted his old high school nemesis, who back then was the biggest bully in school. She thought that it would be "exciting" to see what would happen if their paths crossed again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 403

You deserved it 74

Culture wars

By Anonymous - 04/11/2025 09:00

Today, to get revenge on our kids for constantly annoying her with that "6, 7" bullshit, my wife has decided to speak only in 90s slang and Pauly Shore quotes. I feel like I haven’t had a normal conversation in weeks! I’m losing my fucking mind! FML

I agree, your life sucks 389

You deserved it 103

Wise words of wisdom to consider

By Anonymous - 01/12/2025 00:00

Today, I realized that in some of my early relationships the girls were so possessive and pushed for merger and marriage that they scared me, so now I can only be reliably attracted to women who don't want me. The slightest sign of interest in more than a fling and I'm out. It's been like this for 30 years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 119

You deserved it 421

Preppers, man

By Bad at adulting - 04/12/2025 15:00

Today, I attempted meal prepping to “get my life together.” Within an hour I'd burned rice, melted a plastic spatula, and discovered I’d seasoned chicken with powdered sugar instead of salt. My smoke alarm and my stomach filed complaints. FML

I agree, your life sucks 161

You deserved it 368

Gaming the system

By Anonymous - 06/12/2025 09:00

Today, I indulged in some online gambling. I wisely only spent $100 and won, quite a bit; I even wisely withdrew 2/3rds of the money into my bank account. Thing is I'm on SSI, which requires me to keep a maximum amount of money in my bank; if it goes over I get cut off. Now I'm scrambling to spend my winnings. FML

I agree, your life sucks 113

You deserved it 410

Dodge

By Steve - 17/12/2025 00:00

Today, a girl I knew in high school who now lives out of state came to town to visit and stay over. We've been talking albeit romantically for the past few months. Not thirty minutes after we arrived at my place from the airport, her ex-boyfriend came by and she hopped in his car. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 406

You deserved it 103

Sitcom moment

By Anonymous - 29/12/2025 09:00

Today, my friends were criticizing me, a 36 year-old man hitting on a 22 year-old I met at a bar. I brought up that she’s a consenting adult. One of them responded, “Dude, the year she was born, you were old enough to jerk off and your voice was dropping… isn’t that a turnoff for you?” FML

I agree, your life sucks 183

You deserved it 729

It's Klug

By Anonymous - 31/12/2025 03:00

Today, I brought leftovers to work in a Tupperware container for my lunch. When I opened the container in the break room, it smelled so bad everyone stopped talking. Someone asked if something was spoiled. It wasn’t. It was just my lunch. I ate it anyway, alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 360

Stop pointing out my shortcomings

By Anonymous - 05/01/2026 12:00

Today, of all the things I have to be self-conscious about (my looks, my weight, my mental health…), I now have to be self-conscious of my breathing, because my brother says it’s “painful to listen to.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 109

Is this another Tictac thing?

By Anonymous - 25/01/2026 00:00

Today, my girlfriend hit me on the head with a frying pan for a funny video, because she thought it would go bonk and make me do a funny reaction. She must be a new kind of stupid cause I got four stitches, a hairline fracture, and a headache. FML

I agree, your life sucks 598

You deserved it 88

Al Pacino over here

By Anonymous - 28/01/2026 12:00

Today, after being a dad to five girls for over 40 years, I finally had a son with my new wife. Too bad I'm 78 years-old and probably won't be around long to enough to enjoy having a boy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 110

You deserved it 813

Let it out

By Depressed af - 06/02/2026 09:00

Today, I'd built up the courage to talk to my doctor about anxiety, even rehearsing what to say. When she asked, “So what brings you in today?” I immediately burst into tears, said, “I don’t know,” then apologized for crying. She handed me tissues and said, “This happens a lot,” which somehow made me cry harder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 105

Family

By You're next, ex-mom! - 08/02/2026 03:00

Today, I came home to see my house trespassed, vandalized, and looted by my cousin, whom I have always hated, and his friends. As I get the cops to haul them to jail, he got kicked out from home for the Nth time and said my mom invited them. When I confronted my mom about it, she dismissed it saying, "He's family!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 430

You deserved it 81

Ironic

By Pookie - 09/02/2026 22:00

Today, I saw someone at the buffet get two plates in a row. I told my date that, “People nowadays have no self control.” Unbeknownst to me, he was within earshot and told me, “FYI, I was getting a plate for my disabled mother.” After dinner, my date unmatched me and blocked my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50

You deserved it 1 161

Target goals

By Anonymous - 17/03/2026 15:00

Today, I officially completed my weight loss journey, only for my wife, who'd previously threatened to divorce me if I didn't lose weight, to tell me that she realized she liked me better when I was fat and that "you don't know what you have until it's gone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 522

You deserved it 75

Attachment issues

By Anonymous - 26/03/2026 12:00

Today, I'm stuck in a nightmare where one of my young twins is fixated on spending as much time with her sibling as possible, while the other one is a complete introvert who wants her sister to leave her alone as much as possible. Either way, someone is upset and crying, mostly me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 94

Thanks Grandma

By Anonymous - 11/04/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, my husband and I had to cancel our family Disney World trip because my mom stole and gambled away all of our spending money. Our kids are still crying and throwing tantrums and don't understand why we can't afford to go anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 528

You deserved it 85

Crashing out

By Anonymous - 22/04/2026 12:00 - United States - Westminster

Today, I was working at 5 am at my office desk when I heard trickling water. I ran to the foyer, turned on the light, expecting to see my incontinent 16 year-old golden retriever. Instead, I witnessed my still drunk, high and comatose husband standing at the top of the stairs pissing on the carpet stairs. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 474

You deserved it 126

Victoria?

By Anonymous - 12/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I got married and my mom refused to be there because my dad, whose guts she hates, was there even though I promised repeatedly that I would keep them apart. I couldn't do the mother-son dance. She keeps insisting that it was a "lapse in judgment." Yeah, like we're really going to be able to have a do-over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 383

You deserved it 76

Everyone's a critic

By Anonymous - 17/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I was walking past a restaurant to my car. Some man who was sitting on the patio went completely out of his way to walk through the restaurant, out the door, and follow me halfway down the street, just to tell me that my hair was ugly, my makeup was too thick, and my dress was “slutty.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 414

You deserved it 90

Wouldn't you?

By Anonymous - 28/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my son (17) lied about not being able to get the time off from his job for our family vacation and has been partying and screwing his girlfriend while we're thousands of miles away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 492

BYOKA

By Anonymous - 06/06/2026 03:00 - United States

Today, I’m so embarrassed I can barely believe it: I was out on a date and he asked the waitress to bring a pitcher of water and extra sugar packets. He took two Kool-Aid packets from his pocket and mixed it up right there at the table, proudly stating he didn’t need to pay for drinks now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 412

You deserved it 94

One step at a time

By shengming - 05/07/2025 22:00 - China

Today, I was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. Although I am very happy in a sense and feel that there is finally an explanation for the past, this issue is not conducive to my adjustment to society. FML

I agree, your life sucks 371

You deserved it 101

Walk it off

By Anonymous - 08/10/2025 03:00

Today, while helping my wife clean the bathroom, I stepped in a puddle of neat bleach she'd randomly left by the shower door. I washed it off straight away but now an hour later I have burns on the bottom of my foot and can’t put weight on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 377

You deserved it 66

BBFs

By Anonymous - 19/10/2025 15:00

Today, I was hanging with my lesbian friend, who I am secretly in love with. I bought her flowers, took her out to eat, and we held hands all through dinner. We met up with our friends later and she told them what we did, then said, "Isn't she the best friend ever? I'm so glad I have an honorary sister like her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 227

You deserved it 379

Why though?

By Anonymous - 23/10/2025 03:00

Today, my best friend of over 16 years is getting married. I was supposed to be her Maid of Honor. Instead I was uninvited a few weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 347

You deserved it 100

Unwelcome

By Anonymous - 28/10/2025 12:00

Today, for my birthday, my mum got me a puppy. I have never expressed any interest in owning a dog. She insists it’s a thoughtful gift but when I look at it, all I see is a bunch of responsibility, training it, extra bills, smells, taking it for walks, chewed furniture. Bollocks to this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 523

You deserved it 108

How the turntables…

By Anonymous - 24/11/2025 00:00

Today, I learned that the girl who severely bullied me in highschool for being a lesbian just came out as a lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 436

You deserved it 79

Ten pages?

By Anonymous - 17/12/2025 03:00

Today, I emailed my resume to a recruiter but attached a ten-page stream-of-consciousness grocery list instead. The recruiter replied, “Interesting priorities.” Now I’m on a three-email chain where everyone is debating whether olives belong in banana bread and asking about my sandwich preferences. FML

I agree, your life sucks 94

You deserved it 392

Moving on fast

By Anonymous - 09/01/2026 03:00

Today, my dad's new girlfriend, who he met in Vegas, flies in. My mother is still alive in a dementia care facility. I don't know how to feel about this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 67

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The Top

Today, I found out my ex-boyfriend is getting engaged. He broke up with me five months ago because our relationship was too serious for him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 948

You deserved it 2 779

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. Afterwards we went to Applebee's for dinner, then after we'd ate I asked, "How was it?" he says, "It was terrible", to which I said, "The food was that bad?" He replies, "No, the sex". FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 036

You deserved it 13 847

Today, I got fired for not being mature enough. I just found out I’m pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 769

You deserved it 425

Today, I dropped and snapped a carving knife that’s been in my girlfriend's family for generations, and is used to carve the meat every Christmas. I'm a huge coward, so I hid it back in its box but when it gets taken out again Christmas Day 2022, I think I’m a dead man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 1 486

Today, the guy I was talking to for about 3 years, started dating in December, and was super happy about it, told my friends, and he told me he loved me within the first week, has now broken up with me. All because I "said I love you too quickly." He said it first and now his friends think I'm batshit crazy. Is he a dick or am I overreacting? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 056

You deserved it 140

Today, I left my four month-old daughter with my boyfriend of three weeks so I could go shopping in peace. I came home four hours later to find her screaming, hungry, with a dirty diaper. When I asked why he didn't do anything to help her, he said, "Why should I? She's not my kid." FML

I agree, your life sucks 220

You deserved it 1 960