When you miss your train By Lewis - 14/12/2018 18:00 Apparently he misses it very much... I agree, your life sucks 281 You deserved it 81 Share Tweet Share
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML I agree, your life sucks 616 You deserved it 92
Today, I had a date with this guy. I waited at the restaurant for an hour and he didn't show. Thinking he stood me up, I went over to his place and keyed his car. Then I realized the date was for tomorrow. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 172 You deserved it 154 533
Today, I went into my kitchen after placing a line of salt across the floor in front of the back door the night before to ward off slugs that keep getting in, only to find 12 idiotic slugs dead and shrivelled up, leaving a horrible gooey mess. I don't know why I expected any intelligence from them. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 279 You deserved it 2 106
Today, I received a promotional message offering a half-off deal on an expensive coffee maker. The only reason why I received the message is because I bought that same coffee maker yesterday and I signed up to their mailing list. FML I agree, your life sucks 28 300 You deserved it 2 923
Today, my boss - AKA Satan - told me I'd better watch out, because I'm now top on his list of people to lay off next time the company downsizes. All I did was give a report to the board admitting that our sales are down this year. He blames me for making him look bad. FML I agree, your life sucks 40 920 You deserved it 3 785
Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML I agree, your life sucks 48 180 You deserved it 21 425
Today, I finally got up the courage to talk to my four-year boyfriend about how insecure I've been feeling in our relationship recently, and how I needed his support while I try to get my self-esteem back on-track. He fell asleep mid-conversation. FML I agree, your life sucks 42 123 You deserved it 5 286
Today, my husband broke the vase and smashed the chandelier in the hallway, all because I asked him who he was on the phone with. His exact words were, “Do you ever just mind your fucking business? Goddamn!” Oh, and he told me I have to buy a new vase and replace the chandelier. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 149 You deserved it 212
I guess his plans got derailed.
Wow he was really training to get there🤣🤣