Sex and Intimacy: Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never...

By Anonymous - 26/03/2009 16:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend came up to me and told me we would never do anything sexual in our relationship. She said I was too adorable to take seriously in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137 118

You deserved it 10 558

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 11/09/2009 17:04 - United States

Today, I went to my girlfriend's and she was wearing some sexy lingerie. After making out passionately for 10 minutes, I started to undress myself, only to have her stop me, confessed that she still wasn't sexually attracted to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 354

You deserved it 4 029

By beaverless - 02/05/2011 20:26 - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly broke the news to me that she doesn't want to take part in any sexual activity anymore because it's getting too boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 597

You deserved it 17 611

By Malarky - 23/06/2016 19:10 - United States

Today, I had a cute girl over and we cuddled on my bed. Later she texted me that she had decided that she didn't want to ever do that again because it turned her on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 263

You deserved it 1 240

Time is money

By asdfasdf - 24/01/2009 15:14 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 252

You deserved it 5 978

By Magnus_the_Red - 09/09/2009 04:13 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she didn't want to get it on with me because she didn't want to "ruin my innocence." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 638

You deserved it 3 991

Bored

By Taylor parsons - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm not in the mood anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 467

You deserved it 7 546

By anonymous - 20/02/2010 01:47 - Ireland

Today, while in bed with my game-obsessed girlfriend, she told me I was a "noob" in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 491

You deserved it 6 772

By Anonymous - 10/02/2015 14:51 - United Kingdom - Cambridge

Today, a cute girl was telling me about her weird fetishes. I jokingly said, "Remind me never to have sex with you". She replied, "Don't worry, I have standards". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 512

You deserved it 20 944

Hang ups

By at least put on sexy underwear - 01/09/2023 20:00

Today, my girlfriend complained that we never have sex anymore. The only way she ever wants sex is missionary, with barely any foreplay. When I asked if we could spice things up and mentioned a few simple ideas, she said the conversation was making her uncomfortable and changed the subject. FML

I agree, your life sucks 634

You deserved it 136

Confusing

By so confused - 09/12/2023 15:00 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me she was sexually frustrated. Naturally, I started coming on to her, only for her to shove me away and snap that just because she was sexually frustrated, it didn't mean that she wanted sex. Huh? FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 237

Murphy_21 0

Friday 27 March 2009 0:02

In my experience its the adorable ones that make the best lovers. She's missing out.

Shadowflames420 0

Friday 27 March 2009 0:01

She cheating on you.

Comments

nodbor 11

Friday 27 March 2009 5:17

you should have told her to put it to a test. a girl, that was actually hanging around me, called me a little puppy to a girlfriend of hers, I showed her the wolf in me. after two weeks of sex she told me that she could not keep up with me, even said I lied about being a virgin. I was a virgin. she was 23 to my 18 years old.

wrestler_fml 0

Friday 27 March 2009 5:18

"Today, I broke up with my girlfriend for being a prude jerk, and ended up making out with the sexy girl who likes me right in front of her, some time days later" sounds good? yeahhhh brah! make it happen!

anon12_fml 0

Friday 27 March 2009 5:25

What does OP stand for?

effthis 0

Friday 27 March 2009 5:51

lol? ask for just once.. then screw the shit out of her..

puffingdragons 0

Friday 27 March 2009 6:11

#76 OP = Opening Post. I believe.

BipolarBettie 0

Friday 27 March 2009 6:23

The reason why is because she has seen you naked; i have used that on guys who were too small or something looked wrong with it

Lou_Briccant 0

Friday 27 March 2009 6:24

#76 OP is Original Poster, ie: The guy who made the thread/FML. And this sounds like a joke that the OP took too seriously, like alot of FMLs I see popping up. Don't quote me on that though, I could be wrong.