Miscellaneous: Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of... - FML

By guessthatsatrickthen - 31/10/2015 17:19 - United Kingdom - Leeds

Today, I opened the door to what I thought would be a group of trick or treaters. It was actually a naked man. He wanted to come in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 199

You deserved it 1 977

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Same thing different taste

Why hello there...

By Shocked - 28/01/2018 19:00

Today, while looking at a house to buy, I opened a bathroom door. There was a naked man on the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 709

You deserved it 436

By Anonymous - 10/04/2011 06:05 - United States

Today, a stoned man tried to break into my house. Naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 314

You deserved it 4 524

By Anonymous - 08/10/2012 22:27 - Canada - Truro

Today, my friends dared me to answer the door naked for the pizza guy. I heard the doorbell but when I answered, it was the little boy from next door participating in a fundraiser. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 739

You deserved it 40 640

By hellphone_fml - 01/07/2019 20:00

Today, someone knocked on my door. I yelled "Yeah?" while getting up, since it was locked. My grandpa walked in, as I apparently didn't actually lock it. I was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 392

You deserved it 670

Yes problem

By DarkDolly - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - France

Today, at around 2am, I was walking through a parking lot to my car when a man walking behind me told me not to be scared. I turned around to tell him there was no problem. He was naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 447

You deserved it 3 237

By Lilly_28 - 11/08/2009 14:01 - United States

Today, I was home alone. I didn't expect anyone to be anywhere near home, so when I got out of the shower, I walked to the living room, naked, to get the tv remote for my room. Only to find the UPS guy standing at our glass front door. I screamed... so did he. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 010

You deserved it 18 462

Maze

By Anonymous - 28/07/2015 18:55 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while in a hotel, I left the room to get some ice. Since my parents left the door wedged open, I didn't worry about trying to find the room number. Without thinking, I walked in to another room that was also wedged open. Yes, there were people in it, and yes, they were both naked and hairy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 984

You deserved it 9 229

By anonymous - 16/11/2011 03:17 - Canada

Today, I was naked, still deciding what to wear, when the doorbell rang. I grabbed the closest thing to cover up with: my Snuggie. I answered the door, it was kids asking for donations. Without thinking, I turned around to grab my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 460

You deserved it 33 939

By noooo - 08/08/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 044

You deserved it 2 712

By trickortreat - 01/11/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, while up in my room getting ready to go out, I thought I heard some trick or treaters knocking on the door. I ignored them because I didn't have any candy. The knocking got louder and longer. I walked downstairs, and noticed that the living room ceiling was falling down onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 591

You deserved it 5 096

Next

Top comments

LadyKayDee 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:31

Maybe he wanted to give you some of his candy...

jayennachristine 23

Sunday 1 November 2015 15:32

trick or treat...or anal?

Comments

darshini_ii 24

Sunday 1 November 2015 19:03

Follow up please

flowerfliff 18

Sunday 1 November 2015 19:12

Wow, what a legend!

vikky538 28

Sunday 1 November 2015 19:24

And I guess he is not holding the candy bag in his hands either

trucker2 33

Sunday 1 November 2015 19:45

He wanted to share his whatchamacallit with you...

nreed32 20

Sunday 1 November 2015 20:15

I'm here for the gangbang

watermelon_bae 15

Sunday 1 November 2015 20:34

Check whose at your door, out the window before you open it.

saberjpg 6

Sunday 1 November 2015 20:58

The "Naked Man". It works 2 out of 3 times, guaranteed. #howimetyourmother

ILikeKoalas 24

Sunday 1 November 2015 21:28

The poor children! I hope they didn't see him.

youraveragehuman 16

Sunday 1 November 2015 22:28

The naked man works 2/3 times

Beckettze 5

Sunday 1 November 2015 22:59

did you let him in?

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Today, I went on a date with a guy who seemed to be quite the gentleman. I was proven wrong when he told me to "shut it" during dinner, stiffed me on the bill, and then left me at the restaurant so he could get his own taxi home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 896

You deserved it 5 109

Today, I tried to get my girlfriend of nine months to have oral sex with me. She was eating a hot dog. She then said, "If you ask me again, this is what I'll do to you." She then bit the hot dog in half. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 468

You deserved it 38 985

Today, on my 18th birthday, my mom told me the man I thought was my father for 18 years was actually not my father, and my real father was in prison for murder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 127

You deserved it 2 132

Today, as my dad was handing me my Christmas gift, he pats me on the shoulder and says, "These were mine, hope you enjoy them as much as I did." Thinking it was something special of his he wanted to hand down to me, I quickly unwrapped the box only to find old 70's porn. Merry Christmas? FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 593

You deserved it 3 401

Today, a very large guy came up and asked if I was Luke. Before I could explain that Luke’s my cousin and that we do look like twins, he picked me up off the ground and hung me by my belt loops from a metal fence, telling me to stay away from his aunt. I had to undo my pants in public to climb down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 505

You deserved it 134

Today, a punk-looking college kid was making fun of my mentally handicapped son. Out of anger, I punched him in the face. I got handcuffed and thrown into a police car. The kid stood there laughing and pointing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 666

You deserved it 10 159