Intimacy: Thanks, auntie

Thanks, auntie

By itwasmyfavoriteshirt - 16/08/2012 19:28 - United States - Bentonville

Today, my aunt borrowed my favorite shirt. Don't worry, she returned it. Complete with jizz stains. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 182

You deserved it 3 712

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

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Same thing different taste

By ewwy - 10/10/2010 06:54 - United States

Today, I returned a friend's jacket after borrowing it. I made sure to wash it and keep it clean. When he went to put it on, a pair of my granny panties fell out of the sleeve. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 012

You deserved it 7 665

By bubblebuttfuckfart - 13/10/2012 17:32 - Ireland

Today, my aunt brought me a birthday present. I quickly figured out that she'd simply returned the jacket I let her borrow two years ago for my brother's graduation party. It reeks of cigarette smoke and alcohol. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 565

You deserved it 1 777

By I'm disgusting - 26/05/2019 22:11

Today, my girlfriend caught me using my T-shirt as a tissue. Again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 539

You deserved it 3 257

Oblivious

By Anonymous - 24/02/2025 12:00 - Slovenia - Ljubljana

Today, my ex and I had sex. Afterwards, I cleaned myself with a t-shirt and left a huge sperm stain on the front of it. After that, my stepfather came home, so we left. As we were sitting in the car in front of the house, my stepfather left on a bicycle, wearing the t-shirt. Sunlight reflected off the stain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 122

You deserved it 467

Classic

By Anonymous - 13/10/2025 00:00

Today, I threw all my clothes into the washer, including my favorite red hoodie. Apparently, I forgot a Kleenex in one of the pockets. I now own a wardrobe of pink, soggy tissue confetti-covered gunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 333

By IHateMySister - 02/01/2016 10:36 - Denmark - Kirke-hyllinge

Today, my sister confessed that when she runs out of clean underwear, she uses mine. That wouldn't be so bad if she didn't also put it back in my dresser afterwards so I wouldn't notice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 854

You deserved it 1 366

Spunky

By grimatwork - 01/11/2010 17:24 - United Kingdom

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 469

You deserved it 5 453

Let's get you home Grandma

By Ima_Moronski - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went shopping with my grandma. She went to the bathroom and was gone for a long while. I jokingly asked, "What happened, you fall in?" She did. She had shit all over the back of her shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 834

You deserved it 7 226

W.T.F.

By Anonymous - 15/09/2018 06:00

Today, while getting dressed, I discovered that when my brother and his friends got drunk last night one of them wanked into a pair of my panties and put them back in my wardrobe. The crusty mess pressed right into my groin. I had to clean dry spunk out of my pubic hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 157

You deserved it 618

Love Will Tear our T-shirt Apart

By Jeremy - 12/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I did my laundry at a laundromat. When I came back to get my clothes, I found an elderly man wearing my favorite Joy Division t-shirt, and he refused to give it back because he said it was his. I spent a few minutes arguing with him, before realizing I had grabbed someone else's clothes too. FML

I agree, your life sucks 123

You deserved it 477

superhumangambit 4

Thursday 16 August 2012 22:46

And I returned your aunt... With **** stains.

jewwybeanzzz 10

Thursday 16 August 2012 22:43

Nasty!! D:

Comments

jeffmusson1309 1

Friday 17 August 2012 0:45

That ucks

TheMaster15 10

Friday 17 August 2012 9:54

Your comment ucks too.

porkpiehat 8

Friday 17 August 2012 0:48

Bwahahaha!

LadyJoker21 0

Friday 17 August 2012 0:56

Damn

Obryn 9

Friday 17 August 2012 0:59

That was your shirt?!? Sorry about that.

Bullettrane 1

Friday 17 August 2012 1:04

she must be aunt Lucy because she sounds pretty loose.

avaritia 0

Friday 17 August 2012 1:16

THE HORROR, THE HORROR..

Keep_It_Hot99 8

Friday 17 August 2012 5:20

Yes, it is pretty horrifying.

martin_martian7 11

Friday 17 August 2012 1:35

**** on my shirt!!

ebfbruh 0

Friday 17 August 2012 1:42

At least it wasn't yet uncle...

Calyx_fml 21

Friday 17 August 2012 1:46

We're they your **** stains? Did you lend it to her that way cause you're a tard?

efrainelboricua 12

Friday 17 August 2012 2:07

Does it come with free harpies too? :D

quite_bored 9

Friday 17 August 2012 2:20

I hate when my shirts come back to me with winged spirits.

mikeymayhem_87 15

Friday 17 August 2012 4:31

Yeah... Screechy winged spirits tend to be annoying at times

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, while working the Sunday rush at the deli, I held up a piece of ham to a blind customer and asked him if it was thick enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 225

You deserved it 3 590

Today, I got a new kitten. He's orange, and definitely fits the stereotypes. I've already had to stop him from killing himself or otherwise getting into dangerous areas four times. I can't leave him alone for more than five seconds. Please tell me this is not a sign of the times to come. FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 311

Today, my new doctor asked if I'm sexually active. I said no. He nodded and murmured "No surprise there." Thanks, mate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 527

You deserved it 2 727

Today, my husband told me he was going to search from store to store in order to find my birthday gift. What was he really doing? His girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 082

You deserved it 4 188

Today, I realised that whenever I make eye contact with a stranger, I yawn. I work at a McDonald's FML

I agree, your life sucks 881

You deserved it 165

Today, my son claimed credit for a money-saving scheme at work that belonged to a colleague. He claimed this to someone in very upper management, but when they tried to ask follow-up questions, he obviously had no idea how to answer, admitted his lie and was sacked on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 998

You deserved it 442