Intimacy Message in a mattress - FML

Message in a mattress

FASHlONABLE - 05/04/2010 07:32 - United States

Today, I came back from a week long class trip. My mother took it upon herself to replace my bed sheets and clean my room. Apparently, she found a note under my mattress from my ex-boyfriend. It said "For all you future dudes, Connor was here first!" FML

37 346

10 035

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Get Out

Anonymous - 25/07/2013 06:04 - Australia - Mulgrave

Today, I came home to find that my mother had cleaned my room, and she'd done a very good job, too. So good in fact, that she even managed to remove all of the furniture, replacing it with a note that said, "It's time to go, sweetie XO". FML

51 168

8 146

Enough is enough

Rachaael - 19/01/2023 02:00

Today, I fell asleep at my boyfriend’s house and missed my curfew. It’s almost 4 a.m. Scrambling, I arrived home to find the locks changed. On the door knob was a note: “Go live with your boyfriend, you slut. See if he cooks and cleans up after you. I’ll help you move out your stuff in the morning. - Mom” FML

1 915

407

Not now, mom!

Anonymous - 28/09/2020 18:02 - United States - Gillette

Today, my mother showed up to pick something up from my house. I was sleeping and before I knew it she was in my bedroom, jumping on my bed, saying hi to my ex-girlfriend who she thought was with me. It wasn't my ex, and I doubt that girl will ever want to hang out again after that awkward morning. FML

1 304

207

nomorecleaning - 16/03/2013 12:17 - United States - Augusta

Today, I discovered that the reason my mom hasn't been noticing the extra cleaning I've done lately is because her boyfriend took credit when she asked about it; and was rewarded for it in bed. I helped him get with my mom. FML

42 189

4 047

Get out

wtf - 14/03/2011 04:07

Today, I came back to my boyfriend's house where I've been staying to find all my things thrown outside, ruined, including my entire CD collection, textbooks and clothes cut up. All because I had left my phone there and had got a text from a guy saying, "Hi, how have you been?" FML

59 583

8 972

laydeegaga - 07/03/2010 08:13

Today, my mom cleaned my room, while doing so she found a very detailed sex book I got from an ex boyfriend as a "gift". For years I had her convinced I was still a virgin, until today. FML

8 422

28 977

Carrier pigeon

Anonymous - 10/03/2022 12:00

Today, I sent my girlfriend a nice "Good morning" text after I woke up. Then I found a paper note stuck to my bedroom door, in which she broke up with me. FML

1 044

94

Creepy

Anonymous - 15/10/2013 20:52 - United Kingdom - Stretham

Today, my parents dropped by my new house, and my mother offered to tidy up for me while I was out. After they left, I noticed that her "tidying up" included throwing out all the pictures of my girlfriend and replacing them with pictures of herself. FML

51 646

4 851

Anonymous - 10/08/2018 06:00

Today, I found out my roommate has been using my bed for months because he didn't want his sheets to "smell like gay sex" when his mom washed them. FML

3 877

336

Dickhead - 25/11/2011 15:02 - Lebanon

Today, I found a condom on my bed with a note written by my girlfriend that said, "Since you started acting like a dick, you might as well dress like one." FML

14 550

62 344

wrigglezeus 0

Monday 5 April 2010 16:04

legend lol

Blur009er 0

Monday 5 April 2010 16:06

territory claimed

JigIsUp 0

Monday 12 April 2010 7:44

awesome rofl.

Chunchunchun 3

Monday 19 April 2010 18:49

Epic. Might do that actually ;)

shadowsbane 0

Monday 19 April 2010 21:04

Connor wins forever. The end.

amazemyself2 0

Tuesday 20 April 2010 4:47

my favorite FML ever.

vicky1_fml 0

Wednesday 21 April 2010 15:14

OMW...this FML has happened to me...I got suuuuuch a long lecture :/

wtsyrfce 0

Saturday 24 April 2010 7:50

roflmao. this is going onto my faveorites

thatsrugged 2

Wednesday 28 April 2010 0:23

hahah he claimed his territory!!

hollisterrchic94 0

Saturday 1 May 2010 17:17

i would do that to my boyfriend but i didnt take his virginity, he took mine lol

CraftyBadger 0

Saturday 22 May 2010 14:58

Dear god OP please tell my your name is Alison. Hi, its Connor. How's life?

DarkSecretLove 0

Tuesday 1 June 2010 19:52

O my that's something I'd do... It's awesome! This is no FML xD

5
6
7
8
9
10
11

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, I found out that the airhead sitting next to me at work who can't get anything done on her own, makes more money than I do. FML

2 017

164

Today, I realized my dog looks at me with way more love in his eyes than my own boyfriend does. FML

42 178

5 548

Today, I was out walking my dog. A cute woman said, "Nice dog!" Without thinking, I replied, "You too!" FML

18 297

44 896

Today, we’ve had a rat problem in our house for a few weeks. Recently I hid a bottle of booze in my room so my parents wouldn’t see it. But my parents saw a rat in my room and tore the whole thing apart to find it, eventually finding my bottle instead. I was literally ratted out by a rat. FML

1 790

2 776

Today, I went into work and noticed one of my fellow colleagues had a large bunch of flowers on her desk. As soon as I saw her, I immediately said, "Happy Birthday!" Everyone went quiet. It wasn't her birthday; her father had died. FML

22 480

56 799

Today, I asked my boyfriend if my ass looked big in my new jeans. He looked, and then started singing "I like big butts and I cannot lie". FML

13 173

44 736