Budget Spa By FML Approved - 25/10/2017 20:30 Who else is ready to take a personal day with this dog? I agree, your life sucks 506 You deserved it 120 Share Tweet Share
Today, before having morning sex, my girlfriend for over a year whispered to me, "Do that thing you did at the Halloween party." There was no morning sex as I reminded her that I was sick with the flu then and didn't go with her to the party. FML I agree, your life sucks 32 241 You deserved it 2 835
Today, I encouraged my husband to form a band with some of his other middle-aged friends, I just had no idea they would name their band The Wet Farts. FML I agree, your life sucks 908 You deserved it 384
Today, my boss signed and sent me back my timesheet. He named the PDF file "Timeshit". Now I don't know whether he's terrible at spelling, or just expressed his view of my job. FML I agree, your life sucks 13 754 You deserved it 1 252
Today, I woke up at my grandparents house since my mom was out of town, still half asleep i went to brush my teeth. Mid brush my mouth started getting numb I looked again at the tooth paste I used..turns out it was my grandpa's anti-itch anal cream. FML I agree, your life sucks 70 094 You deserved it 22 171
Today, after two and a half years of being single, I locked eyes with a cute girl. We were the same height at 6'1 so we joked that if we had a baby, it'd be huge. After some flirting, roughhousing, and making out, she gave me her number, and told me to bring condoms to her place. Then I woke up. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 684 You deserved it 387
Today, my 40 year-old idiot son declared he's going to become a priest. He’s not Catholic, not religious, married, expecting a baby, gambles, and only wants to do it because he read somewhere the clergy are tax exempt. FML I agree, your life sucks 910 You deserved it 194
I see carrots. Is it a bath, or are they making a stew?
Ok... that is just too cute for words! :)