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Submit your FML

Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


    Please read our guidelines for posting

    Cops

    No escape

    By natty - 16/03/2009 16:02 - United States

    Today, I went to a party and the cops came to bust the party. I jumped out the window of a second story house in order to avoid getting arrested. I broke my leg in three places and got a concussion. The cops let everyone go with a warning. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 46 316
    You deserved it 203 420
    Share  

    Stuck on Amber

    By River - 26/02/2009 16:17 - United States

    Today, a stoplight turned yellow as I was approaching it. I was about to go through but saw a cop, panicked, and slammed on the brakes. I ended up in the middle of the intersection and had to reverse. Soon the light turned green, and I stepped on the gas. My car was still in reverse. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 18 242
    You deserved it 56 195
    Share  

    Creeped out

    By Godfree - 25/02/2009 06:19 - United States

    Today, I was walking to a meeting and saw two girls trying to jump start a car in the rain. Thinking I'd be a gentleman and help them, I offered to assist. The girl whose car is broken down looks at me, looks at her friend, and says, "I think we'd better call the police." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 44 125
    You deserved it 3 261
    Share  
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    Keywords

    Miscellaneous Friends Pranks Weird Embarrassing Music Bodyshaming Kids Healthy Lifestyle Health Allergies Annoying Work Messy Animals Dogs Cute Family Love ACAB Cops Food Intimacy Thief NSFW Sex Fight #FAFO Parents Sexism
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
    Today, while working at Subway I joked with a customer asking him if he was going to order in Spanish. The women in front of him began yelling about how I was being racist and told my manager that I needed to be fired. The customer I was joking with was my Spanish teacher. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 41 017
    You deserved it 2 918
    Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce her to my parents. As we arrived, my grandpa was leaving the bathroom. He looked over at my girlfriend with a worried expression and said, "Never take a shit in this place. Feels like I wiped my arsehole with sandpaper." FML
    I agree, your life sucks 29 271
    You deserved it 2 810
    Today, it's my first day-off for the holidays. Today is also the day they decided to start building a house next to mine. I can't sleep beyond 7 am. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 27 956
    You deserved it 2 372
    Today, I was forced to use Egspy on my wife's iPhone. She is going out with a colleague in exchange for getting her promotion approved. I've never had any hints or doubts, but it seems she's having illicit relations with multiple colleagues. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 551
    You deserved it 161
    Today, I realized how boring and sexually deprived my life is when I found a gas station ten cents cheaper than the one I usually use. It gave me both an asthma attack and an erection, simultaneously. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 47 796
    You deserved it 6 996
    Today, I tried to write a journal entry about my day, but since I've become so used to going on tangents, my daily entry did everything but talk about my day. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 303
    You deserved it 644
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