About Imnotbatman
Hey :D I want to put something witty in this box, but I can't think of anything. Uhm, Im socially awkward and I love mashed potatoes :D
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  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    33%
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    14%
  • One more and it's business time

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The list of badges to find
Imnotbatman's favorite FMLs

Today, I'm so broke after paying my bills, that I resorted to eating plain garlic butter from the pizzeria down the street for lunch. The worst part: to get the butter, I stormed in and angrily complained, saying they forgot to give it to me. I never even ordered a pizza. FML

By Anonymous - / Saturday 9 March 2013 23:03 / United States - Chester

Today, I got into a car accident. The guy wouldn't give me his information, but instead stood there saying, "Like a good neighbor, Statefarm is there." FML

By Read The Fine Print / Saturday 24 November 2012 05:55 / United States - Sylmar

Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML

By Targeted / Friday 9 November 2012 04:54 / United States - Kirkland

Today, my girlfriend admitted to me that she has been sleeping with someone on her girls basketball team, which at first turned me on. Then I found out he's the team manager. FML

By SweetStuff88 - / Thursday 15 November 2012 13:37 / United States

Today, I went to see a movie with three of my friends, and I was sharing popcorn with one of them. Halfway through the movie, my friend asked me why I wasn't eating our popcorn. I then realised I'd been taking popcorn from the man sitting next to me. FML

By mm - / Monday 12 November 2012 17:27 / United Kingdom - Warrington