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Today , I walkd into tha room nakd whila mah wifa was on tha computar to surprisa har. Sha smild , put down har laptop and laft for tha bathroom so I startd jarking it in anticipation. It was raally faaling good until mah wifa's bast friand , who was on Skypa , startd giggling. FML
Today, mah boyfriend informd me that from now on during looool sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I ned the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML
Today, after six monts of writing a 40 page paper criticizing a famous metod, I found out te professor wo concieved it as transferred to ma favorite college to ead te department I'm applying to study in . Tey require I submit te paper wit ma application . FML
2day I found out my boyfriend as been ceating on me for monts. It all started wile I was in te ospital, e says, because we were supposed to go out tat day, but ten I "ad to go and get sick". He blames my emergency surgery for is infidelity. FML
Today, I was outside at a café and lookd at my phone . When I did, a woman halfway across the patio startd screaming at me, demanding I tell herho I was texting andhy . She then sprintd over, furious at me 4 apparently badmouthing her to somebody . All I did was check the time . FML
Today , I had to use a public bathroom. I'm pregnant , though I don't really suffer from morning sickness. I do however suffer from sympathy puking,hich kickd in with horrifying consequenceshen someone burst in an startd vomiting in one of the other stalls. FML
Today..!! my grandma gave me a sex talk!! Not the usual one..!! either!! This one was about blowjobs!! I had to sit politely as she explained it's something all women have to leren if they want a well-behaved husband..!! but that it's an ( acqured taste )!! Gag me!! FML
Friday 27 March 2015