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Offline (the 12/03/2016 at 11:26pm)



  • Town/Country : Sacramento, United States
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 January 1990 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1954
  • Number of comments : 276
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About zenrael : I stay up late.

zenrael's page activity

Visits<b>big_sam1991</b> - the 11/20/2016 at 8:23am<b>im_a_squid</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 10:21pm<b>tyler530</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 9:21pm<b>French_giirl</b> - the 08/21/2016 at 11:08am<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 08/20/2016 at 11:22pm<b>Ruskiy_Cherep</b> - the 07/31/2016 at 6:54pm<b>joco4</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 3:34pm<b>StateOfEuphoria</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 3:24pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 07/02/2016 at 8:07pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 06/25/2016 at 4:19am<b>QualityChrisTime</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 10:47pm<b>Chibster</b> - the 06/19/2016 at 5:28am<b>OmgimBored</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 10:33pm<b>NarutoLove</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 11:44pm<b>imaginaation</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 8:53pm<b>sskibba</b> - the 04/01/2016 at 2:59pm<b>cutycat136</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 8:06pm<b>yuno_gasai</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 2:55am

Fucked!<b>StateOfEuphoria</b> - the 07/25/2016 at 9:24pm<b>ragnarok1540</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 2:07am<b>FrenchToastKick</b> - the 10/13/2015 at 1:03am<b>highbutshygirll</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 1:30pm<b>constipation</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:56pm<b>ambert0322</b> - the 08/25/2015 at 1:05pm<b>pl0xs3rver</b> - the 08/21/2015 at 8:49pm<b>whitetiger13131</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 4:50am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 05/17/2015 at 3:18am<b>youngmuller1</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 9:31am<b>kikoma</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 2:46pm<b>PicanteSeed</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 7:46am<b>C00kiesNcream</b> - the 04/01/2015 at 8:55pm<b>lolonewsom</b> - the 02/05/2015 at 4:49am

zenrael's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of zenrael's badges

zenrael's favorite FMLs

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

by Notadrinkanddriveidiot / 12/07/2011 at 9:46am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

by perenoel / 12/03/2011 at 11:24am / France / Kids

Today, I went to go get my driver's license, only to be told that I need a copy of my birth certificate. In order to get the copy of my birth certificate, I need a driver's license or my passport. In order to get a passport, I need a copy of my birth certificate or a drivers license. I have none. FML

by Anonymous / 11/29/2011 at 1:40pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I won $20 on a scratch ticket my grandma bought me. She wants it back. FML

by dasteve / 11/29/2011 at 12:45am / United States (Idaho) / Money

Today, my husband asked me, "Why do you love me?" I spent the next five minutes spilling my heart and soul out to him. After I'd asked the same question, he looked me straight in the eye and said, "I don't." FML

by nirvana_mama157 / 11/28/2011 at 7:51am / United States (District of Columbia) / Love

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting a historical war bunker when I accidentally let rip a small fart. My boyfriend responded with a horribly loud, horrendous fart, and loudly announced, "This is war." There were people, lots of people. FML

by Dani / 11/28/2011 at 7:34am / Reserved / Miscellaneous

Today, I rubbed my face in my armpit stubble because it felt like my ex-boyfriend's face. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2011 at 10:51pm / United States / Love

Today, I came home from a weekend trip with some friends, and walked straight in on my girlfriend cheating on me. She burst into tears and began apologizing. Her exact words were "I'm so sorry! I thought you were coming back tomorrow." FML

by cheated / 11/23/2011 at 12:03pm / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I went to the orthodontist. The lady took a break and went to use the restroom. Apparently she didn't bother to take her gloves off, and they smelled like straight up pee. She had her hands in my mouth for over an hour. FML

by Bob / 11/22/2011 at 1:06pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, my 11 year old sister deleted me off Facebook because I'm not "cool enough" to be seen on her profile. FML

by sourcandy013 / 11/20/2011 at 9:21pm / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend for the first time. In an attempt to be romantic, I tried taking her panties off with my teeth. I got a mouthful of pubes stuck in my braces. FML

by Tyler / 11/19/2011 at 3:05am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my now ex-boyfriend called me over for an "important chat". This chat consisted of him not only insisting that we have sex whenever he feels like it, but demanding that I take birth control pills, because making him wear a condom is "sexist and degrading". FML

by Anonymous / 11/18/2011 at 6:36pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Intimacy

Today, while driving and singing, I noticed a large fly inside my car. I stopped singing so it wouldn't fly into my mouth. That didn't stop it from flying up my nose, causing me to swerve and drive into a ditch. FML

by jdancerchick / 11/16/2011 at 8:47am / United States / Transportation

Today, my mom called me crazy and told me she wanted to put me in a mental hospital. She did this after repeatedly hitting me with a shoe. Why? Because I forgot to put the cap back on the toothpaste. FML

by whoopsboutthecap / 11/15/2011 at 7:51am / United States / Miscellaneous