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zenrael

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zenrael

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zenrael
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 8 January 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 729
  • Number of comments : 187
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About zenrael : You will never get this gypsy!

zenrael's page activity

Visits<b>emilyyy_maryyy</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 2:51am<b>jbcy</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 8:01am<b>qdawg06</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 7:53pm<b>cherrio27</b> - the 11/01/2014 at 3:44pm<b>RaspberryFlower</b> - the 10/28/2014 at 9:51am<b>juliajean</b> - the 09/06/2014 at 7:41pm<b>timelawd</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 12:19am<b>MaryssaJean</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 9:11pm<b>lailakhan</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 2:11pm<b>SlipperyNipple</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 12:25pm<b>ylime23456</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:50pm<b>Mahak1099</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 10:44pm<b>FrenchieJoking</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 8:51pm<b>KhaleesiStorm</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 8:20pm<b>jbond97</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 8:18pm<b>adamxxx2567</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 7:48pm<b>leopardwilliam</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:31pm<b>kirstenburke</b> - the 08/26/2014 at 6:14pm

zenrael's FML badges

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zenrael's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom got a new puppy and named her Olivia. Which would be fine, if that wasn't the name I had been planning to give my baby, who's due in 3 weeks. Thanks mom. FML

#19983667
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26257) - you deserved it (2106)

On 07/25/2012 at 3:46pm - kids - by madmomma - United States (Oregon)

Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML

#19979543
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19250) - you deserved it (7142)

On 07/23/2012 at 11:41am - work - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while at work, I witnessed a kid empty his bladder all over the floor. His mother walked over, looked at me, said "yep... that just happened" and dragged him away. I'm a 30-year-old man, four credits shy of a Master's, stuck cleaning up piss at a dead-end job. FML

#19867742
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23311) - you deserved it (2754)

On 06/29/2012 at 7:12pm - kids - by ihatewalmart (man) - United States

Today, I was cashiering, and a customer's change came to $5.51. She looked pretty stinking rich, so I just gave her $5.50. She demanded the extra penny, and I asked if she really needed it. She said, "No, but they do, asshole," and dropped her $5.51 in the charity donation box. FML

#19781749
285 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8402) - you deserved it (105171)

On 06/13/2012 at 12:00pm - money - by ouch - United States (Florida)

Today, I finally summed up the courage to break up with my abusively controlling girlfriend. I don't know what I was thinking, but instead of leaving as a free man, I left as an engaged one. FML

#19705817
364 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17474) - you deserved it (42716)

On 05/30/2012 at 6:35pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, at work, my friend dared me to answer the next call on my phone by saying, "This is your local sperm bank. You jack it, we pack it." I did it. The person on the phone was my boss. FML

#19682982
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10533) - you deserved it (40726)

On 05/26/2012 at 10:42am - intimacy - by girly girly - United States (Texas)

Today, I was at the laundromat when a huge, tattoo-covered man wearing nothing but denim booty shorts and a wife-beater sat down beside me. He stared at me for a while, before telling me all about how I reminded him of his "first prison bitch." FML

#19644212
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25246) - you deserved it (1936)

On 05/18/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while sitting at a red light, I guiltily nibbled on a chocolate bar and looked around to make sure no one saw me cheating on my diet.  A police car pulled up, I panicked, stepped on the gas, and ran the light. FML

#19609899
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8648) - you deserved it (47920)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:27am - misc - by Snickers (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had to explain to my neighbor that not all black people are lactose intolerant. His eyes still bulge out every time I eat cheese. FML

Today, my eleven year old daughter called me a moron, after I told her she was dead wrong when she claimed that rabbits lay eggs. FML

#19376586
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22844) - you deserved it (4592)

On 03/30/2012 at 2:44pm - kids - by James (man) - United States

Today, my boss pulled me aside to chastise me for being "off task" because I was chatting with a co-worker while working on a project. She then spent a half hour chatting with the same person about what daycare she should go to for her new baby. FML

#19369519
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19820) - you deserved it (1802)

On 03/29/2012 at 11:42am - work - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I was humming the Star Wars theme song while on the bus. When my stop came I walked down the aisle only to hear a girl mutter, "The virginity is strong in this one." She's right. FML

#19249399
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22961) - you deserved it (18527)

On 03/10/2012 at 1:50am - misc - by starboy - United States (California)

Today, my parents were coming to visit me at my brand new apartment. I made dinner and served them the cake my roomate had left for me in the fridge. Thirty minutes after they left, I was so baked that I couldn't think straight. I still don't know if my parents made it home. FML

#18579511
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29932) - you deserved it (7654)

On 12/22/2011 at 1:11pm - misc - by Cookie (woman) - South Africa

Today, some friends and I were pulled over on our way back from a party. We'd had a few drinks, so we tried to play it cool just in case we were over the limit. The cop didn't seem to want to breathalyze us, until my really high friend in the back seat said, "These are not the droids you are looking for." FML

#18451653
282 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13016) - you deserved it (41306)

On 12/07/2011 at 9:46am - misc - by Notadrinkanddriveidiot - United States

Today, I dressed up as Santa Claus for my employees' children. After seeing all the others, my daughter's turn arrived. She sat on my lap, put her lips to my ear, and whispered softly: "I want a new dad." FML

#18418543
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55363) - you deserved it (5534) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/03/2011 at 11:24am - kids - by perenoel - France



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