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yeti09

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yeti09
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2765
  • Number of comments : 40
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriends house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML

#3718923
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8879) - you deserved it (40672)

On 07/13/2009 at 3:06pm - love - by Matt (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, while riding on the car with my family, I put on my headphones and pretended to be listening to music and when my parents talked to me, I pretended I couldn't hear them. They took this opportunity to discuss how fat I was and how I can't hold down a boyfriend. They were laughing as well. FML

#3718227
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45457) - you deserved it (18560)

On 07/13/2009 at 2:33pm - misc - by Solemnwishing (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had my first kiss at a party. Later, I was told that the guy had been dared to kiss the ugliest girl in the room. FML

#3714352
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67982) - you deserved it (5796)

On 07/13/2009 at 11:00am - misc - by FirstKiss (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my younger brother, who is 15, had to show me the quickest way to take off a woman's bra. I'm 12 years older than he is. FML

#3642336
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43460) - you deserved it (11850)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by nerd_man01 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my younger brother, who is 15, had to show me the quickest way to take off a woman's bra. I'm 12 years older than he is. FML

#3642336
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43460) - you deserved it (11850)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:20pm - intimacy - by nerd_man01 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I paid $80 to change my cell number because my ex-girlfriend had been stalking me. To inform all of my friends of the change, I sent a mass text message to everyone in my phonebook. Including my ex. FML

#3642198
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9909) - you deserved it (70631)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:15pm - love - by Blackberry (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I paid $80 to change my cell number because my ex-girlfriend had been stalking me. To inform all of my friends of the change, I sent a mass text message to everyone in my phonebook. Including my ex. FML

#3642198
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9909) - you deserved it (70631)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:15pm - love - by Blackberry (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I paid $80 to change my cell number because my ex-girlfriend had been stalking me. To inform all of my friends of the change, I sent a mass text message to everyone in my phonebook. Including my ex. FML

#3642198
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9909) - you deserved it (70631)

On 07/10/2009 at 3:15pm - love - by Blackberry (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

#3639578
459 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57486) - you deserved it (30030)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was taking a shower and I saw a new body wash that said "radiance ribbons." That sounded a little effeminate, but it smelled manly enough and the only alternative was normal soap, so I used it. Just now, I stepped out into the sun and found out what "radiance ribbons" means. I sparkle. FML

#3639578
459 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57486) - you deserved it (30030)

On 07/10/2009 at 1:03pm - misc - by takinabreak (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was going to do some laundry, with the washer and dryer I bought off of Craigslist for 150 dollars. The washer leaks and the dryer doesn't dry. So I called the guy and left an angry message about how the washer flooded my kitchen. In fact I just forgot to hook up the drain hose. FML

#3639163
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4989) - you deserved it (53810)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was going to do some laundry, with the washer and dryer I bought off of Craigslist for 150 dollars. The washer leaks and the dryer doesn't dry. So I called the guy and left an angry message about how the washer flooded my kitchen. In fact I just forgot to hook up the drain hose. FML

#3639163
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4989) - you deserved it (53810)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

#3604059
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16840) - you deserved it (55010)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I gave my boyfriend a spontaneous blowjob while we were watching TV. After he finished, I tried to pull a sexy move I'd seen in a porno by zipping his pants back up with my teeth. His foreskin got caught in the zipper and we spent the next few hours in the emergency room. FML

#3604059
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16840) - you deserved it (55010)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I hit a horrible tee shot from the 18th hole. I decided to use my driver to take my frustration out on a nearby bush. The bees who lived in that bush decided to use their stingers to take out their frustration up inside my golf shorts. FML

#3555037
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10182) - you deserved it (59722)

On 07/07/2009 at 2:19pm - misc - by Jon (man) - United States



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