xxxdesperadoxxx

Search for a member

Offline (the 06/14/2016 at 3:27am)

xxxdesperadoxxx

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 20 September 1982 (33 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 995
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

xxxdesperadoxxx's page activity

Visits<b>laurellkawes</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 9:36pm<b>dcs00</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 2:18pm<b>joejoe1415</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 2:16pm<b>SLFrankyD</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 11:25pm<b>tartar18</b> - the 01/27/2015 at 12:02pm<b>Jae_Hellyun</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 11:23am<b>morganlefey13</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 10:33pm<b>hurtfeet</b> - the 01/18/2015 at 2:00am<b>briang959</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 10:04am<b>countryb_cth</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 9:58am<b>animelover9427</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 9:33pm<b>Larissa24</b> - the 02/08/2014 at 8:55am<b>Kain713</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 5:15pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 10:36pm<b>germy21</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 6:22pm<b>neeni88</b> - the 08/21/2013 at 7:37am<b>TheBrochure</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 5:11am<b>miwako</b> - the 02/06/2013 at 11:14am

Fucked!<b>laurellkawes</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 3:37am<b>dcs00</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 8:18pm

xxxdesperadoxxx's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of xxxdesperadoxxx's badges

xxxdesperadoxxx's favorite FMLs

Today, to show that he really wanted me to shave myself, my boyfriend pretended to go down on me, but instead of following through, he stuck a wad of gum in my pubic hair and got back up. FML

by Prinpette / 09/20/2011 at 5:20pm / France / Intimacy

Today, I realized my tampon goes deeper than my boyfriend. FML

by Cantgetno / 09/20/2011 at 3:45am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML

by jshi8 / 08/04/2011 at 10:35am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous

Today, while stuck in traffic on the highway, my 5 year old in the back seat asked me why the man in the car next to us was pulling on the other man's "peepee". FML

by whatnot / 08/04/2011 at 12:04am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 1:24am / France / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend asked me to 'spice things up in the bedroom'. When I asked how, he said I could try wearing a paper bag over my head. FML

by georgiahick / 12/30/2010 at 9:09am / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend told me the reason she asked me to shave my beard. When I go down on her shaved, it feels more like her ex-boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/25/2010 at 4:26pm / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years tell his friend he was going to "pop the question". Ecstatic, I wore my nicest dress and got my hair done for dinner. Near the end, he leant in romantically and asked if we could start doing anal. So much for marriage. FML

by snoozerlooser / 12/24/2010 at 7:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, the elevator got stuck in between floor 4 and 5 at my doctors office. I had been having violent diarrhea. It was the reason I was at the doctor. Elevator was stuck for 35 minutes. During that time, I diarrhea'd in my pants twice. There were seven other people in the elevator. FML

by Christopher / 12/13/2010 at 4:16am / Canada (Alberta) / Health

Today, my daughter and husband decided to surprise me at work. A whole bunch of my co-workers were standing around me when she ran up and hugged me. Her face is level with my crotch. She immediately jumps back from the hug and says "ewwww smells like fish." FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:58pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when I came. She got pissed and slapped me really hard for cumming inside her because she didnt want to get pregnant. 1. I was wearing a condom. 2. She's on the pill. 3. We were having anal sex. FML

by Tai / 10/31/2010 at 9:30am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a rush and forgot to flush the toilet after taking a huge dump. After coming home from work, I check my facebook to find myself tagged by my boyfriend in a photo. The photo was of the toilet, with the caption: "This is what Taco Bell does." FML

by tanya / 10/25/2010 at 8:32am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was working on my family genealogy. I found out that my best friend's great-grandfather murdered my great-grandfather. FML

by cantstoplaughing / 10/06/2010 at 12:32am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous