Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

xxmarissaaaxx

Search for a member

xxmarissaaaxx
  • Town/Country : St. Petersburg, Russian Federation
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 26 April 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 890
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About xxmarissaaaxx : Hi, I'm Marissa I love music, math, my friends, and anteaters. I'm autistic and I have Tourette's Syndrome. I don't comment a lot. The English language isn't my first so please don't hate me if I understand something wrong. :) OK well, I love you! Paka!

xxmarissaaaxx's last visitors

VampOfSavannahICastilloaustin6767

xxmarissaaaxx's FML badges

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

See all of xxmarissaaaxx's badges

xxmarissaaaxx's favorite FMLs

Today, I came out to my parents. They still think I'm joking. FML

#19469914
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24869) - you deserved it (4951)

On 04/15/2012 at 12:12am - misc - by Gayeveryday (man) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, my parents invited my Muslim boyfriend over for dinner for the first time. My mother made sure that everything including the salad had pork in it. FML

#19465353
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29308) - you deserved it (6191)

On 04/14/2012 at 7:10am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Egypt (Al Qahirah)

Today, my boss fired me because he wants to start dating my mother and apparently doesn't want it to be "awkward." FML

#19464773
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23318) - you deserved it (1329)

On 04/14/2012 at 1:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up with a splitting headache. I have no idea what happened the night before, except for the fact that I'd tucked two uncapped vodka bottles into bed beside me, and now my room reeks of a Russian sorority house. FML

#19417580
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5284) - you deserved it (20729)

On 04/06/2012 at 12:58pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to family therapy because my mom wanted the family to be closer. When asked what her biggest disappointment was in life, she turned to me and said, "Having a gay son" then patted my hand, smiled, and said "No offense, honey." FML

#19416879
233 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36595) - you deserved it (6304)

On 04/06/2012 at 10:24am - misc - by Sadboy (man) - United States

Today, I went to my first meeting at the university women's group, excited to become a more involved feminist. The first item on the meeting's agenda? The upcoming bake sale. FML

#19415450
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8874) - you deserved it (21476)

On 04/06/2012 at 12:45am - misc - by feminismlol (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I realized my Internet addiction had gone too far when I tried to Google what was in my freezer. FML

#19413204
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5397) - you deserved it (22269)

On 04/05/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my Christian accountability partner from church to talk about continuing to maintain Christian values. We had sex. Oh, the irony. FML

#19409993
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7720) - you deserved it (34275)

On 04/05/2012 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Badchristian (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I offered an elderly man my seat on the train. He thanked me by winking and offering me a seat on his lap. FML

#19387576
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16907) - you deserved it (2140)

On 04/01/2012 at 9:53am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML

#19352166
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18687) - you deserved it (4834)

On 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm - intimacy - by JC (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I found out my 12 year old daughter is going through a bit of an "emotional" stage. I got a call from her school saying she was sitting in the corner at recess trying to cut her wrist. With a plastic spoon. FML

#19350596
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22943) - you deserved it (4442)

On 03/26/2012 at 10:54am - kids - by ohhdear.___. (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend got really excited that he'd broken his own record; he can now last a full 2 minutes in bed. FML

#19348110
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26156) - you deserved it (3210)

On 03/25/2012 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by user210 (woman) - United States

Today, I received my first payment of child support from my estranged husband: $50 and a note that said he wouldn't be paying any more. FML

#19335600
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18551) - you deserved it (2875)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:39pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43684) - you deserved it (4210)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. Let's just say pubes and toilet paper residue were the least of my problems. FML

#19330918
322 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43684) - you deserved it (4210)

On 03/23/2012 at 1:55am - intimacy - by mrricecakes (man) - United States (Arizona)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: