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xneonlightsx

Offline (the 10/23/2014 at 3:30am) | Search for a member

xneonlightsx

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 18 October 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1353
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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xneonlightsx's page activity

Visits<b>CourtneyDanielle</b> - the 04/10/2010 at 9:27pm

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xneonlightsx's favorite FMLs

Today, my husband and I found the perfect house, in our price range and everything we wanted in a house. However, the street it's on is called "Arbour Butte Road". My husband refuses to buy it because he doesn't want it to sound like he lives "in a tree's ass." I'm married to an idiot. FML

#20451265
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29422) - you deserved it (5715)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:53am - misc - by it's just a name (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, within the first 15 minutes of a nonstop 8-hour flight, the guy sitting next to me picked an eyelash he found on my face, stared at it for a few seconds, and stuck it in his mouth. FML

#20447129
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41510) - you deserved it (2337)

On 01/07/2013 at 11:16pm - misc - by legitweirdo - United States (New York)

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25867) - you deserved it (5221)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my neighbor went on vacation, leaving me in charge of his cat and dog. For some reason, he calls his dog "Cat" and his cat "Dog". There are two pet food containers, one labeled "Cat" and the other labeled "Dog". I have no idea which one goes to which animal. FML

#20437796
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37842) - you deserved it (4009)

On 01/02/2013 at 1:07am - animals - by catdog - United States (California)

Today, I had to watch my drunk girlfriend yell at a cat for not having periods. The worst part is that she was at a pet store. The pet store at which I work. FML

#20431107
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28422) - you deserved it (3270)

On 12/30/2012 at 12:20am - misc - by Wtf is wrong with her (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My daughter's $11 One Direction poster. What will it cost to fix my car? $1,000. FML

#20427068
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36434) - you deserved it (3660)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

#20426492
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51432) - you deserved it (7016)

On 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by well, i am now (woman) - United States

Today, my ex-boyfriend of over 4 years decided to turn up outside my house at 1am, drunk off his ass, to confess his love for me. When I told him I'd moved on and am happily engaged, he cried on the grass for an hour, then tried to steal my cat. FML

#20423470
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39949) - you deserved it (4029)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend is seriously mad at me for telling his cat what he got it for Christmas. FML

#20415555
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34459) - you deserved it (8230)

On 12/23/2012 at 3:24am - animals - by Kate (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked in on my son and his friend comparing their penis sizes. They're 6. FML

#20415295
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36121) - you deserved it (5099)

On 12/23/2012 at 1:02am - misc - by oh my son - Canada (Ontario)

Today, after sharing my first night in bed with my boyfriend, I woke up early, and decided to rouse him with some surprise oral. It didn't go so well; he woke up screaming and gasped, "OH MY GOD! I thought you were my cat!" before telling me to continue. FML

#20412240
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41827) - you deserved it (8181)

On 12/21/2012 at 8:16pm - intimacy - by anonymaiacciu (woman) - France

Today, I once again walked in on my husband eating our cat's food. FML

#20409541
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33610) - you deserved it (3986)

On 12/20/2012 at 7:26pm - misc - by jsmills92 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

#20199342
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26792) - you deserved it (6296)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:40pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Vastmanlands Lan)

Today, I was at the breakfast table when my sister started eating a banana. Before I knew what was happening, I'd somehow popped a boner. I had to wait for her to leave before I could stand up. FML

#20195358
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30853) - you deserved it (22839)

On 12/07/2012 at 5:40pm - intimacy - by bill219 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

#20193303
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25083) - you deserved it (4776)

On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States



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